Monday, March 03, 2014

More Played Out Than The Wave

"Meet Virginia" is Ide's favorite song.  I DON'T REALLY WANNA BE A QUEEN!
Now that football season is over, I direct more of my ELITE focus on the game of basketball.  Specifically, I watch more of the college game as I'm sure that many of you do as well.  In case you hadn't noticed, this is shaping up to be a pretty wild NCAA Tournament.  Nobody seems to be great and everyone is beatable.  Again, EVERYONE is beatable.  Which leads me to today's realization that I am pretty much an old man: storming the floor needs to stop because no one understands the time or the place for it anymore.

Over the past 4 days alone, we have seen:
*Penn State storm after beating #22 Ohio
*Utah Valley State storm after beating extremely unranked New Mexico State for some reason and starting a massive, ugly brawl
*#12 Virginia stormed after crushing #4 Syracuse (which I wasn't upset with since it clinched their first ACC title in 30+ years and Jim Boeheim is an asshole)
*Oklahoma State, the biggest train wreck team of the year and once ranked in the top ten, stormed after beating #5 Kansas
*Horrible Souf Carolina stormed after beating OVERRATED Kentucky

These all happened in one weekend (extended) and there were probably more.  Add in the FACT that ELITE programs like Indiana and North Carolina feel like they should be running out onto the floor even though you are supposed to win all of your home games and there is a problem here.  I don't even want to talk about how Ohio Bobcat rubes rush the floor at least five times per year because that is what idiot hayseeds do.  The game at Utah Valley State the other night only STREMPHened my position. It's time to ban the fans from the floor for good.

They don't need to be out there.  You don't have to be on the court to celebrate a great victory.  Have we all forgotten Ape's rules?  Just because you beat a higher ranked team than your own by 6-8 points does not give you the right to embarrass yourself.  And you ARE EMBARRASSING YOURSELVES.  Let's be honest here, most of the backwards hat BRAHS that run out there aren't out there to jump around with their team.  They are hoping to get in the face of the losing players and yell BRAH shit in their face.  I'm actually more surprised that more punches aren't thrown during these played out scenes.  It's dangerous.  I don't like to sound like some paranoid woman but it is.

I'm not really sure how you curtail this garbage.  Security at college sporting events is always horrible.  I guess that maybe you could levy fines down on offenders.  Maybe something like if your fans rush the floor, your basketball program (not the athletic department) is fined 50,000 dollars.  And that money goes directly into the budget of your opponent.  Why?  Because FUCK YOU COLLEGE KIDS.  Quit acting like cocksuckers and behave like you actually expected to win a home game.  Schools have moved students near the floor to create a hostile environment.  It is a privilege to sit there.  If you can't be trusted, take that shit away.  Make the students sit up in the nosebleeds for a few games.  FUCK 'EM.

I used to be OK with court stormings but not anymore.  They're cliche.  They're lame.  Most of the time, they are nonsensical.  We used to see just a few per year.  Now we're seeing a handful per Saturday.  Get rid of it.  It serves no purpose and you're only going to see more fan/player violence when some troll BRAH tries to make a funny and be a tough guy.

For as lame as student sections rushing the floor are, nothing is worse than when a random Cavs fan just walks out onto the floor during game play to do...something.  It happened again on Friday during the Cavs thrashing of Trey Burke Sucks.  For the third time in less than a season, some weirdo did a self-storm (nice security, Danny Gilbert).  The first time, if you recall, was some bro telling LeBron to come back home.  The second time was a bruh asking Kyrie to stay.  Friday, some chach tried to hug Irving and said "I (or we) love you, Kyrie".  It was not Jason Collins or so I'm told.  STOP IT.  This is fucking embarrassing.  It makes all of us look like shit.  Not only are we Cavs fans fucking losers for rooting for the Cavs, but we are desperate and pathetic that going to jail and being banned from the arena for life is better than losing a player.  That's awful.  Those three shitheads should be killed.

So the point of today's post is simple: STAY OFF THE FUCKING FLOOR.  You all have ruined it for everyone with your blatant disregard for the rules.  Also, Ide loves Train (the band and the act of numerous black men ramming his b-hole)


Randall Stevens said...

I've always wondered how an organization bans someone for life. There's no possible way to police that. That has always been an empty threat in my opinion.

I really couldn't care less about court storming. Fans get caught up in the moment and I'm not going to hate them for that.

GMoney said...

But these moments don't make sense anymore. Beating a better team in a tight game but you end up winning 6-8 points doesn't mean that you should be so overcome by emotion that you lose control of your senses. It's an unexpected win. That's it. Stay in your goddamn seat.

Buzzer beater...I get that. Those are ELITE. Anything less and you should be able to control yourself.

I'm actually more surprised that we don't see more violence between player that just lost and douche BRAH.

GMoney said...

What's really important to note here is that loser Drew didn't show up on Tinder last night to take his medicine after getting Crean Pied.

Anonymous said...

I said the same thing this past weekend... how has an opposing player not knocked out a douchebag student that rushed the floor yet?

I agree with you, completely get rid of it. Its so ridiculous now and 95% of the time that people are storming, the situation doesnt warrant a storm. I guess im old as well because I think its just immature kids looking for a reason to jump up and down on the floor.

Obviously a $25,000 fine to the school doesnt work in the SEC, as Souf Carolina stormed.

I'll take that UK is overrated when you wrote this, but you cant say that as of this afternoon when they arent ranked anymore. They are not good... and when a team is not good, they can't be overrated. If any of you put them in the sweet 16 in your brackets, you are dumber than Grumpy.

Shaping up to be a very good tourny.


GMoney said...

I'm not sure how good it will be, but it will be wild.

I actually like my idea of taking the students off of the floor seats if they can't be trusted. That's a harsh punishment right meow. Get the blue hairs down there with the big head signs. That should be good for some excellent LULZ.

Nibbles said...

Ide should be happy this morning. "12 Years A Slave" won best picture at Oscar.

Logically, the next step in all of this is for fans to storm hockey rinks.

Grumpy said...

At Utah Valley State it was more like students were going to knock out a New Mexico State player. At least two easily identifiable students were throwing punches.

It is the responsibility of the home team to insure that the visiting team and staff get off the floor safely. Make it a rule, backed up with heavy fines, that until the visitors are off the floor, nobody is allowed on the court.

Mr. Ace said...

Unrighteous stormings are the worst. I don't like completely banning them because righteous storms are one of the great things in sports. But we might be at that point.

The issue with moving students back is that it hurts the home team. They put loud students next to the court for a reason. Moving them back lessens their impact on the game and makes it more likely that they won't show up.

Tourney is all about matchups. Can't really count any team out until you see the bracket.

GMoney said...

Yeah, I know why those mormons were out there thirsting for blood. That doesn't happen if that genius NMSU player doesn't hilariously launch a basketball at the other kid. But still, that isn't their pound of flesh to seek.

Anonymous said...

G$....You didn't see me on Tinder, because I was on Grinder.

That kid with the bandana in the NMSU game should have had his teeth knocked in.

Cavs fans are creepy...which isn't surprising since they need THE DIFF.

I'm with Randall...don't really give a shit about the court stormings. Kids are just having fun....whatevs.


Jeff said...

In light of G$'s facebook pic over the weekend, are we wearing letterman jackets to ribfest? Can't think of a more BRAH thing to do!

GMoney said...

The older that I get, the less I want frat bros to have fun at a hoops game.

Varsity jackets are comin' back, yo!

I would love to get in the head of the random Cavs fan trespassers and find out what their goal was. Because this is the dumbest thing ever. I mean, do you really want to do what Shooter did in Hoosiers? At least he was drunk and screaming at the refs.

Anonymous said...

Is Utah Valley State even a real place? Gotta be honest, never heard of Utah Valley State before this.


GMoney said...

ZOMBIE TIME. No exclamation points anymore until business picks up. We're halfway through the second half and NOTHING IS HAPPENING. Let's slog through this mess again:

*The episode title was "Still" and that was really fitting because why are we still not doing anything. I would have called it "Still???".

*So we got an entire hour of Daryl and Beth talking and making odd decisions. It seems wrong to complain about a Daryl-heavy episode, but this was more boring than a CBS sitcom.

*Beth, who has never had a drop of alcohol, all of a sudden is so overcome with withdrawal shakes apparently that she wants to sacrifice it all for some peach schnapps. This was the story of the night. Beth is an addict whose only hope is a bottle of hooch.

*They go to a country club which was fun because we got to see Daryl tee off on some zombies. You know that those zombies were probably elitist assholes anyway which made it doubly satisfying. I have no idea why Daryl was grabbing the stacks of money though. Not a lot of Bass Pro Shops still around to re-upp his arrow supply.

*Daryl won't let Beth pop her drunk cherry on Schnapps which is correct. Gives her some 'shine instead that they found at some busted up shack.

*Beth becomes a drinking pro immediately (LOL yeah right) and wants to play drinking games. We learned more about Daryl here and he got mad about thinking on his past.

*I don't know what Beth's end game here was. It's pretty OBVZ to all that Daryl had a shitty childhood and did everything on his own. Was she expecting to find out that he was the CEO of a Fortune 500 company? Daryl got pissed and started breaking shit because he is a mean drunk.

*They make up but don't fuck and decide to burn the house down for some reason. It looked like a monster forest fire was going to start soon as well.

*Again, nothing happened. This was a terrible hour of my life.

Feel free to discuss the far superior True Detective as we now know who the spaghetti monster is and McConnaughey's Oscar speech last night was ELITE.

Randall Stevens said...

In real life, true back woods Georgia moonshine puts "no booze beth" in a coma after half a bottle. The idea of her slugging through multiple glasses of that shit without even barfing was a very LOL worthy moment for me.

I was praying Beth's first real drink would be rumplemintz. Or fireball whiskey.

There was nothing good about this episode. The only thing that came close was Beth finally getting the nads to call out Daryl for being a prick all the time since the prison. Dude was being a real asshole and needed to be checked.

Hey! Great idea! Let's get loaded on shine and burn down the only shelter we have within miles from anything else in the middle of the night with walkers all over the woods. Genius plan.

Beth holding off a pretty aggressive walker with one hand in the golf shop while getting her knife was impossible to believe. Apparently her quest for booze has given her the STREMPH of 1,000 Spartan warriors.

This episode was shit. Top to bottom. Something cool better happen very soon.

Randall Stevens said...

And one more real life in that environment there's no possible way that scenario ends in anything else than Beth getting plowed by Daryl.

As far as those two know, they're the only survivors and hope is almost completely gone. They're loaded, alone and in a cabin in the middle of nowhere. Unless Daryl is gay, has zero game or finds Beth utterly repulsive, she no question gets railed.

GMoney said...

The one bad ass thing from last night was Daryl gnawing on a rattlesnake.

From the previews, it looks like we have more nonsense next week as they only showed Daryl/Beth and the Maggie clan fighting The Mist. CAN'T WAIT!

Thank God for True Detective giving me a reason to live on Sunday nights.

GMoney said...

How about last night's weather DOOM? 6-12 inches overnight! OH LORDY! I don't know if I'll be able to handle the ZERO inches of show that we got instead.

Prime99 said...

TWD was pretty boring, as mentioned. I'm all for character development, but splitting the group up and rotating episodes seems to make the show significantly worse.

The biggest problem is that their mission was dangerous and pointless. I get that they feel hopeless, but Beth couldn't even score a sweet golf sweater without it being ruined!

Move this shit along!

Anonymous said...

I gave up on TWD. Fuck that show. I'll be back for Dragon Talk (1 month!).

TD was ELITE but with one episode left all we got was a set up episode. Maybe it could have been better, but there is ZERO chance that this week isn't going to be batshit.

Court storming is OK on David/Goliath wins, home title clinching games (regardless of school), and important (basically previous examples with few exceptions) buzzer beaters.


GMoney said...

I hope that Daryl drinks four bottles of Rumplemintzzzzz and then crossbows your ass to death for disrespecting his honor.