Friday, February 28, 2014

The Big Ten Loves Money, Hates Kids

High School Football Forever
As I mentioned yesterday in the comments, I really wanted to attack the whole N-word debate today with my usual flair and panache but Ape did a great job on his own.  Now, I didn't read it very closely but I assume that his message was that he isn't racist because he has black friends and a color TV.  Close enough?  Basically, I am just really looking forward to Jerome Booger calling a pinnilly for "Illegal N***er Usage" this season.  I can't wait for that.

Anyway, this left me scrambling for a post today.  So I did a little bit of digging and found that Jim Delany and the Big Ten are back to being greedy shitheels again.  What the fuck else is new?  In their never-ending conquest to milk every penny out of everyone, their new rumored idea is to make Friday night their own football night.  Are you ready Big Ten Football Friday Night?  Of course you aren't because it's a stupid idea.

Look, bros, college football is played on Saturday.  We all love our November weeknight MACtion but that is an outlier.  Boise State and other schools in that area like to play on Fridays for the exposure.  Why?  Because the little guys need all the exposure that they can get.  And that makes sense.  Why a conference with their own fucking network, a heavy fill of games on ESPN, and EVERY game televised feels the need to do this, I do not know.

I understand that this might not matter much to any of you readers here (due to your age and most of you not having bastards yet), but in Ohio, Friday is for high school football.  Period.  Dan Cummins confirms this.  And when you play college games on Friday nights, congrats on wasting an opportunity to recruit and pissing off most people.  If you think that the Big Ten would just stuff a fuckload of Indiana games on Friday, you will be sadly mistaken.  Every team would be required to play on at least one Friday night over the course of the season.  THIS IS FUCKING STUPID.

Again, this is the midwest and you don't play college football games on high school football nights.  I'm sure that there will be some losers here that think that this is NBD, but they are wrong as usual (looking at you, Drew).  This is such an obvious cash grab attempt by the conference without any regard for what the schools and fans actually want.  Hell, most of these schools have a hard enough time filling up their shitty stadiums. It just amazes me to see how much Delany cares about cash money over what is best for the league.  I'm still LOLing at Maryland and Rutgers.  How about making decisions based on quality and not TV markets?  That's your #1 goddamn problem right there.

Big Ten fans (especially Ohio Buckeye turd suckers) always cry about haters and not getting any respect.  If you start playing games on Friday nights, there will be absolutely zero reason for the haters to ever stop hating.  This would only confirm that the conference is a joke.

Before we go, I feel like talking about RibFest next Saturday.  Secretary of State Grumpy is on top of the reservation.  We want to eat (Barley's) at 6 pm and COCKtail hour will begin there at 5.  How about we start getting a head count?  I know that Damman is out this year (acceptable reason) but I demand some new blood at the table.  Also, does anyone have an idea on something groin-grabbingly good to do after ribs?  I'll always recommend Private Dancer.  One more week, BRAHS, so let us know if you are in or out.  Don't be a pussy either--if you only comment sparingly or just read, you are more than welcome to break pig bones with some of the commenting legends.

40 comments:

Grumpy said...

This Friday night idea has been raised before and it was stupid then and stupid now. Friday night high school football should be sacrosanct. CLEAR EYES, FULL HEARTS, CAN'T LOSE.

Made reservations for 10 at RibFest, but I can always change it. I counted G$, Ace, Dut, Jeff, Randall, Ide, Cakes and me, leaving 2 spaces for unexpected guests, like Drew realizing we're more important than his tony wine tasting. If you're not on that list but want to break bread with the ELITE, speak up.

Mr. Ace said...

If they were putting on legit high profile games...like a Sparty vs Wiscy level... consistently I wouldn't have much of a problem. But they won't because the B1G sucks.

But I don't think you can ask college football teams to give a fuck about high school football night when there is likely another multi million dollar carrot hanging in front of them.

Mr. Ace said...

And I will obvs be in attendance. Hopefully we can get Larry/Lange/Nate B to show up for ribfest. Maybe the senator will make a surprise appearance... doubtful since he is big timing the common folk.

Randall Stevens said...

Friday football doesn't bother me. It means there's guaranteed football on another day during the week.

I'm a firm yes for RibFest. I can't pass on Ide paying out ribs because he had faith in a team that was swept by Penn State. I may have 2 others tagging along with me that day.

Nate said...

I might be able to tag along. Not sure just yet.

Nate said...

As Ace mentioned - BIG won't put high profile games on Friday, so nobody's going to change the channel from ONN to see Maryland vs. Indiana.

Plus, most attendees at high school games are one of the following:

-Family of Player
-Former family of player who has grown so attached to team, that they still come
-Students looking to come to game to socialize

None of these demographs are going to change their plans on Friday night.

GMoney said...

You should give a fuck about high school football since, you know, they stock your program. Hell, ask fucking Urb how important it is to get kids on the sidelines for gamedays. It is ALL he talks about.

You can't play Friday night college football in Pennsylvania or Ohio. You just can't.

And why are they so NIGGARDLY about more money? From what I can tell, the network cash hasn't done much to increase the profile of this awful conference. #realtalk

Jeff said...

I'll be derrr.

Someone should probably let the Jackets know the Olympic break is over. Oooof.

Good thing CBB doesn't start til tomorrow since it's not March yet. Right?!?!?!

Anonymous said...

That loss to PSU last night blew balls.

I'll be there for cocktail hour.

I Nate mentioned...zero fucks would be given by me if Indiana and Maryland played on Friday nights. Don't really care about the topic, but agree that Fridays should probably be left alone.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

Ribfest is a no go for me..... I get to work Saturday and Sunday.

How bout them Tar Heels?

Speaking of high school football.... John Snoad is the worst.

----Lange

GMoney said...

Speaking of high school football.... John Snoad is the worst.

What's the update on his job status? I thought that I heard New Albany coordinator.

Drew, you will care when you have to play Rutgers on a Friday night and are not given your usual proper 6 hours of Brohio tailgate time, bro!

The Jackets really put on a shitty defense clinic last night. I'll give them a mulligan but they are not permitted to lose to any more teams that are clearly worse than them. I get the feeling that we are only competing with Philly (who got slaughtered last night).

Anonymous said...

I was only coming if I could sit by Drew at dinner... since he isnt going to be there for the night, Im not gonna make it. Im sure you all are heartbroken.

Seal

Mr. Ace said...

We will always have FacePrime.

Prime99 said...

Going to have to clear my schedule for some FacePrime! Maybe I'll play a Train song dedicated to Ide. Or answer in blackface for Ace (cool, because I have a few black friends.) who knows?!

Friday nights is a bad idea for the reasons pointed out. It stinks and I don't like it.

Nibbles said...

"What's the update on his job status? I thought that I heard New Albany coordinator."


First I've heard of that. He's not suited for a coordinator position. Not an X's and O's guy, definitely more of an administrator. Probably will end up head coach of a D3 or D4 school within Central Ohio.


GMoney said...

Unemployed sounds about right.

No Seal? I don't like the sound of that.

BlackFacePrime sounds like a winning combo to me.

GMoney said...

Since Ape left the fantasy baseball league over the winter, please welcome the venerable CAKES as his replacement! You have big vegan shoes to fill, idiot. But at least your franchise has a championship under its hemp belt.

Anonymous said...

G$....OSU kicked off the season against Marshall a few years back on a Friday. I took the day off of work and was at The Out R Inn around 10a.m. Rutgers/OSU on a Friday would not affect me.

--Drew

Jeff said...

OSU Marshall was on a Thursday.....

Anonymous said...

How is the Buckeyes breaking rules again not being talked about?

Jeff said...

A self reported secondary violation??? LOLZ anon.

Anonymous said...

I am still coming. There is a slight chance I could reNIG, but, lesbihonest, I doubt it. Iceman and Dut get free ribs. If I don't make it, there will be a $50 tab awaiting you homos.

Ide

Grumpy said...

Randall, if you're bringing +2, have them sit with us.

Anonymous said...

Don't

Ide

Anonymous said...

Marshall was on a Thursday? That definitely means I took two days off for fucking OSU/Marshall. I have issues.

Wut breaking rules tomfoolery is anon talking about?

--Drew

GMoney said...

Drool, that was 5+ years ago and you were at a much different stage of your existence.

For the record, I don't like Thursday night football at all. That isn't your day and the NFL proves that you are inferior. Play your shit on Saturday like you're supposed to (but not you, MACtion, you were born to play on Tuesdays!).

But early in the year, I don't have a huge problem wedging a weeknight game in there. Conference games though? No way, bruh.

Guaranteed that Ide doesn't show up. It will be the best RibFest ever.

Cakes said...

Playing on Friday night is fucking ridiculous. That idea should be taken out back and shot right away.

Cocktail hour?! Should I wear a suit and tie?

The return of Parks and Rec was exactly what I needed last night even if it was strange to see Donna and Gurgich on the opening sequence.

GMoney said...

Dear Canada, Fuck You.

Cakes, I've got some bad news for you. I was all set to send you down here to cover the Arnold Classic this weekend and interview some sexy bodybuilders. It fell through. I won't apologize though because you don't deserve that.

Cakes said...

I feel like I've earned that type of assignment with my ELITE interview skills but you're the boss! A terrible boss, but a boss nonetheless.

Anonymous said...

I guess since my appearance has been request I'll attend. I have to work Saturday and Sunday but I'll be sure to make it. Oh and Friday games are dumb. Way to make yourself look like a mid major conference

Larry

Racist Gruden said...

I'm not sure where this football Friday issue comes from. The more we can exploit young negro teens for money the better if you ask me. Stop acting like a bunch of Kansas City faggots.

Randall Stevens said...

If I bring 2 they'll be sitting on Grumpy's knees. Try not to get hard while eating ribs, boss.

Anonymous said...

There's a very slim chance I might be attending.

- MUfan

GMoney said...

I have yet to eat a rack of ribs without an erection. Does that apply to all of us or just Grump?

Shut up with your ELITIST attitude, Larry. Notre Dame plays games in Europe because they are FAGGOTS! FACT!

But Racist Gruden, if we let them play on Friday nights, that is one less night that you'll be able to grind tape! Hope you can make it next weekend! Collared greens are on me!

GMoney said...

Our boss/employee relationship is very similar to Jennifer Anistons and Charlie Days in Horrible Bosses.

Anonymous said...

G$...wanna put on a speedo tomorrow and we can walk around the Arnold together showing off our awesome bods?

--Drew

GMoney said...

You're on!

Anonymous said...

We should walk around with boners too.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

Won't be able to make it. Since I have been working every week in ATL, I only have a couple nights at home. Need to do the responsible thing and spend the time with the family.
-(Former) NC Nate

Anonymous said...

Yeah I guess selling a recruit on whether he would rather play in Europe or a Friday night game is dumb

Larry