|Written by a nubian princess!|
OK, so we all know that Ide owed Randall and Dut a rib dinner to be cashed in this past weekend (which Dut didn't show up to because he would rather go hungry than deal with Ide which makes a lot of sense). So we're all hob-knobbing around my ELITE varsity jacket during cocktail hour when it becomes very apparent that Ide isn't there. We got a good chortle out of just another in a long line of Ide lies and how this Lannister does not pay his debts. Texts went unanswered. In the end, we realized that his presence just would have depressed everyone anyway.
So Drew leaves before dinner to go to a birthday party at Chuck E Cheese or whatever thus he missed out on the worst server of all time. The Cakes/Iceman end of the table got their entrees before the way sexier G$/Ape/Grump/Jeff end even ordered our wings/balls. Whatever. The food was good although the ribs were a little tougher than I expect from a BBQ joint. I think it was the hostess who came over while we were finishing up with a note. She was black which made this all better. Yep, Ide wasn't coming but he paid for ALL OF OUR MEALS (as you can see from the note above). We were on our own for tip and drinks, but the food was on James Earl Ray Junior.
You know, I'm not in the business of complimenting total shitheads, but this was a BALLER MOVE. I don't even care why your plans fell through. That is how you make everyone forgive you for your constant stream of lies! Well done, Ide, and just know that this will not be forgotten when it comes time to voting for the 2014 Commenter of the Year. Yes, the award can be bought.
All in all, a good time but laid back and not too eventful. We carried the flag and everyone went on their way. Until next year, gentlemen, when many of us have newborns that we need to escape! EXCELSIOR!
I just have a few short topics to address today. Not much in terms of heavy lifting because I'm hungover and still in shock from our worst being overtly generous. Why yes, I did tell She$ that my hangover yesterday was probably worse than all of her morning sickness combined.
Phil Jackson joining the Knicks front office - I have no idea why this was the story of the weekend. Dude is a coach. He isn't a scout or a talent evaluator. I do want to take this time to chide the morons that think that Phil Jackson is OVERRATED. No, he is not. 11 titles is 11 titles, bruh. But I look forward to this disaster organization paying huge money to someone not even remotely qualified and still being awful. Should be fun!
LeBron came back!!! - I didn't see any highlights from the Big Z number retirement on Saturday night. Seal, I would like a full report on the evening's festivities. Basically, how OBVZ was it that LeBron is dying to come back ASAP. I'd bet that it was TOTES OBVZ.
I can't believe that I'm going to write this, but... - Joakim Noah should be getting way more MVP consideration than he is. He is carrying that average Bulls team. More important to them than Rose. Yeah, ya heard me!
Aaron Craft played his last homo game - Whatever. Shitbag Ted Valentine let him get away with two fouls on the last two possessions because shitbags gotta stick together. They still aren't going to win anything this month and no one that matters will ever remember Craft. We always hear legendary tales of Byron Mullens and KoKo around here. Craft will be forgotten outside of the men's room wall at all central Ohio gay bars. Way to be the heart and soul of the worst Ohio Buckeye basketball team of the last 8-10 years. Yes, the NIT team was better than this blob of bricks and shit.
That will do it for today. Plenty to talk about. Again, it's always an enjoyable time to meet up with you Darren Sharper clones every once in awhile. Since one of us may or may not be moving to Urban Meyer's old stomping grounds this Summer, Cakes and I were talking about maybe putting something together up in BG (Myles Pizza, BRAH!) before he rolls down south. Cakes sucks. For Life.