|Mind if I blow you, sir?|
So who are the biggest true villains of the past—I don’t know—30 years? I was able to piece together a Mount Rushmore(!) on this actually so you know that this is ELITE. I’ve come up with four categories: Owner, Coach, Player, and Team.
OWNER: Donald Sterling – OBVZ. I’m kind of hoping that he goes with the scorched earf mentality here. I don’t want him to lay down his sword. I want him to go all Braveheart on the PC Police. It was disheartening to hear that his wife was going to accept offers this week. But I was pumped to hear that Big Don changed his mind and now wants to fight to the literal death. THIS MAN is truly hated by all.
COACH: Urban Meyer – Oh yeah, total shithead that nobody likes or respects. The easiest coach to root against out there. I think that it speaks volumes that Florida fans despise him. Nicky SabeCakes might be close but he actually has a winning record against Clemson (no idea if hes ever even faced them).
PLAYER: Alex Rodriguez – Does anyone else even come close? He cheated. He lied. He lied some more. He kept cheating. He could have went down as the greatest baseball to ever live. Now, not only do opposing fans hate him but I would guess that 99% of Yankees fans loathe him, too (NOT ME!!!). The best part about A-Rod is how dumb he is. When he comes back, he will get the shit booed out of him and then say after the game that it was great to get back out there and play in front of these great fans. He is totally oblivious to reality.
TEAM: The U – It was either them or The Bad Boys. Both teams truly embraced the role of the villain and gave no fucks about what you thought of them. They were brash. They played dirty. They fought. I will give The Bad Boys a little credit because they worked hard and busted their asses every night. The U didn’t do that. They relied on talent and swag. Those Canes teams should have won at least 5 titles in a row. They barely won any. Let’s not forget that Jerry Sandusky’s finest coaching moment (outside of watching Mike McQueery shower) was upsetting The U when they showed up to the Fiesta Bowl in fatigues (chronologically, this might not be accurate…DEAL WITH IT).
So there we go. My Mount Rushmore of ELITE Sports Villains is truly ELITE. You won’t find one decent person who tries to argue against this. Now if you don’t mind, I need to spend all weekend figuring out how I can photoshop Lance Stephenson blowing into the ear of centaur A-Rod. I’ve got big plans as you can see.