|Anyone who thinks that tubby Kate Upton is superior to the flawless Marisa Miller can get raped by a rhino|
Now, I know what you're thinking, why didn't he just trade days with one of the other goobers that work here? Fuck you, bro, when I have an opportunity to work the system to my advantage, I'm going to do it. Don't tell me how to do my job.
Anyway, the one very vague idea that I had for today is to treat this like an AA meeting. But instead of standing up and admitting that you are an alcoholic, be a man and confront a REAL problem. Everyone likes the sweet taste of alcohol but it takes a real man to admit that they don't like ribs or something. That's what we're going for today...personal growth and the opportunity to laugh at everyone and maybe develop a few long term LULZ such as "Ide loves Train" or "FUCK YOU CAKES". I'll go first.
Hi everyone, my name is G$, and I'm a fan of Frank Caliendo. I'm not kidding. I think he's funny and always have. On my old desktop computer, there were a ton of old Caliendo bits on there that I downloaded from LimeWire (LULZ!). Sure, he got a little overplayed throughout the years and his impressions are much better when heard not seen, but I think that he is rock solid when it comes to his impersonations. Like I said, once they dressed him up and put him on camera...yeeeesh, not good. But when he calls into Mike and Mike or whatever he is still the best. I freely admit to HATING his George W Bush impression but his Gruden is fantastic and more than makes up for it. Madden is kind of pointless in 2014 but evolving with a Mel Kiper and Sir Charles is great.
I don't care what you people think. CALIENDO IS FOREVER MUY CALIENTE!
I'm sure that there is other stuff to talk about. The NBA Lottery was last night and the Cavs left Gilbert's weiner kid at home this year ensuring no luck. UPDATE: I just spent 3 hours in the pouring rain watching a lousy game but the Cavs won the lottery AGAIN! YAY! There is actually big time talent this year! There will be another post down the road with more in DEPF analysis for how to un-fuck the luckiest shit franchise in sports. But that day is not today. I might check in later if we stop for lunch in Fuckass, IN or wherever. Behave yourselves, kiddies, and remember that Grandpa Grump is in charge until I get back.