Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Super Bowl Saturday??

Cakes' version of porn.

God, I fucking hate the Grammys.  It's the worst collection of people giving out awards for the worst collection of songs.  It's just straight pollution from top to bottom.  And then on top of all of the wretched songs, you have all these artists trying to fucking out-weird each other.  I happened to catch a few minutes of this bullshit Sunday night since my wife is a God damn sucker for the worst shows on TV.  I just don't understand.  Why was Pharrell wearing Smokey the Bear's hat?  Why were two guys dressed up like robots?  Why do all of these people doing live performances all look like they're squeezing out a shit that's ripping butthole skin while singing?  It's times like these I'm glad I don't listen to any of this trash.  Popular music can get fucked forever.  Moving on.

Since this is Super Bowl week that's what we're gonna do.  Talk Super Bowl.  I know G$ has his annual Super Bowl prediction coming sometime this week so I'll try not to step on any blogging toes today.

A lot of discussion has been going on with this whole outdoor Super Bowl situation and I'm curious how everyone else feels about it.  Personally I think the Super Bowl should be a dome game/warm weather climate game every single year.  This is why:  The NFL has made it pretty damn clear that their brand is a business first before a game.  A business's top goal, over everything else, is to make money, right?  And if that's the way they want to handle shit, then so be it.  But if the NFL is going to be a business first, then they need to make smart business decisions and keep the people putting dollars in their pocket happy.

By having the Super Bowl in an outdoor weather stadium, the league runs the risk of Mother Nature taking a greasy white dump directly on everything in a 100 plus mile radius.  And it sounds like that's exactly what's in store for this Sunday.  I'm fairly certain the last forecast report I saw called for a fuck ton of snow.  Exact wording, actually.  Not to get all Cowherd and ratings on you, but people will shut off a game that is boring as fuck.  Even if it's the game that will decide a champion.  It's just how we are.  We want to be entertained and we want to be entertained now.

There is also word circulating that the NFL is considering moving the day/time of the game because of said severe weather conditions.  WUT??  I haven't heard anything recently about a definitive yes or no to this idea or when the final decision will be made...but what an absolutely offensive contingency plan.  Never before have I seen a business piss in the face of it's consumers more with fewer repercussions.  But we just keep coming back for more with our mouths wide open walking blindly into the stream.  But for how much longer will the public allow themselves to be disrespected like this?  How many fans (dollars to the NFL) does the league lose by making this call?  Again...a bad business move in my opinion.  It's similar to McDonald's calling everyone a fat fuck on the way out the door essentially daring them to not come back.  The only difference is there are plenty more fast food places for us to get obese at.  There's only one NFL and they play that card like a fucking pro.

This is precisely why outdoor stadiums in cold weather climates should never be considered.  Mother Nature is a dirty turbo slut who is more unpredictable than an actual woman.  Cakes can tell you all about it if you have literally nothing else to do and 6 hours to kill.  If the NFL does move the day of this game, how many people are they completely fucking over?  The people who have parties planned and took work off Monday aren't even the ones that the NFL will have to worry about.  Let's say the NFL moves the game up one day to Saturday or one day back to Monday.  How fucking cheesed is the guy who has tickets to the game AND now has a useless $200 hotel reservation for Sunday night that he can't move or get his money back for?  What about the guy with a $800 non refundable/non transferable plane ticket?  Do you think he's the only one?  Nope.

There is nothing smart about having the Super Bowl anywhere but a dome/warm weather and it all could have been avoided.  People already invest a ton of their money into the Super Bowl, whether it be with their own party or actually attending the game.  Now the NFL is asking people to spend MORE of their money to fix the problems the league created on top of being incredibly inconvenienced.  All because the NFL thought it was a neat idea to have the Super Bowl in a place that snows a lot in February.  Good call, guys.  Why even take that chance with the consumers?  They're just buttfucking the golden goose for absolutely no reason.  WE are the reason the NFL is so successful, right?  Without us caring so passionately about people we've never met and probably never will meet, the NFL is closer to the NHL, right?  One of these days people are going to get fed up with the bullshit and Goodell & Co. will be left holding each others dicks.  The NFL needs to start making more decisions based on what consumers want or us consumers need to stop spending so much money on a business that doesn't really have our best interest in mind.  Unfortunately until we stop blindly handing them wads of our cash, the NFL will have us by the balls with a free pass to whatever the fuck they please.  Like moving the Super Bowl.

Also, feel free to discuss Michigan being first in the Big 10 and Ide losing a rib bet.


Anonymous said...

Not one single aspect of this post makes sense. Not one.

First off, the easily Google able weather report is high of 39 with a chance of flurries with no accumulation. Mostly cloudy during the day and clear during the evening.

Secondly, no contingency plan is in place. They aren't moving the date at all. In fact, they held it outdoors in a northern town because of snow/weather. I'm also pretty sure anyone going to this SB can afford to change it. $200 is a conservative number. Days Inn in Hoboken is getting $500 a night.

So, yeah, you just spent 1000+ words on complete make believe. Its not snowing and they aren't moving shit. So they aren't spending MORE of their money (is the NFL broke or a government entity, where anyone should give a fuck how they spend their money?). And they aren't fucking the fan base over at all. 99.9% of Seahawks/Broncos fans will be warm at home. The SB is basically made for the richest 1%, not the average fan. That should be your topic.

Oh, and rhe robots are Daft Punk. They do that so people won't know their identity so they can live normal lives. They have been huge since 1998 and get to be completely anonymous. Not really a bad deal.


Mr. Ace said...

...what Ide said.

The twitter backlash against Macklemore winning all the rap Grammys was pretty great.

Grumpy said...

If they move the date there will be a deluge of lawsuits.

Never heard of Macklemore until Monday morning.

GMoney said...

As I was sitting in traffic yesterday, Goodell was on Mike & Homo and said that, yes, there are contingency plans but they don't anticipate needing them.

All of this business talk makes it seem like Zig Ziglar wrote this tripe.

I'm OK with the outdoor game but I would prefer keeping these things south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Why risk it? Plus, you're pissing off media stalwarts like Peter King who might have to waddle out of the press box for a few minutes and get his cheeks cold to do his job poorly.

You can get around the snow but the wind will be the issue. It's why I LOVE the unders.

Floyd Mayweather put 10.6 million on Denver -2.5 and 3.4 million on Denver 1H -1.5. Dude is dropping 14 mill on a loser. He knows.

Welcome back, Ide? That doesn't sound right.

Randall Stevens said...

The talk of moving the date came last week around Thursday or Friday. Like the post stated...I didn't read an update saying they were actually doing this. I read that it was a contingency plan if they received word the weather was going to be shit on Sunday and too dangerous to travel. I just thought it was an interesting topic to discuss. Guess I was wrong.

GMoney said...

I meant "dude isn't dropping 14 mill on a loser".

Jeff said...

Super Bowl should be played in a warm weather/controlled climate unless an SEC team is playing.

Way to drag the flag jackets. Talk about coming back to earth and falling flat on your face. Ooof! I guess the Olympic break will be good for them.

He's out of hIDEing!

Randall Stevens said...

If Ide doesn't want to talk about the posted topic, he can always comment about the rib dinner he's going to owe in a month and a half.

GMoney said...

Yes, Jeff, that was a brutal loss for America's Team. Our scoring lines have been silent recently. Not cool, bruh.

I blame George Matthews. We are 0-2 since his golden voice retired for good. I'm going to the 3/11 game vs. the Detroit Period Blood. DEAL WITH IT.

Anonymous said...

I'd pay you in ribs to post a topic that didn't ignore the 5 day forecast. Would you like to buy some volcano insurance?

Nothing wrong with Pharrell's hat. It was funny because it was bigger than you know, a normal hat.


GMoney said...

Speaking of the Grammys, the only parts that I caught were Macklemore (LOL) and Metallica playing with Ichiro. Metallica...woof. Not good. Jared Leto (homo) introduced them as a band that "always stayed true to themselves" which is about the biggest lie ever otherwise they wouldn't be playing One with a chinaman on the piano.

Lars Ulrich is the worst.

Prime99 said...

I tried to watch the NIN/QOTSA performance which was great until they threw a Delta Airlines ad over the top, then the credits, then cut it off. The Grammys are not, and never have been about actual music.

You maybe should have had a contingency post?

Anonymous said...

I like the idea of playing the Super Bowl in northern weather. If it snows it snows...it's fucking football.


GMoney said...


If a title/legacy is on the line, give me good conditions. I don't want no fluke!

Anonymous said...

I'd like to see SEC teams come up into B1G Country in any month....not just Novemeber. Unfortunately, they never leave with a just a couple exceptions.


Anonymous said...

IDE's first post back and he gets owned on all fronts. Considering the NFL is a multi billion dollar organization and categorized legally as a not for profit, I'd say we should care about how they spend their money. Since you know, they probably pay less taxes than the cost of your Lacoste wardrobe.

- j Saul

Anonymous said...

Ide -

Where the hell were you last week?


Anonymous said...

My wardrobe is Brooks Brothers mostly, dick. I am a white male afterall.

Not sure how or why I should care if the NFL is a non profit. Taxes are paid on revenue not expenses. So if they make $10 billion and spend $8 billion, they get taxed on the $10 billion, meaning, again, I could care less how they spend their money (aren't you an accountant or something?!).

The revenue structure of the NFL is actually pretty interesting. All clubs get taxed, and the NFL Network gets taxed, as does the membership dues that each team must pay every year ($6 million). If you want to argue economics, tax status and why they are classified as such, that is another topic. One that isn't preceded by a made up weather report.

Which begs the question: Where in the fuck did you read this weather report claiming a fuck ton of snow? Perhaps, it's because I live here and know the weather report, but it's pretty asinine to write an entire topic based on a hypothetical that has already been disproven by every meteorologist in the area. Jym Ganahl does not work in this city.

So no, I would beg to differ that I got owned on any front.


Anonymous said...

I am not an accountant. Just because my company name sounds like accountant, does not mean that is my profession.

I get that it's only on league offices revenues, but that just means they have more untaxed dollars to pay Goodelle 29mil/year and build themselves a new Manhattan office pushing the IDE's of the world out to Brooklyn.

Plus it's just a joke they are associated with a term non profit when they only contributed like 2.3 mil to charity. Have you ever taken up an argument on principle?

In conclusion, IDE is pro Roger G, which means he supports the decision of the Super Bowl to be in an outdoor stadium, which means he cares how how their business is run.

- j Saul

Anonymous said...

The NFL once tried to tax my income from my time at Hooters. Lynched that Gene Upshaw good over that.

-Racist Gruden

Cakes said...

Randall should've consulted me before throwing out these wild predictions of snowstorms. I haven't heard of any snow for the game over the last two weeks. Stop getting your info from Blizzrd Bill.

I LOVE the idea of cold weather super bowls. It's part of the game. There is nothing more entertaining than watching meaningful football in a snowstorm. I don't know what the fuck Randall is talking about. Who would turn that game off?

Anonymous said...

G$....I will also be at Wings/Jackets on 3/11. You'll be carrying a flag in your asshole when you make your depressing stroll out of Nationwide that night.


Randall Stevens said...


There's also a story about it on Yahoo in case NY Daily news is too tabloid for you. Jackass.

GMoney said...

That is usually what I do...

I don't know. When it comes to the Super Bowl, I want the better team to win. I don't want the team better equipped to handle the snow to be crowned champion. Does that make sense? Probably not. Fuck Seattle. That makes sense.

Anonymous said...

"If an unforeseen storm arrives Sunday morning, the league could then immediately decide to switch the game to Monday night."

Sweet hypothetical. A quick cross check of the weather would have done wonders. They even have a tab JUST FOR THE SUPER BOWL.


Join us next week when we will be discussing possible alien invasions and what to do in the event a car randomly smashes through your front door.


GMoney said...

You know what they say about the weather in north Jersey...if you don't like it, JUST WAIT TEN MINUTES! LOLZ!

How's Brooklyn, Ide, you hipster asshole?

Randall Stevens said...

You must have missed the part of the article where the guys said a huge snow storm predicted by weather experts. Here it is since you can't read:

"If the NFL has to move the day or time of Super Bowl XLVIII because a huge snowstorm is predicted by all the weather experts"

Tune in next week when Ide shows you how to see what you only want to see.

Anonymous said...

No. Just no. You are a JOURNALISM major. Context? FINISH THE FUCKING SENTENCE.

It should be noted this is the opening sentence/paragraph.

"If the NFL has to move the day or time of Super Bowl XLVIII because a huge snowstorm is predicted by all the weather experts, the decision will be made by Roger Goodell from an office at NFL headquarters at 345 Park Avenue and the repercussions will be felt around the world."

Hahahahahaha. There was never a snowstorm predicted. I should know, I live in the damn area, and it was the entire reason I noticed this post.


Cakes said...

Randall just got OWNED! Don't you think I would've been all over it if there had been a huge snowstorm predicted for the super bowl?