Monday, April 14, 2014

The Fans Are Tired of Your Bullshit

Let's be honest: I am an ELITE driver.  I drive fast.  I see moves three lanes away.  I can recklessly weave through traffic and somehow make it look completely natural.  I also got a speeding ticket on Friday as I was driving home from the office.  82 in a 65.  I didn't play dumb or try to fight it.  I had to get over as my exit was approaching and my means was to pass a ton of cars and cut over.  I saw him.  Unfortunately, he saw me.  And thus, my weekend of umpiring pretty much entirely went to the Franklin County Municipal Court.  It's probably for the best anyway.  I don't need to be driving in the 80s once the kid comes.  Whatever, that state dick didn't even Carry The Flag, chicken fucker.

So yeah, that is 130 bucks that I'll never get back and is a ridiculous way to spend my money.  That got me thinking (as things usually do) about today's post.  Saturday was the Spring Game for the Ohio Buckeyes.  I have always had the stance that if you go to Spring Games then you are a fucking idiot.  I will always feel this way because it is SO STOOOOOPID.  Anyway, Ohio was charging $12 ahead of time and $20 on the day of the "game"...to watch a glorified practice...where the winners and losers don't matter at all.  Now, Ohio has always charged to attend this and that is fine and they even lie about giving the proceeds to charity (no way that that is true).  Some ELITE schools like Bama let people in for free.  Some Mickey Mouse programs like Ohio don't.  Either way is fine as long as you are clear up front and are realistic about what you are offering your most ardent supporters.

However, on Friday, it was widely reported that the Fuckeyes had only sold 36,000 tickets for the game the next day and that is really embarrassing.  So Urb and his cronies dropped the price to $5 a head as it should have always been (while pissing off the people who already paid the insane prices but apparently there was some sort of refund which is probably also a lie).  They ended up getting a little over 60,000 which is still kind of pathetic considering how nice the weather was but way better than playing your Spring Game in a stadium 1/3 full.

I'm going to do something now that I'm not used to doing: thanking Ohio Buckeye turd-sucking fans.  GOOD FOR YOU.  You shouldn't be paying 20 bucks a pop for this nothing game.  Gene Smiff and the BoT and Urb constantly steal your money and then charge more and more every year.  Enough is enough already.  At some point, even the biggest idiot (Cakes) has to ask himself, "what the fuck am I paying for"?  You're seeing something similar with the Yankees.  They play in front of 70% full stadiums every goddamn night now and it is their own fault.  They built that fucking eyesore stadium, charged a billion dollars for season tickets, priced out "the real fans", and now no one goes.  It's really sad.  But it's becoming the reality regarding the franchise-fan relationship these days.

The days of the team charging whatever the fuck they want and you the fan eating the shit are over.  We have a say now.  In FACT, we have THEE say now.  It doesn't matter how consistently good you are.  After a while, fuck it, it just isn't worth it.  HD TV and every game being televised and ELITE tailGREATs have made people start to realize how much of an expensive hassle all of this is.  Sure, you want to go to the big games still and always will but those non-con games/Astros games just don't feel like a good way to spend your time anymore.  You have other options that are more appealing and better ways to utilize your time and money.

I'm not really sure how teams can start winning fans back besides dropping ticket prices substantially (will not happen) so I think that all teams in all sports should not be surprised when attendance continues to drop more and more over the years.  In other words, you aren't building your fan base at all when you charge a family of four 80 bucks to watch the scarlet play the gray.  Get your heads out of your asses and stop trying to steal money from your biggest fans.

On a sad note regarding an ELITE way to spend your money, rumors are swirling that Minerva Park Golf Course AKA home course of the L/DFL AKA Augusta North will be closing its front ten and back eight this Summer.  It's probably Gene Smiff's fault although every time I've been out there, his brothas were all over the place in their jeans and whatnot.  I will miss Minerva.  This counts as my coverage of The Masters by the way.  If you weren't rooting for Big Dick Daddy Sping then why don't you move back to Iran, terrorist.

37 comments:

Anonymous said...

Cute troll and you made some kind of point, meanwhile UMs spring game drew a crowd of 15000 which is LOLZ. And their admission was free.

Ide

Grumpy said...

I always go to Miami's Spring Game, which is free and draws 200.

Mr. Ace said...

Michigan doesn't have any type of "game" so attendance is expected to suck. Not exactly apples to apples. But at least this one time Michigan isn't milking their fans for all their inheritance.

Randall Stevens said...

I'm proud Michigan only drew 15k. Means the fans are smart. Going to the "spring game" is pretty dumb. If you're really that interested in what your team looks like in April, watch it on TV in the comfort of your own home.

GMoney said...

Clearly, Ide and his half UNC/half Ohio education doesn't get the point. He clings to the example provided and not the actual HOT TAEK.

Stop treating your fans like a never-empty piggy bank. Eventually, they will revolt.

Now back to the Fuckeyes, it is completely unacceptable to charge what they do to watch the team play. One of these days, enough people are going to say "fuck this" but maybe I'm giving these shit-for-brains too much credit than the "none" that I usually give them. This will probably teach me a lesson in credit-giving.

Mr. Ace said...

As far as tickets/money goes I think it depends on success and scheduling. If you're consistently successful and scheduling good OOC opponents then fans are going to pay whatever you charge.

But if you aren't one of those teams then continuing to raise prices and suck is going to alienate your fans and leave you with empty seats....see; Michigan.

GMoney said...

I mean, it isn't hard. At some point, usually if you are saddled with a family, you are going to say "Ohio plays Indiana today. It's 45 degrees. It costs 40 bucks to park and traffic eats hog. Tickets are almost $100 a pop. You know what, fuck it, it's on BTN. I'm staying home."

And I'm not really sure what these teams/schools can do to change that perfectly logical line of thinking.

Jeff said...

They will go to the local blackout rule like the NFL does when games stop selling out.

GMoney said...

I'm not sure that the NCAA/conferences has that sort of clout over the networks. The Big Ten Network blacking out Big Ten games seems like a really bad idea.

Take Drooler's BROHIO tailgate sitch...why would you want to leave that for 3-4 hours to watch a boring, never-in-doubt, predictable game when you could watch three games and drink a shitload of brew-dogs???

Jeff said...

The majority of people don't go to the "Spring Game" because they care about the game. They go because it's the cheapest fan experience at the Stadium and doesn't come with all the circus that surrounds a gameday.

Families want to take their kids and sit in the stadium and watch/listen to TBDBITL without getting hit hard in the wallet and having to worry about a drunk Dut molesting their children.

$20 was too much and they fucked that up OBVZ, but Gene manned up and flat out said they charged too much.

Comparing a "Spring Game" to any game regular season game is def not exactly apples to apples.

Mr. Ace said...

Didn't the athletic office make up some BS excuse about the change in price being weather related?

GMoney said...

Oh you better believe that excuses were made.

I understand not wanting your kid to get molested by Dut. As a soon-to-be parent, that is very important. But watching a marching band be nerds is not acceptable either.

Again, all I'm saying is that constantly jacking up/off the prices of your tickets whether the games matter or not is eventually going to alienate your fans. Ohio is an example. They are not the only one (which is why I mentioned the Yankees and their attendance issues despite being the GOAT franchise in all of sports).

GMoney said...

By the way, umped a DH yesterday in Dublin with some all star team from Wood County coming down for the day. They had a bunch of kids from AW. I asked them about Cakes. All of their replies were "what do you want to know about that bitch faggot" or "worst Twitter follow ever". Smart kids, I tell ya.

Anonymous said...

Jeff brings the best points to the table....but, I'm not giving Smiff points for "manning up".

The $12/$20 ticket pricing was completely ridiculous. I've got zero problems with them charging $5...but, as Jeff noted...the attraction is supposed to be that it's a cheap opportunity to take in an event inside the Horseshoe on a nice Spring day. The original moronic ticket prices took that away.

Also, G$'s point that Urban was behind the pricing is possibly dumber than Smiff's original pricing. Urban's mind is always thinking recruiting...80-90K in a stadium for a glorified scrimmage is way more attractive than 36K. I GUARANSHEED that he told Smiff he needed to shove that idea and make them cheaper. He's always said that he wants 100K in the Shoe for a Spring Game at some point...and that would never happen with this dumb prices OBVZ.

Randall doesn't like spring games and has no use for recruiting...what a college football fan he is.

--Drew

GMoney said...

I just assumed that Urban makes all the decisions since he needs to keep stocking up his bankroll to pay players. Apparently, this OVERRATED coach has lost control of his program OBVZ.

When will he win another game by the way?

Man, I can not wait for Ide's Dragon Party today.

Prime99 said...

As a former ticket office manager I can tell you the coaches typically have zero to do with prices. They want them as highas possible but they don't set them. Neither does the ticket office. Probably a combo between AD and finance department, maybe marketing for various promo discounts.

Those people overestimate their brand (at all levels of colleges) and will bleed you of every cent they can. Guaranteed. If they can't, they lower the price for "community relations." It's a fucking shitty game to play and I'm glad I'm out.

Randall Stevens said...

LOL Drooler. Just because I don't tailgate spring games or don't know the underwear size of everyone in the incoming freshman class makes me less of a fan. I can like the game and be a fan without being a rabid doucher about the spring game and recruiting.

GMoney said...

Rabid doucher = apparently Broxton Milner who likes to play Twitter fun with WE ON fans because they have better ways to spend their time/don't blindly support a rape culture

Urban Meyer sets the prices for everything in central Ohio much like he sets the tone on that current two game losing streak.

Randall Stevens said...

In URBZ defense, Ohio wouldn't be on a 2 game losing streak if they played Ohio football in those games.

Anonymous said...

LOLZ @ Randall...probably can't even name ten players on Michigan's current team.

G$...Michigan has a rape culture now too. Gibbons/Lewan....#NeverForget.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

DRAGONS TALK

If only Randalls wedding had this ending, it would have been memorable. But first...

Ramsay Snow is the man. Hunting down a poor girl with the hounds while having a dickless Reek and some crackshot whore tagging along is a pretty ELITE way to spend an afternoon. I have never liked Theon more than I do now. Great work by the bastard.

Stannis and the ginger are spending their usual first scene of the season with burning some people. The pay off to all of these scenes will be great, but fuck if it's not boring to watch. Davos is still the greatest.

Hodor.

Bran really did some solid work here. This was great because him touching the heart tree was completely different from in the book. Nothing really of use except for the fact that George RR wrote the episode, so all of his visions were TEASERS FOR FUTURE BOOKS. Dragons descending on Kings Landing, roofs ripped off of the throne room, and the long awaited winter has come. HOLY SHIT THAT WAS GREAT!

With those few asides, the entire episode was all #KingsLanding. I love that in the time Bronn has been there, he has managed to pilfer every whore and has now started working his way up the wives chain. Jamie is TOTES a bitch now though.

Red Viper has just (really gay) brass balls. I like to think that Oberyn is gay because he just gives zero fucks and not that he actually likes it. Going up to Tywin and basically making him look like a bitch while holding Cersei's other inbred kid over her head was great.

All the exchanges in this scene were great. Cersei and Brienne, Jamie and Loras (lol), Tyrion and Shae, Olenna and everyone, because she is awesome.

The episode did a great job doing what the book did: letting you know just how much an insufferable cunt Joffrey is. Chopping up Tyrions book, throwing money at the band, and that insane dwarf show really set the tone. I really wanted to see his statue though. In the end, he gave the people what they wanted, him choking the fuck out and dying.

This leaves the Westeros version of "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" Clearly, Tyrion is fucked for reals, but, if you were paying attention, there were tons of pissed off/anxious faces in the crowd. Cersei gets to be super depressed for a while, and that's always fun, and there will be plenty of vengeance to be had.

Now everyone must bow to KING TOMMEN. The boy that they showed laughing for like 3 shots. They had to wedge him in somehow!

This does suck, because Joffrey was great. He was always good for a boss scene of douchebaggery. Now, without him, there really isn't anyone to root hard against except for maybe Cersei. I'd lean towards Ramsay Snow, but I REALLY hated Theon, so he's ok in my book. Arya's list has now gotten shorter in two consecutive episodes.

Ide

Randall Stevens said...

LOL Droucher.

Me: I'm a college football fan.

Droucher: NUH UH! PROOOOOOVE IT!!

Just because I don't jack off to recruiting and the spring game like some other losers here do, doesn't mean I don't keep up on the team I cheer for.

By the way: watched Naked and Afraid last night for the first time. Meh. It's Survivor in a one hour show with no clothes and no cash prize. It wasn't anything overly exciting.

Prime99 said...

Tyrion needs Johnny Cochran stat! If the suspect's an imp, you must aquit- or something like that. There was a major clue as to who done it, but why spoil the fun? Funny that Joffrey died, and that's all that matters.

Overall, great episode. I read a review that likened tyrion's speech to Shae to John Lithgow's speech to Harry in Harry and the Hendersons. LOL

Anonymous said...

Anything RS can do to further his standing as a Walmart Wolverine, he does. He can't name you 10 players, but boy howdy, if he can't cheer for them on gameday!

Yet, he can in fact name almost everyone on the Cleveland Browns, Detroit Pistons, and Detroit Shock.

Ide

Anonymous said...

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you don't find out who did it until MUCH later, right Prime? Like in TV terms, it would be next season sometime. I could be off on that, but I do remember it being way later after all the subsequent shit had hit the fan.

Ide

Prime99 said...

I'm not certain the Lannisters even know who did it in the books yet. It's been a while since I read DWD, but I want to say Sansa finds out and that's how we know? I'm hazy on that, though.

I do wish Stone Cold Steve Austin was behind it, though. He could come out in Season 6 with the band of minstrels from the wedding (Sigur Ros) playing his theme music, claim that he poisoned Joffrey, DTA don't trust anyone, stunner Cersei, drink some Stevweisers, and leave. I like that option.

Anonymous said...

Good point Ide. Randall thinks college football fans that follow recruiting and enjoy their spring games are losers....but, he'll be the first to start handing out Michigan's Annual September Heismans. Turrible.

--Drew

GMoney said...

Drool, I was referencing Michigan's rape culture considering that, you know, for all of Ohio's faults supporting rapists isn't one of them. Speaking of which, Jimmy Frank brought in 72K for their Spring game. That is so pathetic.

I'm OK with following recruiting. It isn't for me and never will be. I prefer different ways to waste my life, but I understand. Looking foward to Spring football/Spring game makes you a loser MOS DEF.

Same thing with N&A. Nothing really happens but it is not something that I could ever do and watching people almost die for no reason at all is a real hoot to me.

GMoney said...

Steve Austin killing Joffrey would be the greatest thing to ever happen to TV. BEST THEORY EVER.

Man, that was an ELITE episode. For all of Ide's many awful faults, covering Thrones is one of his redeeming qualities. Excellent work.

OBVZ that frontrunner for killing the King is Oberyn Martell but I think that it might have been The Model Rick Martel. Count it.

I'm a fan of old lady Tyrell but she really has to stop referencing her old lady poops. More witty banter with Tywin please. They so gonna fuck.

Been a really enjoyable season thus far. Knock on wood but so far there haven't been any worthless scenes outside of everything featuring lardass Samwell Tarly.

Anonymous said...

G$...got ya...thought the rape culture thing was due to PSU's 72K day.

I recorded two N&A episodes last night. I like the show for the same reasons you do. If for some reason I was forced to go on that show...here's what I would do.

Get dropped off by the helicopter nude in the jungle. Walk very gingerly to the site where I meet the naked girl. Then I'd give her a good look over...maybe attempt a hug to get a feel depending on hotness level...and then I'd quit and tell them to bring the copter back. Depending on what country I'm in, I may already have reservations at some all-inclusive resort after they pick me up...just so that I can LOLZ all day long while drinking and eating like a king and thinking about how my replacement was faring.

--Drew

Prime99 said...

G$, I'd also like to give a shout out to Carlos Beltran for his ELITE 2 run HR that won me my fantasy match up this week. Solid AB, dawg!

Mr. Ace said...

I follow recruiting a bit because I frequent Mgoblog. That website is one of the main reasons why I stay up to date on all things Michigan. It's fantastic. I wish the Eagles had something comparable...instead I have to skim through Bleeding Green Nation and it's awful. I don't jerk it to recruiting...but I do look forward to watching the spring game just to see some of the hyped guys, like Freddie Canteen for Michigan this year.

Bragging about knowing player names is pretty cool, I guess.

GMoney said...

Thanks? Taking 3 of 4 from the paper champion Grogstas is always ELITE. Even as he gets older, Beltran is still incredible.

Anonymous said...

Ape....Canteen's been getting a lot of hype. Sounds like Hoke may have found a good sleeper in him. Always nice an early enrollee starts getting a buzz for making plays.

--Drew

GMoney said...

LOL at Michigan relying on Canteen Boy. Hopefully he catches passes as well as he catches sexual advances from Alec Baldwin.

/ELITE SNL reference

Prime99 said...

"My beard is scratchy... But it gives good back rubs."

Randall Stevens said...

There Ide goes again with his stellar reading skills. Show me where I admitted I don't know 10 players names. Reading is hard when your head is placed firmly in your rectum.