|Relevant. Your move, Zombie Danzig and Zombie Lundgren...|
*Rick has toned back on his insanity much to my dismay and wants to blitzkrieg Woodbury.
*Daryl and Merle are being asked to fight to the death in one of those classic Woodbury Zombie Lumberjack matches
*The Governor is now the crazy one as he has an eye patch, a fully dead zombie daughter, Andrea's sweet ass, and a burning hatred of Merle
*Tyreese is still trying to set up his prison boxing gym. He might be interested in Carol’s peach cobbler.
*Speaking of Carol: still worthless
*That blonde girl, Beth I think, keeps sizing up Deputy Dipshit’s loaded weapon
*Deputy Dipshit gonna SLAY THAT PUSS
*Maggie is still my angel and anyone who speaks ill of her will die by my hand
*Glenn is still an Asian and much more badass then he is given credit for
*Andrea is the most naïve and bananas person on the show; wears lovely thongs though which are very important in a zombie apocalypse
*Hershel is still a gimp
*LORI IS DEAD! Judith is the baby girl’s name and it is a terrible name.
*Michonne hates everyone but that kitana is just terrific
*Remember when Ghost Shane popped up a few episodes to spook Rick? The fuck was that all about. I WANT REAL SHANE!
That about covers everything as we wait for the second half of season three to begin in two days. A few other quick things that I want to address to help stimulate our internet-rections as we head into the weekend:
*I hope that everyone is following that recruit from Florida who wants to go to Arkansas and play for their chubtard coach (LOLWHY?) but his likely obese mother won’t have any part of that. She wants him to stay closer to home and attend The U because she wants to watch him play more. Mama was very mature in her objection by taking the LOI and hiding it. I don't know why the NCAA needs a parent's permission for an 18 year old kid to make a choice but apparently they do. It sounds like the kid's dad signed the form for him to go to Let Him Live U but the mom just hired Johnnie Cochran's firm to stop it. THIS IS NUTS. This woman is the worst person ever.
*Jay Cutler “proposed” to K-Cav via text and by mailing her an engagement ring. This might be the most Cutler thing ever. The man is a hopeless roman-cat.
*Titus Young SENIOR, after getting released by the Lions for being an asshole, told his high school football coach that he is better than Megatron. Drew sent me this story. The coach pretty much just laughed at his stupid face. Good luck with this guy, Rams.
*Can ESPN please stop talking about the Lakers? They are morphing into Team Tenor with the amount of pointless coverage they get after EVERY game. If they won, ten analysts have to come on and discuss their playoff odds. If they lost, twenty analysts come on and discuss their playoff odds. STOP.
*Finally, can the local media please stop comparing every WR/RB recruit to Percy Harvin? I feel like every goddamn player that Urb has signed since he’s been here (including the linemen) has been rumored by someone to be a Percy Harvin clone. Until one of these guys sits out half a season for a headache, you don’t have the next Percy Harvin. By the way, Harvin is a pretty awful person so maybe you shouldn’t want his twin on your team anyway.
That will do it for this week. Enjoy the football-less weekend. I’m probably going to spend Monday breaking down the big battle between Crean Pie and Pear Nose followed by zombies so try to contain yourselves. If you have any predictions for Season 3 Part 2, fire them off in the comments. My pick to click: there is no way that Merle makes it to season 4. Out.