|TREMENDOUS UPSIDE POTENTIAL!!!|
Anyway, the conference tournaments have gotten underway and this is a very underrated weekend itself. You could probably make a case that this is BETTER than next weekend since wins this weekend give you bragging rights for the next 365. I mean, if WE ON wins the Big Ten and sweeps the conference this year, they’re going to enjoy that a hell of a lot more than beating Norfolk State and UNLV next weekend. But I digress. I figured that I would spend today getting everyone’s mindgrapes right and unloading a conference tournament primer for this weekend. It will help get everybody’s juices flowing so that next week we will all be prepared to start our quest toward Warren Buffett’s billion dollars! Let’s investigate the big 8 conferences in which you could easily see Final Four teams coming from:
Where is the tournament? Greensboro, NC
Who are the high seeds? Virginia (one), Syracuse, Duke, North Carolina
Is this usually fun to watch? Not really. Dick Vitale’s voice always gets strained and he is whisper screaming. Plus, there are always a ton of upsets which leads to some boring team like Florida State playing in the finals
What question needs to be answered? Is Virginia for real and should we, the public, be taking them seriously?
Where is the tournament? Memphis
Who are the high seeds? Cincinnati (one) and Louisville
Is this usually fun to watch? I have no fucking clue since this is the first tournament for this conference as currently constructed
What question needs to be answered? Is Louisville primed to make another title run? I don’t buy Cincinnati at all since they struggle to score so it is the Cards or bust out of the American (solid conference IMO).
Where is the tournament? Brooklyn…fuck you, Ide.
Who are the high seeds? Saint Louis and VCU
Is this usually fun to watch? I always enjoy watching the A-10 championship game on Sunday because Verne and Bill do it and either team is capable of an upset or two.
What question needs to be answered? Fuck if I know…How gay is Ide? If you're a black man at his gym...VERY!
Where is the tournament? The Garden
Who are the high seeds? Villanova, Creighton, and Xavier
Is this usually fun to watch? You’re damn right it is. OBVZ, this conference is not what it used to be but the Catholic schools that remain can still play some entertaining ball. And if for some reason we get the top two seeds playing for the title, Doug McDermott averages about a thousand points per game vs. Nova this year.
What question needs to be answered? Is Villanova really worthy of a one seed and can any of these teams make it to the sweet sixteen? UPDATE: LESLIE KNOPE!
Where is the tournament? Indianapolis…home of Charles Mulligan’s Steakhouse
Who are the high seeds? WE ON, Bo Ryan and the Klan, and Sparty
Is this usually fun to watch? Not really. The Big Ten isn’t known for its high-flyers. You get more possession grinding in this league and an especially high lot of that when you’re playing three games in three days.
What question needs to be answered? Are any of these teams actually any good? That’s the weird thing about the conference this season: everyone has HUGE flaws. I mean, WE ON won the regular season title EASILY without their best player. How is that possible? Nebraska is the goddamn four seed!
Where is the tournament? Kansas City
Who are the high seeds? Kansas
Is this usually fun to watch? Nope. This is a Fran Fraschilla Fest and unless he is breaking down foreigners on draft night, he puts me to sleep.
What question needs to be answered? How fucked is Kansas without Joel Embiid? I’d bet a sizable amount that they don’t win this weekend. I wouldn’t mind seeing a little run by Marcus Smart and the Pokes since he seems to be a stable gentleman when the pressure rises.
Where is the tournament? Las Vegas
Who are the high seeds? Arizona, UCLA, and Arizona State
Is this usually fun to watch? Absolutely. This tournament always seems ripe with upsets and buzzer beaters.
What question needs to be answered? Does Zona have their shit together? They SHOULD come out of the West in two weeks just based on talent and coaching alone. But they haven’t been right since Brandon Ashley got hurt and they have no DEPF.
Where is the tournament? Atlanta
Who are the high seeds? Florida and Kentucky
Is this usually fun to watch? Not at all unless Marshall Henderson is doing a lot of Marshall Henderson things
What question needs to be answered? Can anyone beat Florida over the next month? This is a two team league and even that second team isn’t one that you can count on. The Gators shouldn’t play anyone within single digits this weekend. They probably shouldn’t until the Final Four.
I hope that that helped or at least got your mind where it belongs. It’s March, jerks, so start showing some respect. I’m not doing anything this weekend but laying on the couch and watching a fuck-ton of hoops, I cannot wait. This is also the time of year where Damman questions whether he should continue his March Madness NUT Pool. You’re doing it. You have nothing else important to do. DEAL WITH IT. Enjoy the basketball and we’ll be back on Monday to look at the brackets and predict who is going to RISE TO THE OCCASION and who is going to John Thompson III.