Tuesday, November 04, 2014

College Football Week 10

I'm just gonna go find a toilet to puke in...

The Dave Brandon era is officially over in Ann Arbor.  Thank fucking God.  I've heard some names being thrown out there already but one that needs to be avoided at all costs is Jeff Long.  Apparently he and Hoke are long time friends and went to the same high school.  Fuck that guy.  We don't need a buddy of Brady Hoke coming in and making up reasons to keep a terrible coach.  But I digress.  I'm sure there will be a future post about this at some point now that Dave Brandon is done ruining my life.  To the games.

Michigan vs. Indiana

How does Indiana have the second leading rusher in the Big 10?  Seems like he's wasting his time at such a shit bag school.  He's probably there for the meth and to get run over by a car being operated by a drunk team mate.  Too soon?  Nah...because fuck Tom CreanPie.  Anyway.  It's nice to see that Michigan hasn't sunk to the level of losing to Indiana.  Eighteen in a row and this game wasn't close.  I'm not going to praise anyone's performance in this one on the Michigan side because it was fucking Indiana.  I'll leave the stat drooling against shitty teams to Drew since he does it so well.

Florida St. vs. Louisville

Is Jimbo Fisher the most hated coach in college football?  If not, he sure is trying to fucking vault himself up to the top.  I'm not sure if he feels pressure to out shit head Bobby Bowden but hooo boy he is certainly giving one thousand percent on that front.  Fisher would throw his reputation behind a serial killer as long as that dude was winning him football games.  Karlos Williams.  A tremendous kid.  An ambassador.  Don't forget a fucking drug dealer and a woman beater as well, Jimbo.  LOLOLOL!!  This team is about to go down hard and I can't believe they didn't lose to Louisville Thursday.  I don't know how anyone can support this team or Fisher.  It's pretty despicable.

The Handshake Snub Heard 'Round The World

I loved this move.  It takes a real man to snub the pre game handshake.  I honestly didn't think it was as big of a deal as everyone is making it out to be.  Penn State disrespected Maryland and they chose to disrespect PSU back by not shaking hands with them.  Who cares?  Penn State started all this shit anyway so why are they so butt hurt about it?  The only issue I had was Randy Edsall apologizing for this baller fucking move.  Don't apologize.  Own that shit.  It was amazing.  This rivalry would be really great if both teams weren't really shitty.

Georgia vs. Florida

Jesus Christ, Bulldogs.  This team is fucking maddening.  Dawg has to be absolutely beside himself.  You really have no clue what Georgia team is going to show up from week to week, do you?  Georgia was in the driver's seat to the SEC championship game but instead they did one too many shots of Rumplemintz and ended up taking the fat girl with the mustache home.  They should have blown the tits off of Dead Man Walkin' Muschamp's terrible team.  Never in my life have I seen a team attempt 6 passes and win.  This game had to take Grumpy back to the Red Grange days.

Ohio vs. IlliNOISE

OMG!  Ohio is the best team in the country!!  J.T. Barrett for Heisman!!  It'll be a crime against humanity if the panel overlooks such impressive wins like this one. grumble grumble grumble....

Ole Miss vs. Auburn

Bo Wallace was far less shitty in this game than he was a week ago.  Fucker was throwing ropes in the 4th quarter when it mattered.  Buuuuuuut...he did have a late game fumble in the red zone that was an absolute killer.  Ole Miss had two chances down the stretch to win this and didn't.  Brutal way to lose.  Auburn is starting to look like one of the luckiest teams in the country.  Oh...and RIP Laquon Treadwell's ability to walk normal ever again.  That's the worst way to go out.  Done for the year and didn't score the go ahead touchdown on that play to boot.  Man.  That injury was fuckin disgusting.

Arkansas vs. Mississippi St.

Arkansas seems like a tough out every single week.  They're getting smoked in the SEC but they sure as shit don't go down without a fight.  Or maybe this is just another case of #1 getting someone's best shot.  LOL!  In case teams didn't know this about Prescott.  MAKE HIM THROW THE BALL!  Now there's no excuse moving forward.

Notre Dame vs. Navy

Cakes favorite shitty team to pump up sure did hang tough with the Golden FuckTwats.  A Notre Dame loss to Navy this year would have been as good as being jerked off while being choked out.  Fuck Larry in his stupid fucking ass.

There it is.  I've got nothing else to add.  Nothing too crazy today.  Have a great first Tuesday AB (After Brandon).


Anonymous said...

Treadwell went from a 1st round lock in two years to possibly never being good at football again....and he didn't even score. Devastating injury.

What the Maryland captains did was fucking stupid. I'd be pissed if OSU captains pulled that stunt.

"Eighteen in a row"....did you just throw in a random brag about Michigan beating Hoosier football 18 times in a row? LMBO.

Jeff Long to Michigan and he'll bring Bielema with him....LOLZ. But, seriously...fuck Dave Brandon. That man is a true asshole and deserves bad things.

Buckeyes did what they needed to do....kill Illinois and avoid injuries. Happy they got Barrett out at halftime.

Very pumped for Saturday...I've had my tickets since July for this one. Still not sure how I'm feeling it will go, but I'll go on record with a prediction by Friday.


Mr. Ace said...

I'd be okay with Long. He's made good decisions at Arkansas under some tough circumstances, unlike our previous pizza boy. Nobody can save Hoke.

When did the pregame handshake become such a big deal. Never seen so many people outraged over some pregame formality. And now Maryland is fines 10k and Diggs is suspended a game. What a fucking joke.

Michigan is probably the best team in the country without Dave Brandon. NOW WE ROLL!

Mr. Ace said...


GMoney said...

I'm with Drool. Fuck Maryland. That was some low class shit. Oh you poor babies felt disrespected by Molester University? DEAL WITH IT. You know what's better than embarrassing yourself? BEATING THEM. And you did but all that people will talk about is how stupid you are.

I hope you get killed up there, Drew. Would solve a lot of problems but make sure you leave me some hockey tickets that you will definitely owe me.

Clearly Dave Brandon was holding WE ON back. Now...WE ON AGAIN!

The SEC night games were fantastic this week and I didn't even get to see SC choke and Spurrier have a hilarious press conference. MUCH better than putting Tim Beckman on primetime (not giving up on this).

Dawg needs to give up on UGA and commit fully to a winning program like the RedHawks.

Ole Miss has some really shitty luck. Then again, they were still segregated last week so whatever.

I voted today and I fully admit that I did not vote for Lil Strut. Granted, I could have but I wouldn't if I could. I just don't feel like he cares about me.

GMoney said...

By the way, no one has seen this kid play but WMU Freshman RB Jarvion Franklin is something special. The kid leads the nation in touchdowns and is going to break all sorts of records barring injury. At 18 years old, he has an NFL body already. #RowTheBoat #MACtion

Speaking of MACtion, it returns tonight!!! The crown jewel of November sports programming has returned!

Anonymous said...

That's the 2nd time you have brought up this WMU running back and still nobody cares.

The game on Saturday was really boring. I have no idea what happened in the 2nd half as I was busy doing shots. This has been a one game season from the start and I'm glad it's finally here.

Long and Bert coming to UM would be a great move...for me to poop on. Actually it would be fun to have my least liked coach to go with my least liked program.


GMoney said...

That's the 2nd time you have brought up this WMU running back and still nobody cares.

Go watch some #Windians baseball, loser.

T. Iceman said...

It wasn't a random brag, Drew. It was a stat to show just how pathetic a loss to this shitty program would have been.

LOLZ that G$ and Drew care so much about sportsmanship. We better shake hands before every game so no one feeewings get huwt. Grow a fuckin pair. What Maryland did is no different than any other stunt that gets pulled by a team that genuinely does not like the other one.

Anonymous said...

If it's no different, then why was it a big deal? Maybe because it WAS different. Go stick a stake in a field.


GMoney said...

It's not that I'm pro-sportsmanship as much as I am unnecessary douchebaggery. There is a difference. I don't know what Penn State did to piss them off but I know MD's response and it was pure shithead.

Nothing wrong with taking the high road...especially when you suck.

GMoney said...

Wow...apparently everyone loves Iceman now.

T. Iceman said...

"If it's no different, then why was it a big deal?"

Because people today are vaginal sacks filled with estrogen, period blood and emotion. Everyone is so damn sensitive these days and take offense to the dumbest shit. And they make it a point to publicly piss and moan about shit that really isn't that big of a deal. "Ohhhhhh! They didn't shake our hands. They put a stake in our field. They called our cheerleaders fat hogs. Heavens!!! Those boys are savages!!!!" Seriously. What is the problem, Drew? Why is this such an issue for you? I'm sure in the Grumpy days teams that hated each other refused hand shakes all the time. They just didn't have a social media platform for everyone to get their Hanes Her Way all bunched up on.

From what I've seen, G$...James Franklin said they may as well shut down Maryland because they don't have a chance. He also said he doesn't consider them a rivalry despite how close the schools are to each other. This was after he was a WR coach for Maryland and was considered for the Maryland HC job.

Anonymous said...

It's not a big deal to me...I just think they looked like imbeciles and so did the Michigan players the week before with the stake. Is it so difficult for captains to shake hands? Like I said...if OSU did it I would think they looked like idiots too.


T. Iceman said...

Would you shake the hand of someone you didn't like? Like...if some guy you absolutely despised came up to you and tried shaking your hand, would you do it?

I think everyone is making such a big deal over something really small. Maryland doesn't like PSU and they stuck to their guns. More people should have conviction like that.

GMoney said...

Yeah, it's the perception of it all. It's always the second guy that gets caught or so they say and that applies here. Be the bigger man and then when you beat them on their field, run around the stadium after the game grabbing your junk and screaming like a rape victim. THAT is good trolling!

GMoney said...

If you are the team's captain, in theory, you are expected to be an honorable person/representative of the team, program, and university. Act like it. You shake the person's hand that you are to do battle against. Or at least give them a pound.

Anonymous said...

G$....well said in your last point. Also...those Maryland kids have nothing against the PSU kids...it's Franklin they were upset with. Stop acting like they truly hate each other. It's not like the two teams played against each other and fought.


Anonymous said...

Ivan Drago shook Rockys hand and told him he would break him. Just sayin.


T. Iceman said...

Aren't the players supposed to be an extension of the coaches they play for? Chances are the players feel the same way about Maryland as Franklin does.

Ivan Drago was a Russian bitch who got beat by an illiterate guido who's training regimen consisted of punching frozen meat and carrying piles of wood up a snow covered hill.

Screw theory. Our high school team captain knocked up his girlfriend and then 4 years later spent 5 years in prison for being the Pablo Escobar of northwest ohio.

GMoney said...

Aren't the players supposed to be an extension of the coaches they play for? Chances are the players feel the same way about Maryland as Franklin does.

Uhhhhhhhhh no. They embarrassed themselves and their school on Saturday and overshadowed a nice road win with their douchebaggery. FACT.

I will allow your Papa Schneids take though.

Grumpy said...

The captains shake hands before the game, period. Players shake hands after the game, period.

T. Iceman said...

At half time do they change each others tampons?

Anonymous said...

Late to the show but I remember when my dad was pissed I didnt shake the hands of THE TIM REISER. After going to the U of Toledo and hearing from his former players of his actions, I have no Respect for that guy.

Congrats Lil Strut!