|Is J-Rupe related to Mitch Albom?|
*If you recall, I stripped Matt Barkley of his Weisman Award once he decided to be a selfish prick and return to school pointlessly to sniff more boners. Matt Barkley is a homo. Remember how Willie Mays Hays nailed batting gloves to his apartment wall for every stolen base? Barkley does that, too, but with boners that he has satisfied. Matt Barkley is a cocksucker.
Damman: Matt Barkley, QB, USC. The best player on the best team who will get all the hype all year is going to win. Plus there is not a whole lot star power among the ELITE teams. Landry Jones is a dark horse.
Drew: Matt Barkley, QB, USC. He's a pretty boy....came back for his Senior year....playing on the #1 team in the nation....playing out in L.A....not many people to challenge him. He's the biggest name on any national championship contender and he'll play up to those expectations. I think he wins in a rout.
The Wig Master: Matt Barkley, QB, USC. This really should have been in yesterday’s post; it’s a bold f’n prediction! (Ok, a little sarcasm there.) But Barkley really is poised to join the ranks of Carson Palmer and Matt Leinart. Expect to see a high-powered offense of Trojans’ past that Snoop would be proud of. Not this mickey mouse Nick Lachey shit! USC is hungry to compete in the postseason and Barkley has the experience and surrounding talent to make a run for the title. Their defense may not provide much support but who really plays defense in the PAC12 anyways.
Li'l Strut: Matt Barkley, QB, USC. This is certainly the obvious pick, but no offense will be as powerful as USC’s. Barkley arguably already had the best WR tandem in the country, but now Silas Redd will join the fold out of the backfield and in the running game. Barkley will dominate and with over 4,000 passing yards and 40 touchdowns on his way to the Heisman.
GSaul: Landry Jones, QB, Oklahoma. Really I just want to hear Billy Sims scream BOOMER over and over again like he did when Sam Bradford won in 2008. The media has already declared Matt Barkley the 2012 Heisman winner, but Jones actually has produced better numbers over his career.
Dut: Matt Barkley, QB, USC. Playing on a loaded team, dude got game, already has the hype... shoe in.
G$: Marcus Lattimore, RB, South Carolina. I don't care what MUDawg says about him coming back too early. This cat is a goddamn stud and, in my opinion, the most likely replacement of Trent Richardson on the throne of Best RB in College Football (Fuck Montee Ball).
Now how about a few predictions:
Boise State +7 @ Michigan State. THIS is the real game of the weekend. This is the Gordon Gee Bowl. Boise State has beaten someone from every big boy conference...except for the Big Ten. Now they get their chance to shut up all of the lardass midwesterners out there that no nothing about football outside of the rust belt. This game should be terrific even with both teams breaking in new starting QBs. The Broncos don't have the highest of expectations this season which is probably exactly what they prefer. I expect a low scoring game with Boise doing what they do best. Broncos 20-19.
Michigan +12.5 @ Alabama (it's a road game, stop acting like it isn't). I just don't see how this is close unless UM is at least +3 in turnover margin. You know how Denard is fast as shit and can out run most of the horribly slow Big Ten defenses? Yeah, well, Nick Saban has D-linemen that can run with homeboy. He's not going to be able to do what he does best. Denard is going to HAVE to throw. That's not good. On offense, AJ McCarron is steady and Eddie Lacy is The Wig Master's boy. If they played this game ten times, I don't think that Michigan would win any of them. Does Michigan still have that kicker that looks like a homeless Yokozuna and likes to false start before every FG attempt? That guy blows. Alabama 34-20.
I'm sure that those predictions will spark some heavy petting and debate today. We finish College Football Preview Week by crowning our champions and previewing the Miami/Little Brother game on Saturday.