Well this was another great fucking week of college football, now wasn't it? I did this post Saturday night because I left for Fort Myers early Sunday morning to drink until the announcement of Brady Hoke being fired was handed down (fingers crossed). Hopefully I didn't miss it in between black outs. So some of these late games I didn't stay up for, or didn't stay up for the entirety, since I don't care about you guys and I do this for free. Lotta action to cover today.
Michigan vs. Utah
Fire Hoke. Yet another shameful performance. Gardner sucked (again), Funchess is playing hurt and all of a sudden Michigan can't run the ball. On the Utah side Travis Wilson is lucky to be walking today. I'm glad that kid is okay but...HOLY SHIT!! Wilson was about as close as you can get to drinking his meals out of a straw for the rest of his life right before halftime. Every last player on Michigan's defense should have gotten blown at some point Saturday night for keeping them in the game. Well deserved for that performance. The D started to break down some in the second half but what the fuck do you expect when the offense is 3 and out almost every fucking possession? The only smart thing Hoke did all day was benching Gardner. Then Morris was picked on his first series. Bad, bad, bad. I'm not sure I've ever been this embarrassed by Michigan football. Fire Hoke.
Melvin Gordon III
What a fucking day by Gordon. Joey Galloway tried to steal the spot light by being a complete dip shit but Gordon was just too good. Honestly...is there anyone worse than Joey Galloway? I would rather suck on a battery while getting fucked by a lawnmower blade than listen to Galloway talk about anything. The military should use Galloway as a way to torture sensitive information out of POWs. Just awful.
Virginia Tech vs. Georgia Tech
LOL. Continues to be a quality loss to the 2-2 Fake Neck Hoakies, Ohio Buckeyes. For all of the shit Buckeye fans give Michigan fans, they're a Cincy loss away from having the same exact record as the Wolverines.
Indiana vs. Missouri
A week ago Indiana loses to a BGSU team that just got their butts turned inside out by Wisconsin this week...and this week Indiana beat a ranked ESS EEE SEE team. *sigh* I don't know, man. I'm sure Missouri will still end the year ranked and I'm sure Indiana will still finish in the bottom half of the Big 10. Good win for the conference but this is your classic case of Indiana playing its best game on a day Missouri played one of its worst. Cakes probably popped a dick vein on Saturday to the Big Ten beating the SEC. Indiana doing something the Ohio Buckeyes can't. Good for them.
So this guy might be pretty good, yeah? Let the Kenny Football nicknames start flying since everyone needs a nickname and people are rarely original these days.
LSU vs. Mississippi St.
Get Lester the Molester a 5th of toilet water to wash away the sorrow. Lesbihonest...LSU was never in this game and they were fortunate to get back in it in the 4th quarter. Maybe Mississippi St. is the TRUF like some of our esteemed preseason panel thought. Look for MSU to crack the top 20 this week. Then look for Cakes to piss and moan about it.
Clemson vs. Florida St.
True American Heroes
I can't believe those two pioneers were kicked out of the Gameday set. This game was highlighted by a plethora of outstanding sign creations before the kickoff even happened. Even Ohio Buckeye fans can appreciate what was going on with this beaut...
Even though I love Mark May and how much Ohio fans want to watch him drown in a barrel of piss, I can't ignore the excellent trolling happening here. On to the game. Jameis Winston really is the best. Dude walked onto the field in full pads to warm up like he really didn't think he was suspended. Like FSU was gonna be like, "Just kidding...you can play." LOL. This guy may honestly have a mental deficiency. So this Sean "Jerry" MaGuire guy got the start today and it was......turd soup. Every time MaGuire stepped onto the field his eyes looked like he just walked in on his dad spraying a fat load on his mom's face porn style. This one is going to hurt Clemson and their fans for awhile. So many chances just pissed away. FSU dodged a fucking bullet on this one.
That's it for today. Plenty of games to talk about...especially if Oregon LOL'ed it up against Washington. If you get time do yourself a favor and go read the ESPN article about Urban Meyer being depressed and mentally broken at Florida. For all the dung Ohio fans give Michigan for Hoke, Ol' URBZ sure sounds like a guy I want coaching my team. Someone who lets the pressure get to him so much where he feels like he's about to fucking die. Not to mention he pretty much admitted to being a drug addict and an alcoholic. LOL. Great comedy piece by ESPN. Fuck Notre Dam and fuck Larry in his stupid ass.