The older that I get (I graduated with Grumpy probably) the more mellow and accepting of sports outcomes I have become. It isn't about maturity either. It's that I have embraced my inner-Iceman. I KNOW that my team will fail so I temper my expectations. It is a reverse Cakes outlook on life (Allah bless him...I don't know how he does it). If you accept that they're going to blow it somehow and probably in embarrassing fashion, it doesn't necessarily lessen the blow, but at least you won't be surprised. At this stage of my life, I just SMH and roll my eyes.
Where am I going with this? Who knows! It's a bit of a rough transition but being a loser isn't always smooth sailing so I'll allow it. I'm a big fan of picking one or two shitheads off of my squadrons and blaming them for everything. Back in the day, it wasn't LeBron that kept failing for the Cavs it was goddamn Drew Gooden and his stupid hair! I will never stop hating Drew Gooden. Prime is a way better basketball player imo. So I figured that today we could all go around the commenting room and share our scapegoats. And if you are having a hard time with this, just remember that Ohio Buckeye fans are still blaming Joe Bauserman for everything.
Brian Orakpo. People seem to think that this guy is an ELITE pass rusher. I don't know why. He SUCKS. If it is possible to get negative pressure on the QB, then he does it. The Skins franchise tagged him this year because they wanted him to prove himself coming off of injury. He has .5 sacks through 6 games. One half of one sack. This guy has always been more steak than sizzle. Last year some time, I listed the most OVERRATED players in a bunch of different sports. Orakpo was left off the list because he tore his titty. Well, let me tell you, this bro is ridiculously OVERRATED. If you want to know why the Redskins are 1-5 and will probably lose to Tennessee this week, it isn't because the offense sucks. It is because they get no blindside pressure on the QB ever. Let this fucking guy walk after this most recent shitbag worthless season ends. He isn't worth it any more.
I don't know who I will blame on the Cavs but I'll just assume that Mike Miller will be a contender for that crown. I will forever loathe Mark Teixeira. And, on the ice, I don't know, I like all of the Jackets. I suppose I could point a finger at Nathan Horton's shit back. Tim Erixon kind of looks like a douche but he's playing well so I will allow it.
Let's play the blame game today. But we can't exit Stage ELITE without a trip to the Glory Hole!
This week's MAC Glory Hole of the Week (5-4!) was tough because the initial game that I liked I ended up scrapping out of fear. I initially was going to go with BG -1 vs. WMU but I'm backing off from that one. Instead, I'm going with Army -2.5 @ Kent State. Kent is 0-7, averaging 17 points per game, and can't stop the run. Army can only run the ball. Kent State is awful. I also like Akron -3.5 @ Ohio KneelandBobcats. Frank Solich is just doing a terrible job there now and I love every second of it.
That will do it for us this week. G$ is taking his spawn to her first college hockey game tonight as the RedHawks come to town to do their annual pillage and plunder of Ohio Buckeyes. It will be a nice appetizer for her first flag carrying in a few weeks. BEAT CALGARY AND OTTAWA AND OHIO BUCKEYES AND NORTHERN ILLINOIS AND TENNESSEE TITANS! That covers about everything. Any team that loses will be Orakpo and his caveman buddy's fault anyway.