|Dancing Kevin lives a "no offense" lifestyle|
Q. Pretty great season last year, eh? Now that the CBJ have gotten over some hurdles, what are your expectations for the 2014-15 season?
A. There is too much talent here not to demand another playoff appearance. The thing about hockey that is extremely underrated is chemistry. Those teams that have played together forever are always terrific because they know each other so well. People are talking up the Islanders this year just because they have a lot of good, young talent that has never played together before with their influx of veterans that they acquired. That was an issue with the CBJ the last FOREVER but it shouldn't be anymore. I'm not going to call for a playoff series win though. I just want them to show some consistency and get back to the postseason to prove that last year was not a fluke.
Q. Injuries, amirite?
A. Jesus titty-fucking Christ, this is getting absurd. 3 of our top 6 forwards are out for at least the first month and our super-stud defenseman is on IR, too. For a team notorious for starting out really slow, this is not ideal. I'm not going to go crazy though because this is why you build up an ELITE set of depth and prospects.
Q. Do you blame Joey or the team for that unnecessarily bitter contract dispute that was resolved on Monday?
A. Everyone is to blame here. The deal that was agreed to wasn't overly complex. It could have easily been done in July. But the front office and the agent were stubborn and decided to throw mud at each other in the press. Hopefully, RyJo isn't too rusty because we're going to need him to be that stud until the cavalry gets back.
Q. Which young, dumb, and full of cum kid are you looking forward to watching the most?
A. It's got to be Alexander Wennberg. This guy can't even legally drink yet but has star written all over him from everything that I've read. He and Dano and Chaput will get their chances before Boone and Dubi come back (who knows with Horton) so hopefully they make the most of it.
Q. If the Jackets are to meet your goals, then who has to be goddamn ELITE?
A. Bob. BOB has to be ELITE for us and he knows it. Fortunately, dude is about to get PAID as long as he has a great season so that should be motivation enough. He may not be in the Rask, Lundqvist, or Quick level but he is damn close.
|This is our #1 Fan by the way and everyone fucking loves him|
A. If we were healthy, I would say that finishing in the top 3 in the Metro would be the bare minimum. Now, I have to change my expectations a bit. I think that we are a wild card team again with another first round matchup with the Penguins. The worst thing that could happen is Johansen having a terrible season and everyone else getting banged up. Knowing our luck, that will definitely happen. But I will stay positive anyway...CARRY THE FLAG!
BONUS UNRELATED Q. BAL/KC and SF/STL...since your amazing World Series prediction of Washington over Detroit won one game, who wins the pennants?
A. I've got to go with the Orioles (better manager) and Cardinals (better lineup, starting pitching, and bullpen). The Giants have some weird October magic though so I am not confident on that pick. The Orioles though? Yeah, I've got them winning that one fairly easily.
Let's also pick a few football gambling lines today:
Oregon -2 @ UCLA - The Ducks aren't losing two conference games in a row
Memphis -8 vs. Houston - If you can blast UC, you can beat the Cougs by more than a TD at home
LSU -1 @ Florida - Will Muschamp ain't beating Lester
Pittsburgh +2 @ Cleveland - Every time the Browns get their fan's hopes up, they crush them swiftly and vigorously
Minnesota PK vs. Detroit - No Megatron and Teddy KGBridgewater is back? SKOL!
The MAC Glory Hole of the Week (now 4-4...shit) is Bowling Green PK @ Ohio University (not Ohio Buckeyes). The Falcons have fucked me good and deep this season but I did some research here to help make this selection. BG is 20th in the nation in pass offense while OU is 117th in pass defense. There is no rain in the forecast and little wind to screw with a solid passing attack so I feel pretty comfortable with this Glory Hole.
See? That wasn't so painful. Your one big hockey post of the year is out of the way. Now, as a warning, the NBA coverage around here is about to increase by about a billion percent so fucking give it a rest already. That's the price you pay when LeBron comes home. GO JACKETS! BEAT THE RAGS TOMORROW!