Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Blogging Makes Strange Bedfellows

Big fan of Chris Jent, this guy is.
As we all know, the college hoops season tipped off this past weekend and it got off to an interesting start to say the least. Both games scheduled to be played outdoors on the east coast were canceled because the people planning those games are idiots. Those games are a great idea in theory but they aren’t very practical. It’s still goddamn November at night. Even if “wet floor” wasn’t an issue, have fun playing a game in 40 degree weather. I am mostly singling out the Marquette/Ohio State debacle here. What the liberal media is not telling you is that this is entirely Thad Matta’s fault. He refused to put his team on the court once he realized that the audience would be mostly American troops. He was under the impression that the only people in attendance would be his beloved Taliban warlords. Because Thad Matta is a terrorist. Makes sense to me.

Anyway, in lieu of me firing up a preview post today, I have enlisted the help of this blog’s greatest rivalry to help teach us some things about college basketball. I would have added some Ric Flair myself, but I was stuck at a stupid charity dinner last night and didn’t have time to add anything. So you get legendary commenting rivals, Seal and Drew, breaking down the upcoming season! Seal’s Wildcats are looking to defend their national title with an entirely new starting lineup while Drew’s Fuck Weasels are seeking another conference crown and yet another extended run in March. I asked Mr. Ace to weigh in on his expectations for Michigan but he must have been too busy shining up Zack Novak’s scrote. Mr. Ace is awful.

The format is a little screwed up as both of our contributors did different templates (which was my fault but I will not accept any of the blame). Seal is giving us a blurb on what to expect this year from the champs (and we need to know since that entire roster is new). Drew is breaking down his top ten. Everything else falls into place from there. Enjoy.

SEAL!
Kentucky - Calipari has another incredible class of freshmen this year – weird, right? This team has more raw talent by far than any other team in the nation. The question will be, can Calipari get them to play defense and play unselfish basketball. Last year’s championship team not only had incredible talent, but they had the chemistry and unselfishness – which this team needs to find. Nerlens Noel is NOT Anthony Davis on the offensive end, but can compare on the other end of the floor. Archie Goodwin can get to the hoop better than anyone in the country and Alex Poythress will be the 3rd guy (with the 1st two named) to go in the top 10 of next year’s draft. Their weakest position is transfer Ryan Harrow at PG. If Calipari can turn Harrow into another stud PG, this team has a chance to repeat. Prediction: Early season struggles, late success and a deep march run. Final 4 showing with 4 regular season losses.

OVERRATED – Duke. Good luck having a white guy named Plumlee carry you to the Final Four. Go away Coach K, just like your recent recruiting classes have. They are a no better than a 1 win team in March and the 4th best team in the ACC this year behind NC State, UNC, and Florida State.

Underrated – Mid Majors. This is going to be a great year if you like competitive hoops across all conferences. Not a ton of flashy names getting the hype like years past will lead to hearing more about mid major teams and seeing their success of last year’s tournament continue into this year. All of the one and done’s are giving the “teams” of players who stay together four years a better shot at winning in March. (See: UNLV, Lehigh, St Mary’s, Murray State, Creighton, and Cleveland State). Editor’s note: Ohio U is going to be terrific this year since they lost no one important from last year’s Sweet Sixteen team (HI MICHIGAN!).

Player you haven’t heard of (yet) – Archie Goodwin (UK). RAW TALENT. Best penetrating guard in college basketball. Can get a little sloppy at times, and needs work on the defensive end, but will be very exciting to watch.

Final Four – Kentucky, Indiana, Florida, Arizona
Champion – Florida over Indiana

DREW!

Drew's Top Ten...
10.) Michigan State - An underrated team in a loaded conference. Brandon Dawson who tore his ACL in the final regular season game against OSU last year sounds like he's already 100%. Plus, they boast super frosh Gary Harris from Indiana.
9.) Michigan - Overrated for now. Burke is back...and Hardaway will still probably be Hardaway. But, Glenn Robinson's sperm, Mitch McGary and Nik Stauskas are a great Frosh triumvirate. This team could go either way...but, not top 5 at the moment.
8.) Ohio State - Another Overrated for now. Nothing's for sure except Buckets and Craft. Will LaQuinton Ross, Lenzelle Smith, Sam Thompson and Amir Williams all step into their own? The talent is there...but, too many question marks to be top 5 right now.
7) UCLA - SHABAZZ MUHAMMAD. Will he be eligible for his one year in college ball? Probably. He and the other super frosh on UCLA will make for a very fun team this year. I do think Tony Parker will really struggle if they try to push the ball.
6.) Creighton - Yeah, that's right. Who wants to face these guys and their stud Doug McDermott? Not this guy. Their schedule is dog shit, too...they are going to finish the season with a ridiculous record. They didn't even attempt to schedule big non-conference games.

5.) Kansas - Because of Bill Self. That guy has that program rollin' right now.
4.) N.C. State - Love this team and hope they dangle their balls in the Michigan team's mouth during their B1G/ACC Challenge matchup. C.J. Leslie gonna be thumping that rape stick on bitches this year. Did I say I loved this team? I love this team.
3.) Kentucky - Yeah, you got retards like Nerlens Noel, but don't kid yourself Slow Seal....these Frosh aren't like last years. Kentucky plays in the dog shit SEC, which will boost their record...but, they will be getting bounced early from the Big Dance.
2.) Indiana - Tyler Zeller's (ed. I always knew that Drew was a closet Cavs fan! He likely means Cody Zeller but maybe not since he knows nothing about everything) probably the best player in the country and their home court advantage is so good that even Calipari is too scared to let Kentucky play road games there any more. Team is loaded. Crean Pie is still a huge faggot.
1.) Louisville - This team caught fire by the end of last year and they are going to be crazy good this year. They lead the country with three players on the Wooden list. Pitino's never going to have to pay for another abortion in Louisville after this year.

OVERRATED team - Duke. When a Plumlee is your best player, you aren't a top ten team. The only reason this team is top ten is because they have Duke on their jerseys.
Underrated Team - Creighton. Combine a strong mid-major team with one of the best players in the country and you've got a team that nobody wants to play.

Player you may not have heard of - Marcus Smart. He's a sick big combo guard for Okie State and will probably be a lottery pick next June. It sounds like he will even be running the point for them at 6'4”.

Final Four - Ohio State, N.C. State, Louisville, Indiana
Champion – Louisville

Thanks, fellas! I also expect Dut to chime in with his scouting report of Kennesaw State who he watched in person on Friday down in Knoxville. What is the opposite of being TOTES JELLY? As for me, I’ll take an Ohio State, NC State, Gonzaga, and Florida final four. Put me down for an NC State title. After all, they did just spoil the debut of John Cooper. We’ll be back tomorrow with another food post.

54 comments:

Anonymous said...

I still think Duke is highly overrated. They should have won last night by 20. kentuckys offense is terrible right now and they didn't have their starting PG.

Ill take the heat for the Cleveland state prediction- but in my defense I thought it was on a neutral floor. Oh and you assholes are wrong all the time.

Seal

Grumpy said...

I just want to live long enough to see Coach Cal vacate a third Final Four appearance.

Mr. Ace said...

Seal, suck Kreshdflsdkfsldajski's rat balls. Also, you picked Cleveland State because they have been good for the past few years and have a good coach, but you had no idea that they lost all their starters and were an average offensive team in the Horizon. You are the kind of person that Sportsbooks are built on. Nerlens Noel is a three year player.

BIG TEN SICK!

Apparently G$ has a very strict 3PM deadline for contributors. Tuesday night must be Sean Taylor shrine night.

Bold Prediction: Three Big Ten teams will be in the Final Four.

Regarding the Fuckeyes, I don't know about them yet. They are good, but we won't know how good until half way through the Big Ten season. My thought is LaQuinton Ross is the catalyst for this time. If he comes into his then they are a Final Four caliber team. If not, they might not make the second weekend. The same might be said about Michigan, but I think our weapons are more developed and dependable at this point.

Anonymous said...

Ace- when you are man enough to eat a cheeseburger or a steak you can tell me what I do and don't know about a college basketball team. Until then, go back to being a pussy and telling people where the cool Vegan restaurant is.

Seal

GMoney said...

Grambling brought their non-white asses up to Millett Hall last night and got lashed good.

I know it has nothing to do with the post, but the fucking Miami Marlins make me want to puke. They should be contracted immediately. They swindled all of those beaner residents into buying them a new dump and then they poop all over those people less than a year later. Jeffrey Loria deserves to be beaten to death.

But before he goes, Giancarlo to New York plz, thanks!!!

Mr. Ace said...

Seal, I see Coach K's dick is still wedged severely deep in your ass. Take the day off.

Now I want Thurman's. Fuck.

Ice Man said...

So it appears blogging and knowing everything turned out to be pretty hard, eh Seal? I guess that's what happens when you can't look at things objectively. But in your defense' Cleveland State did keep in close for the first 5 minutes. LOLZ on all your picks.

Anonymous said...

I got one game wrong, bud.

Please expand on "LOLZ on all my picks". Thats as vague as me saying "your post sucks".

Seal

Anonymous said...

Seal....GREAT call on Cleveland State yesterday. Also, don't worry about Duke....Ohio State will take care of what you guys couldn't in a couple of weeks.

Gary Harris looked like the real deal for the Spartans last night.

The Marlins are indeed a gross organization. I can't wait to see how well Jose Reyes's sweet always healthy legs stand up on that turf! If Bud Selig has any balls he will release a statement just hammerring the Marlins. As commish he has to let the trade through, but he needs to show he's disgusted by the Marlins.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

Saw Gary Harris in action when he was in HS. The kid was a beast. I think he was the youngest Mr. Indiana basketball winner ever.

GMoney said...

David Stern would squash the fuck out of that trade and likely have Miami's little weiner GM murdered.

I can't remember if Seal actually picked the Vikings to win yesterday, but I thought it was just about them keeping it close. Back off. You've all been wrong a million times and this is a really dumb thing to gloat about. If you don't stop being mean to Seal, he might not let me catch a bunch of Kai Forbath extra points next month.

Is that third Plumlee at Duke yet? You know, the one that is actually supposed to have talent.

I don't care what his numbers say, James Michael McAdoo is OVERRATED.

GMoney said...

Who is our resident Indiana HS basketball expert? ANSWER ME!!! We've got just about every state covered now.

Anonymous said...

Nobody has said anything negative about my top ten/picks yet. This doesn't feel right.

--Drew

Brady said...

Excellent post by both Seal and Drew. I feel like I learned something this morning.

That Kentucky Freshman with the Kid N' Play hair is pretty ridiculous. I'm hoping that high flat tops are making a comeback.

Grumpy said...

Drew, you contributed? I guess I missed that while laughing so hard about Seal having Coach K break one off in his last night.

GMoney said...

Drew doesn't know the difference between the Zeller boys. That is way worse than having faith in Gary Waters.

Team Seal.

Anonymous said...

G$ is as loyal to Team Seal as he is to Team Eli. I'm just embarrassed for him at this point.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

Drew - I actually agree with a lot of your post. The part I didnt was Louisville. They are going to be tough, becuase they play incredible defense, but I worry they dont have nearly enough offensive weapons to get them to the Final Four. Their matchup with UK in late December will be very telling and fun to watch.

Seal

Anonymous said...

Seal...that's fair. I think their defense will just grind out wins in March. We shall see.

Did you really say that Noel will be comparable on defense to Anthony Davis? Davis was one of the best college basketball defensive big men in like 30 years. That's a BOLD statement.

--Drew

Mr. Ace said...

You know you fucked up when G$ feels like he has to rescue you in the comments.

When I started to do my piece of this before G$ informed me I missed the deadline, I was planning on doing mine as an end of the year prediction, not top ten right now. None of this underrated/overrated wait and see bullshit. Just make predictions and have some backbone, Drew, ya fucking cunt. I hope it feels right now.

Here are some under the radar teams that I see winning a game in the tourney: OHIO(obvs), Butler will be back to form this year, as will Murray State and VCU, Davidson, Souf Alabama, Drexel and Valpo. Out of those 8 teams, I guarantee a minimum of 6 tournament wins.

The Iceman said...

Pick 1. Kentucky 4 regular season losses. LOLZ because they're already a quarter of the way there after two games.

Pick 2. Duke overrated. LOLZ because they beat your team who you have such lofty expectations for.

Pick 3. Your love for Cleveland State. No LOLZ explanation needed.

Player you haven't heard of pick. LOLZ because he plays for your favorite team. SHOCKING DEVELOPMENT! Try branching out for once.

Kentucky in the final four. Not quite LOLZ but high LOLZ potential.

Was that good enough?

The Iceman said...

Seal brings the criticism upon himself, G$. I'm sure he's a big boy and can fight his own battles. Plus I need Seal so people target him and forget about me calling for the Pistons in the playoffs. So STOP BLOWING MY COVER!

Jeff said...

My thoughts on Ohio State:

They MUST buy into playing defense.

If Craft can shoot the 3ball CONSISTENTLY, they will be great.

This team SHOULD be able to run and gun teams out of the gym and probably should try seeing as how they don't have a competent scoring big man.

Problems WILL arise when the jumpers aren't falling. They don't have a post presence right now which they can dump the ball into to get a bucket when they're cold.

GMoney said...

Louisville's season will be ABORTED on Sunday when John Cooper and the high-flying RedHawks take them dowin in the Yum Center (nice fucking name).

NC State and L'ville to start the season...ouch babe!

Iceman can annoying LOLZ all he wants at those predictions but Seal follows college hoops more (or at least equal to) than anyone else here. I trust his judgment.

I like a pissed off Ape. I think he's angling to get his old Tuesday job back. Nah, he'd rather spend his free time writing love notes to Mrs. Ace from his dog.

Anonymous said...

"Nah, he'd rather spend his free time writing love notes to Mrs. Ace from his dog."

Did he actually do that?

--Drew

Brady said...

/fingers crossed that love notes to Mrs. Ace from the dog is real.

Mr. Ace said...

That's a low blow, G$. RESPECT MY GAME!

Lets see...it wasn't a love note per say. We have a large chalkboard wall thing by the door where we put lists/messages/dirty pictures. My wife was having a rough day, won't go into details but her family is crazy. Like, wanted in several states crazy. So I did leave her a message on the chalk board that said Mack (hearts) Mom, with an incredibly detailed drawing of my dog, the great (alvin) Mack and cat. Casanova I am.

Mr. Ace, making panties wet all over facebook.

Jeff said...

"won't go into details but her family is crazy. Like, wanted in several states crazy"

I think we all want the dets of this story....

GMoney said...

Mr. Ace's sister-in-law is the female version of J-Rupe. Swear to God. She is INSANE. By the way, J-Rupe was posting yesterday about getting high. Classic J-Rupe!

But I got you good BRO!

Changing the subject a bit, if you remember that the MAC > Big Ten this year, then this is the best week of football that we've got. Tonight features Ohio @ Ball State and Toledo at NIU. I like Ball State -4.5 and Toledo +10.5. Saturday is Kent @ BG which will be discussed further on Friday.

It makes me smile that everyone was sucking OU's dick a month ago and they aren't even one of the five best teams in the conference. ELITE?

Mr. Ace said...

G$, that is a very accurate description.

The Ball St. line has moved to -7. I still think it's the play though. I'm not sure that I trust Toledo in this spot. NIU is good and has routed us 3 of the last 4 years. I just never like our chances against them.

GMoney said...

Cards up to a touchdown? Oooh, that's a stay-away game.

By the way, what are the odds that Shabazz suits up at all this year? 10%? I want to see him play but I also would like that smug fucker Howland to get fired. I am very conflicted.

Brady said...

I'm not hating on Mr. Ace's game. That's just good hustle. Notes from the dog on a chalkboard is a panty dropper.

I may take G$'s advice and bet those tonight. Your picks have been pretty solid this year.

I'm still praying for a BG-UT MAC championship. That would be the shit.

The Iceman said...

JRupe was also reported as being a spammer so now he can't PM for 18 days. He's obviously distraught over this tragic event. Getting into a PM with JRupe has to be an incredible event.

I wonder if he'll be at Club Rick's the night before Thanksgiving this year........

Anonymous said...

LOLZ @ the notes on the chalkboard. FAG.

Torri Hunter is a Detroit Tiger. SMELL MY DICK.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

LOLZ at Drew for being excited about one of the more overrated players of last 10 years.

This is off topic, but I have to bitch about my fantasy football teams. I'm currently sporting an 8 game losing streak (after starting 2-0) in the G$FL while at same time sporting an identical 2-8 record and a 6 game losing streak in the DFL. This has been a decidely unELITE FF season. My worst ever actually. Thank god for the rubes in the MSFL so that I can possibly salvage the season.

Bob Knight's hatred for Cal is simply wonderful. I don't think he ever called him by name. It was always "the Kentucky coaches." Classic Bobby.

-Damman

Anonymous said...

Damman...do you know what Torri Hunter is still doing? Also, his defense is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy better than that bum Delmon Young that we sent packing. LOLZ @ you trying to disregard that the Tigers just got better...AGAIN. Something the Indians haven't tried doing in a decade.

--Drew

Brady said...

Whoa, hold on now Drew! We just picked up Mike Aviles a couple weeks ago. ELITE utility player right there. That should be enough to put the Indians over the top.

Anonymous said...

I just looked at his numbers last year and they are actually better than I thought they were. I've just never thought to myself when Torii Hunter comes to the plate, "Oh shit, Torii Hunter is up. We're in trouble."

-Damman

GMoney said...

Who is Hunter replacing in the OF? Dirks and Baby Miggy seemed like they were becoming quality contributors. Hunter is OK still, I suppose, but not ELITE and definitely OVERRATED. Bragging about this signing means that you likely due have a quite pungent dick.

Brady, UT murdered BG once, do you really want that again? If UT loses tonight (probable), that dream is OVAH.

Needless to say, but Damman will likely never own Romo or Eli ever again.

The Indians are ALL IN on Jason Bay! TITLES! MULTIPLE TITLES!

Bobby Knight is an asshole and a crybaby.

Anonymous said...

So is OVERRATED confirmed to be in the all caps club with ELITE?

GMoney said...

It always has been. Where have you been? The All Caps club also includes:

TOTES
JELLY
OBVZ
LOL (and any other variation of LOL)
and apparently
SMELL MY DICK

Brady said...

Revenge is a dish best served on a neutral field in America's most dangerous city. I'm thinking BG's stingy defense would be up to the task.

T. Hunter is still in the league? Learn something new every day!

Anonymous said...

Does he still hate black people or Dominicans or whatever minority he hated a few years back? Only notable thing that he's ever done in his career, except play on my 2nd place fantasy baseball team.

Ide

Anonymous said...

G$...OF will be Hunter, A-Jax and Dirks. Baby Miggy needs some more time in the minors.

Let's move onto more important things...like the fact htat if Roethilsberger gets hit in the ribs wrong it will puncture his aorta and he will die. WE NEED TO SEE HIM AGAINS THE RAVENS.

--Drew

Brady said...

Rapelisberger dying on the field would be MUST SEE TV. The ratings for that would be outstanding.

Anonymous said...

Could you imagine how much fun it would be to watch the Steelers with Grumpy this weekend if they actually ran Roethilsberger out there? Every hit he'd be worried if he was going to die or not. That would be tremendous...he'd piss himself already more times than he usually does during games.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

Im waiting for the Grumpy comment of "guys please dont joke about this, as this is a very serious matter - we are talking about someones life here".

Yeah somene who rapes people. Karma is a bitch.

Seal

Prime99 said...

How are we not talking about the huge Scott Baker signing? He's better than Dan Haren anyway...

Anonymous said...

Slow Seal...the best part is that pretty much all of us would be rooting FOR him to get sacked/hit.

--Drew

Anonymous said...

I would be the first to publicly joke about his death. I would even post something derogatory on Hacksaws wall.

In fact, RIBS ON ME BOYS if he dies!!

Ide

GMoney said...

STEELERS GAY

And to Hell with those Ravens, they've got the mighty BROWNS DEFENSE next week!

Anonymous said...

Food post tomorrow?

GMoney said...

YOU KNOW IT! I gained four pounds just writing it.

Anonymous said...

Bragging about 2nd place in fantasy baseball is like highstepping across the finish line for 2nd place in a middle school track meet.

Kudos Sir!

Buke