Wednesday, August 28, 2013

CFB Preview Week: Bold and Beautiful

Best sign ever.
That was certainly an inspired commenting effort yesterday.  Granted, the topics were annoying but, per Jemele Hill and Uncle Tom Smith, NUMBERS NEV-UH LIE!!!  Before we get into today's bold predictions, I would like to talk about last night's documentary "RGIII: Will To Win".  It was probably the greatest hour of my life ever.  Yours, too.  I have never been more inspired.  On with the boldness!

Li'l Strut:
1. The Indiana Hoosiers will contend for the B1G Leaders Division Title: The offense was not the issue last year as Indiana averaged over 30 points a game and was 17th in the nation in passing yards. With 19 starters returning (10 off, 9 def – tied for #1 in country), Indiana will be in the leaders division race until being officially eliminated by Ohio State on November 23.
2. UCLA will win the PAC 12 Championship: Former NFL Coach Jim Mora took a UCLA team that lost 8 games in each of its previous two seasons and won 8 games in his first season, which included a win against rival USC. He enters his second year with a decent amount of experience returning and a team that is primed to ascend to the top of the PAC 12.
3. Georgia will win the SEC Title: Its Georgia’s time. With the offensive firepower the Bulldogs have returning, and all their tough conference games at home, this year sets up nicely. If UGA can go into Death Valley and beat Clemson in week one, the Dawgs may be on their way to an undefeated regular season and a revenge win over ‘Bama in the SEC Title Game. (You’re welcome MUDawg)

Damman:
1. Texas A&M will beat Alabama again. Jonathon Football will play and he will tear up Saban’s asshole again. He seems like the kind of kid who is going thrive under the pressure from all the shit that he has created. A final “eat my ass” to all of his critics.
2. Penn St. will finally hit the shitter and lose 8 or more games. It was a nice story with these guys doing so well last year, but reality will hit big time this year as the weight of the sanctions begin to take their toll.
3. The American Athletic Conference Will Have Four Top 25 Teams by Season’s End. The what you say? Apparently this is what they are calling the old Big East. I didn’t know about this name until starting to do research for this. Only Louisville is ranked to start the year, but I see the league being stronger than expected with Louisville, UC, Central Florida and Rutgers being the four teams ranked by the end of the year.

Drew:
1. The Ohio State Buckeyes average over 40 pts a game this year on offense.
2. Lee Corso dies during this season.
3. Tulsa wins at Oklahoma.

The Wig Master:
1. Teddy Pendergrass and the Louisville Cards go undefeated, but due to a laughable STREMPH of schedule they get left out of the BCS Championship.
2. Mack Brown and the Longhorns lose at least four games and the Texas faithful are calling for a coaching change by December.
3. Notre Dame endures a three game losing streak this season and is not ranked in the top 25 at the end of the year.

GSaul:
1. Terry Bowden will get fired and take Professor Jim Tressel’s “General Principles of Coaching” class before leaving Akron.
2. John Mellencamp’s son Hud is cleared of felony battery charges and leads Duke to its second consecutive bowl game appearance.
3. Kent State’s Dri Archer accumulates 2,000 rushing yards and 1,000 receiving yards.

G$:
1. Baylor wins the Big 12.  Now that Chip Kelly is gone, Art Briles is the biggest offensive genius in the game.  Between Seastrunk and Bryce Petty, how are you going to stop these guys?
2. You guys know all too well how much I like attaching my money to a MAC school and riding them to huge profits.  While it's too early to be rash, I've got a good feeling about Western Michigan this year.  By all accounts, (youngest coach in FBS) PJ Fleck, is really good at his job.  I really like the Broncos +27.5 against Sparty in week one since MSU can't complete a pass.
3. Ohio State is going to lose.  It's going to happen and you all know it.  Teams don't go 25-0 any more regardless of their schedule.  My guess is that they lose either at Cal (a game that Prime will be covering!) or at Darrell Hazell.  You can argue this all you want in the comments but you won't change my opinion.

We're 60% done and, to celebrate, tonight is the big MSFL Draft!  Now with 100% less Grumpy!  I'll see you all in the war rooms this evening and tomorrow we will hand out the Heisman (but not the Weisman).

46 comments:

Mr. Ace said...

I like the cut of G$'s jib. But the Fuckeyes are losing twice.

I also enjoy Drew calling for Corso's death. If A-Hern killed him Urban would totes cover it up.

Nard Reedy will lead the MAC in receiving yards.

Gardner will be first team all B1G.

Nobody goes undefeated.

Nate said...

Gardner is the fourth best QB in the conference.

1.) Miller
2.) Coulter
3.) Martinez
4.) Gardner

The guy consistently under throws his deep ball. Against weaker opponents, his WR's are strong enough to come back to it. Against better D's, it's a pick.

MuDawgFan said...

I haven't really heard too much about Michigan State for this upcoming season. But I can't remember the last time they beat someone by 28 points....


Lil Strut 4 Lyfe

Mr. Ace said...

Nate, are we talking about the same guy with a 161+ passer rating(better than Teddy Bridgewater) in the games he started....AFTER PLAYING FUCKING WR!?!?

And I'm sorry, I thought this was bold predictions day. Although I must admit I don't think it's that bold.

Sparty will lose 5 games.

Anonymous said...

Ace is certainly going #allin on Gardner this year. This will be the prediction to look back on when UM drops 3 games.

Bama won't make the BCS game. It will probably be LSU or UGA.

Ide

Prime99 said...

Aaron Hernandez was addicted to angel dust? Urb covered up some AH shit at Florida? Rolling Stone sounds like their upcoming issue is going to be a gas!

Cal vs. Ohio? I'd go except I dislike both teams and tickets are expensive.

Anonymous said...

Can't we just argue UM and OSU for another day?

Good read. For as long as Drew's comments are he is less then insightful on his blog entries.

Bold Prediction: Since the SEC owns ESPN, the NCAA, and the BCS....I am predicting once again an all SEC title game.

Unless OSU tacks on its 25-hoe season (they won't), and Aces "no undefeated's" happen, we may sniff it. Lot of man power in that league as much we all hate it.

- J Saul

The Iceman said...

When criticizing another team's quarterback's arm, you should probably have a QB on your own team that completes passes higher than a 58% clip. Braxton Miller isn't exactly Drew Brees, Nate.

Prime99 said...

Urban Meyer's initials should be offensive to Ohio fans.

Nate said...

Passer rating alone isn't the only factor in being a good college QB.

Gardner may be the best passer in the league, but in the three games he played a decent defense, he netted 43 rushing yards last year.

The guy is one dimensional and not near as difficult to plan against than Miller (or Coulter).



Anonymous said...

Nate- Braxton may have finished top 5 in the heisman last year, but come on. HE ONLY COMPLETED 58% OF HIS PASSES! Obviously gardener is a better player.

Why did the elite mind of Brady hoke move gardener to wr if he was such an elite passer?

The Rolling Stones article says that urban "may" have covered up a failed drug test. Quality article.

UGA is not winning the SEC. They are the Sparty of the SEC.

I laughed at drews post. He's really taking this seriously.

Dut

The Iceman said...

You can't say Garner is one dimensional, Nate. You have no idea what he's capable of now that Denard is gone. Gardner runs a 4.5 40 and he put up a ton of rushing yards as a QB in high school. I'm pretty sure he hasn't completely abandoned that part of his game in 4 years and I'm also fairly confident he's more than just a passer. He's not the running threat Denard was but he's certainly not one dimensional.

Gardner almost put up better passing numbers in 5 games starting than Miller did all season. And that was after Gardner played WR for the first 2/3 of the season. I'm not saying he is far and away the better QB...but he's on the same level as Miller talent wise and for you to put Gardner at the 4th best QB in the conference while saying Miller is the unquestioned best QB is just being a Michigan hater.

The Iceman said...

The Heisman is bullshit, Dut. But it's super cute you think it still means something. You can shatter every college record at your position but if your team loses 5 games...or if you play for a mid major...you can't win it. Please tell me how that system determines the best player in college football.

Mr. Ace said...

Nate, DAS RAYCESS. Gardner is a pro style qb. We are a pro style offense. He's not going to run for a ton of yards for us, but he is far from one dimentional. Great afflete.

I didn't mention Braxton once. Fuckeyes get all butthurt when anybody thinks their guyisn't the goat.

Anonymous said...

Passing

Michigan
C/ATT YDS AVG TD INT
Gardner 11/20 171 8.6 1 1
Ohio State
C/ATT YDS AVG TD INT
Miller 14/18 189 10.5 1 0

Gardner also paired that blazing performance with an even more impressive -28 yards rushing.

Bragging about performances wins over Minnesota, Iowa, and OT vs Northwestern must be the new benchmark for UM bragging.

Ide

Mr. Ace said...

Don't forget 214 and 3 TDs against SC.

What were Miller's numbers against those HORRIBLY TERRIBLE DEFENSIVE SQUADS?

Anonymous said...

Ace- your fellow Michigan fan iceman brought up Braxton miller. I'm so glad iceman isn't an osu fan.

Dut

GMoney said...

Hi guys! I had a health screening this morning (still ELITE!) and then tried to kill my dog on a walk in this absurd heat so I'm playing catch up. What did I miss?

(scrolls through comments)

Nothing. Got it.

Hey Ape, I'm going to keep up the Friday gambling posts since everyone here does it or should be. You fancy yourself as some sort of Jimmy The Greek. Do you want a weekly paragraph on Fridays with your pick to click (just one GUARANSHEED)? We'll chart your progress and make bank hopefully. If you don't want to, that's fine, but you will just be showing how one dimensional you are.

Braxton had as many first place Heisman votes last year as Jordan Lynch. MACtion! Braxton has already been disqualified from the Weisman. But that is for tomorrow.

Gardner? Miller? Martinez? Who gives a shit? Where all the white dudes at?

The Iceman said...

Dut. Your fellow Ohio fan Nate brought up Miller before anyone. I was just responding to that. Good story though.

Sure Ide. Some of those numbers Gardner put up were against some lower tier teams in the Big 10 and certainly aren't comparable to the lights out passing numbers Miller put up against the likes of UAB, Purdue and Penn State. One TD with 2 picks and 400 passing yards on 47% completion is other worldly. Miller is clearly in a league of his own when it comes to spinning the pigskin. Fist yourself.

Uncle Tom said...

GMO

Tay-Tay Martinez, George Hernandez, Aaron Fernandez - they all is WHITE HISPANICS.

Don't give me dat minoritay bullshit.

Only one minoritay up in dis ghetto n' that's uz dark meat.

HOODIES UP

GMoney said...

Cal vs. Ohio? I'd go except I dislike both teams and tickets are expensive.

I've got credentials for you. J/K, you pay double. You should introduce your son to insufferable assholes early anyway because we all know that his real dad won't.

Mr. Ace said...

I am totes down to give you douchers some horrible gambling advice.

GMoney said...

I don't mean to get all Riley Cooper here but if you are a run first QB who throws a shitty ball to no one, then I can't really call you a QB. Tebow? Denard? Braxton so far? In my mind, more "athlete" than QB. Manziel, RG3, Cam, Teddy Bridges...quarterbacks.

So don't tell me how great of a QB Cool Cut Miller is yet when he hasn't shown that he can win a game with his arm (other than when Brett Bielema's defense decides to play the worst prevent ever).

I have spoken.

GMoney said...

I'll leave it up to you: you can either post your LOCK in the comments or email me something during the week that I can attach to the main post. It will get you back in the bloggin' game if you choose option 2 and I know that you've been (get rich or die) tryin' to get back in the flow.

By the way, is Wig Master really going to be drafting from Scotland tonight? That would be incredible.

GMoney said...

Also, because I need to make up for lost time:

Number of fake ambulance rides for no reason at all - Gardner 0, Miller 1.

Advantage = Gardner

GMoney said...

Damn, I have more!

Yesterday on The Price Is Right, some old black dude was spinning the big wheel and fell down. It was the GOAT LOL. TPIR is always a great watch.

Nate said...

Apparently G$ has a better idea of what makes a good college QB than the Big Ten & SEC Coaches and AP.

All three of those guys you listed were either first or second team conference QB, some in multiple years.

There is a big difference between a solid NFL QB and a solid College QB.

Poor passing mechanics in college are much easier to hide.

Mr. Ace said...

I will email you.

Gardner is killing it today.

Anonymous said...

In the immortal words of J Saul, wins are the only stat to matter.

Braxton 1 Gardner 0

Ide

Anonymous said...

LOLZ @ G$ thinking the Buckeyes are going to lose....that's crazy talk.

Also, LOLZ @ Ape talking about Urban covering something up. Read the dumb article you dope.

--Drew

GMoney said...

Nate, it's just my personal opinion (and NOT Demetrius Stanley's PERSONAL OPINION!) and it's one of the many reasons why college football does not compare with the NFL. Horrible QB play is celebrated at this level. I can't embrace that.

Then again, I am racist against the spread offense and jet sweeps and whatnot but love the fuck out of the read option on Sundays so whatever.

GMoney said...

Ohio losing a game wouldn't be nearly as big of a shocker as the Red Wings losing to the Blackhawks!

The Iceman said...

"In the immortal words of J Saul, wins are the only stat to matter.

How you know Ide just got owned in the comments today.

Anonymous said...

Disagree G$....the Red Wings had lost to the Blackhawks before. Urban Meyer has proven taht he can't lose as head coach of the Buckeyes. So, it would be more shocking.

--Drew

Nate said...

Your disapproval of the jet sweep is disgusting.

Next you're going to tell me you don't like the option / play action, perfected by Troy Smith.


The NFL is now a copycat league. There is very little originality and anything new brought into the league has already been scripted to perfection at the NCAA level. That reason alone is why college football will always be better than the pro's.

GMoney said...

Prepare to be embarrassed tonight, Nathaniel. I do not tolerate insubordination.

Urb once lost a home game with Timmy Tens to Houston Nutt. It will happen again even in new uniforms. God Bless.

Anonymous said...

Just read that Aaron Hernandez story. Not really earth shattering at all.

This is the only line pertaining to Urban:

“Meyer kept us at such a distance,” says the reporter, “or flat-out lied, that we couldn’t verify a pot suspension.”

Ide

Anonymous said...

Watch it Ide! Ape can't be having Urbz cover up reasons why he suspends players! LOLZ! What an idiot Ape is.

--Drew

Mr. Ace said...

I didn't read the article. I just saw headlines last night on Twitter. I was trolling you queefs. Thanks for participating.

Anonymous said...

Except you trolled yourself, because it ended up making you look like a uninformed moron.

--Drew

GMoney said...

I'm really looking forward to your inevitable hilarious upset loss. By the way, making pro scouts wear red shirts is such a faggot move. Seriously, grow up, Urb. It's a fucking shirt color.

Anonymous said...

Not surprising that G$ can't wrap his head around the GOAT rivalry in sports.

--Drew

GMoney said...

I'm at a loss. When did we start talking about Ide vs. Malcolm X?

Anonymous said...

That's a dead rivaly. Thankfully.

Ide

Anonymous said...

Johnny fucking Football gets a 30 minute suspension. Holy. Fucking. Shit.

Why didn't OSU hire those scumbag lawyers?!

Ide

GMoney said...

Gene Smith had no other options once Johnny Cochran died. Maybe Al Sharpton or Jake Brigance.