|Racist or diehard Skins fans?|
The Yankees sign Jacoby Ellsbury to a whopping 7 year/153 million dollar contract – Well, the financials here are just absurd. There is no chance in Hell that the speedy Native American can live up to those figures. I was TOTES not expecting them to be a player for Ellsbury but it makes sense because our front office is petty and immature and probably finds it adorbs that they stole away Boston’s most talented player. Little do they realize that Boston was letting him walk anyway. Here’s the thing though: I like the signing. I have always felt that Ellsbury was OVERRATED until I had him on my fantasy team this year and he most definitely is not. He is a really good player (albeit a tad brittle). I like that we are shifting from a team reliant on home runs to one that is fast as fuck and plays killer defense. So while I think that they overpaid by 40 million or so (par for the course with this bunch), you can’t deny that the Yankees are better today with Ellsbury and McCann (both still in their prime) over Granderson and Chris Stewart. And as Jermaine Dupri likes to say “Money ain’t a thang”. Now if they would just address 2B, 3B, SP, and RP then we’d be a LOCK for the title!!!
Quit fucking around, Cano – I’m starting to get a little concerned with the Cano talks though. By the time of this being posted, the Yankees could have already signed Kelly Johnson and with the McCann/Ellsbury deals out there plus the near lock of winning the bid on Nip fireballer, Tanaka, there might not be anything left for Robbie. And you know what, I think that I might be OK with that. He’s a great player and I want him around still, but he’s 32 and wants 250 million dollars. That’s just bad business and we REALLY need to stop doing bad business. If Seattle wants him, they can have him at that price. You will never hear from him again. I’m sure that the Yankees would do 7/175 on him but I’m starting to feel like his days in NY are over. And that’s a shame but the lesson is that if you like where you are then don’t be unreasonably greedy. Everyone is replaceable.
This one doesn’t make sense – I get trading Prince Fielder. I don’t get giving away Doug Fister—a proven playoff pitcher and innings eater—away for a bag of water-logged baseballs. Drew Smyly better work out in the rotation otherwise this is a massive failure. Good for Fister, though, he got to escape Hell/Detroit and join the best rotation in baseball. It sounds like the Tigers are closing in on a deal with Joe Nathan which is about two years and a billion blown saves too late. He would be a good signing but his balls are getting pretty old. Anyway, since all of you rubes like to suck off Dombrowski and you can defend the Kinsler move to death, but you can’t deny that this latest trade makes you worse in 2014.
Billy Beane is crazy – Prime may be able to add more to this but what the hell has gotten into the A’s? They’re wheeling and dealing like Riverboat Ron. I like the trade for Jim Johnson since Balfour is out the door. But 22 million for Scott Kazmir? Scott Kazmir is SHIT. Eh, what the hell do I know…it seems like everyone Beane signs ends up fitting in perfectly out there.
The Red Sox are doomed – Only shitbag loser teams sign AJ Pierzynski AKA the biggest shithead in the game. Good to know that they aren’t serious about repearing as champions. On the other hand, Salty signed a 3 year 20+ million dollar deal with the Marlins. Why would he want to go there? And what about Rob Brantly? The Marlins should just hang up every time the Tigers call because they ALWAYS get fleeced.
Finally, Grandy – It sounds like the former Yankee will either sign with the Cubs or Mets which is about the saddest choices you could have outside of Houston. Poor guy. I really like him but his skills have just eroded so much over the past few years that it is basically home run or nothing and below average OF defense. Which makes him a perfect fit in either Chicago or Queens. Speaking of ex-Yankees, I REALLY like the Twins signing Phil Hughes. That park is perfect for him. He should thrive in Minnesota.
Then again, there could be 100 moves made between the time I write this and the time that it posts so who knows. Obviously, feel free to discuss any offseason move or rumor today. One thing is certain: the Indians won’t do anything because they seem to be back in the Dolan’s Discounts mindset. Good luck putting a pitching staff together off the clearance rack. I’ve heard great things about Derek Lowe! You suck. Deal with it.