Tuesday, September 04, 2012
Denard Robinson is awful - Everything that I said about that game was true. Shoelace couldn't out-run those studs and it didn't matter how many guys they lost because Saban and Kirby Smart are still the GOAT. If you make Denard throw the ball, you will win EVERY TIME. The guy can absolutely not throw which leads to him getting frustrated which leads him to do stupid things like trying to tackle huge guys that intercept him. That wasn't a game. That was a raping. Bama could have easily hung 50 on the not ready for primetime Hokesters. You should be thanking Saban for being merciful. And that Yelton kid is going to be a STUD. Hell, he already is. True Buckeye fans had to love this. Those fake ones that root for Michigan...U SAD BRO?
SEC! SEC! SEC! - When Denard "threw" that horrible pick six to make it 31-7 and sent me to bed, the crowd screaming SEC was just tremendous. You northerners should never forget that the South is worse than you at everything but football.
Speaking of awful, Southwick and Maxwell - The Boise/Sparty game was close but not very entertaining. My boy, Le'Veon Bell, was ELITE like I said last week because I know everything. Sparty is going to have treat Bell like they did Javon Ringer in order to win the Big Ten this year. From what I saw on Friday, he is more than capable of handling that workload. Boise covered...just like I said that they would. Chris Peterson appears to have a rebuild on his hands this year before they unload on the Big East next year (I think).
Franco Harris is the absolute worst - I was pissed to see Ohio U beat Penn State because I hate the Bobcats (although their uniforms were SICK). I get home from campus on Saturday evening, check Deadspin, and see that Franco's groomed stubble brought a cardboard cut-out of Joe Paterno into his suite with some sort of stupid word bubble calling for due process. FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE. How does a dead guy get due process anyway? I don't think that you understand what you are asking for. By the way, Penn State is going to be awful for a long ass time. Those that think that they will rebound after the sanctions end are naive.
Joey Harrington alert! - He's on the Fox panel with Erin Andrews and Eddie George! I hope that he does a weekly segment where he plays the piano!
Running up the score does nothing for anyone - Once Ohio State got up 42-10, I sort of expected that more was coming. I still don't understand why but I accept that this is the kind of thing that a dickhead like Urban Meyer does. But look at the other people who do this kind of shit: Brian Kelly did it to Navy. WHO RUNS UP THE SCORE ON A SERVICE ACADEMY? Terrorists, that's who! Lane Kiffin goes for two against Hawaii. Bret Bielema thinks that it's cute to hang 80+ on Indiana. If these guys want to keep doing that then "let him live" but you're going to get someone hurt eventually. College BRAHs don't like to get embarrassed and they WILL go dirty if you leave them no choice. And for those that say, "if you don't like it, stop it"...DURRRRRR LOOGIT ME I IS TARD!
Hey Jeff, Clemson SICK! - I ended up watching more of that game than Michigan being terrible because it was wildly entertaining. Tahj Boyd is ELITE!
The dumbest rule ever - If a guy's helmet comes off during a play, he must sit out the next play. THIS IS STUPID. Why don't they just come out and say what this rule really is: the dreadlocks on black people frighten us old white fellows. This is so dumb...fo' real.
Finally, the game that I went to - I don't know if Ohio State fans are getting smarter (not likely) or are still humbled from last year but it was actually a nice, friendly atmosphere at The Shoe. I actually had a guy shake my hand as I was leaving. I didn't care for that at all, but I am all class and reciprocated. That is more than I can say about mouth-breathing stereotype fans like some of the commenters here who take to Facebook to be all cute and gay. Yeah, I missed the spread on this game even though I picked your team to win handily. Look at EVERYTHING else that I wrote. It was ALL correct. You came out flat. The initial game plan was boring and vanilla. We would not even try to run the ball. Dysert would be great (and he was...fucking receivers couldn't catch AIDS at Tommy Morrison's house). We would fucking butcher a punt. I nailed it all...except the margin. Sue me. We had an excellent shot of going up 14-0 at the start but made no plays and only led 3-0 instead. We looked fantastic in the first 20 minutes. As soon as Devin Smith made that sick catch on that terrible pass, I knew that it was over. I was not impressed with your defense at all but OBVZ it's early and you don't face any good QBs the rest of the year (Drew asked about Danny O'Brien being better than Dysert which was a hilarious question). It's exactly what you all thought would happen and wanted to see happen. It was also pretty much what I expected and wanted to see from my team, too. We left a lot of plays on the field (which MAC teams usually do against the big boys) but no one got hurt, our STUD QB was barely touched by the apparent STREMPH of your team, and I got the feeling that this team is going to win a bunch of games this season. Maybe we'll even try to run the ball next week. So, yes, I got the margin of victory wrong, but of the three games that I previewed last week, I nailed all of them when it came to analysis.
I think that that about covers everything. That was really long. Again, a big thanks to Drew for being a cordial host before and after the game (and having two clean port-o-shitters on site!). Tomorrow I will be unveiling my NFL prediction post while Iceman takes on a rare Thursday later this week. In conclusion, Taylor Lewan was flagged for three penalties in the time that it took you to read this.