1. Miami 2. Philadelphia* 3. Atlanta 4. Washington 5. New York
Thoughts: I’ve got a feeling that the Marlins are going to be really good this year. They have a good vibe about them with a new, insane, yet effective manager, a nice stadium with a horrible shrine out in centerfield, and had a very solid free agency period to go with their own home-grown talent. The entire season revolves around Josh Johnson staying healthy (highly unlikely) but I love their rotation as I actually expect a nice bounce-back season from Crazy Carlos Z. The Phillies won’t be able to score enough. That will be a problem all year long. But that starting pitching will still get them to October. This is Larry Jones’ last year in baseball. Whatever, the Braves are average just about everywhere. The Nats are a year away from a playoff push. It’s probably not a good thing when the biggest news out of Mets camp this spring was Jon Niese’s nose job that Carlos Beltran paid for. The Mets are horrible.
1. Cincinnati 2. St. Louis* 3. Milwaukee 4. Pittsburgh 5. Chicago 6. Houston
Thoughts: What do we think about the Reds giving a quarter of their payroll to Votto and ensuring that Phillips walks after the season? It’s bold. I’ll give them that. They better fucking win now. The Cardinals will always be good because they are annoying. Somehow they will get in as a wildcard even after losing Pujols and LaRussa and Chris Carpenter is out indefinitely. The Brewers will be distracted all year with the boos that will follow Braun everywhere. Last year I picked the Pirates to finally get over .500. I will never do that again. The Cubs and Astros would finish in last place in the International League. I can’t wait for the miserable Colt 45’s to join the AL next year. Those are free wins.
1. San Francisco 2. Arizona 3. Los Angeles 4. Colorado 5. San Diego
Thoughts: Exactly who were the Giants up against when they agreed to give Matt Cain 127 million dollars? He isn’t even an ace! He’s barely better than Mr. Ace (I may be going too far on that claim). It’s like they were just sitting around wondering what to do with the Zito money that will be freed up soon and just decided to give it all to their #2 starter. Still, they have the best pitching in the division. Arizona takes a step back this year as last season was more than just a little fluky. Why is it a big deal that Magic Johnson is a minority owner of a baseball team? He has virtually no say regarding anything with the on-field product. The Rockies are starting Jeremy Guthrie on Opening Day. THEE Jeremy Guthrie. They sure did rape the Indians last July though, didn’t they? San Diego…at least it’s a beautiful city.
NL MVP – Giancarlo Stanton
NL Cy – Tim Lincecum
NL Manager – Oswaldo Guillen
NL ROY – Brian LaHair? Prime seems to think that this is a real person.
1. New York 2. Tampa Bay* 3. Toronto 4. Boston 5. Baltimore
Thoughts: Other than age, this might be the most complete Yankees team that they’ve fielded in a decade. But with old guys, it can all go to shit in a hurry. Fortunately, the starting pitching looks great and the bullpen is always a STREMPH so I don’t anticipate too many problems over the course of this season. Drew always gets on me about short-selling the Rays. Not this year. They won’t score enough runs to win the division, but that starting pitching will carry them to the postseason. I don’t care about Toronto or Bawlmer County so I’m going to spend the rest of this paragraph on the Red Sox. This team is going to be a disaster. Bobby Valentine is going to piss off the clubhouse and (this is my prediction) will not be back for the 2013 season. The rotation is shit. The bullpen might be even worse. They have holes at SS, LF, and RF. The fans still hate them for the fried chicken and beer from last year. Exactly what is there to be positive about? They are going to be shit. Eat hog, Jeff.
1. Detroit 2. Minnesota 3. Kansas City 4. Cleveland 5. Chicago
Thoughts: Even with the worst infield defense of all time, the Tigers should have no problem winning this division by 8+ games. Since last year was a complete joke, I’m guessing that Valverde reverts back to his normal self and blows five saves by Memorial Day. HE SUCKS. Everything went to hell last year for the Twins so I expect a decent return to form in 2012. They really need to win the division because they are easy as shit to sweep in the ALDS. KC is a sexy pick by people that over-value prospects. I am not one of those people. The Indians can’t score enough to compete. They are in a dangerous territory right now, by the way. They went all-in with Ubaldo but addressed nothing else. Now they have holes all over the lineup, no money to spend, and the farm system is completely destroyed. Uh oh, Spaghetti-O’s. The White Sox are ass.
1. Anaheim 2. Texas* 3. Oakland 4. Seattle
Thoughts: IN MY PERSONAL OPINION, if the Angels truly wanted to and went balls out every night, they could win 110 games. They won’t, but with that starting pitching AND EL HOMBRE, they are ELITE. I still can’t believe that Texas and their no-name starters have won the last two pennants. That is kooky. I want to see Josh Hamilton completely fall off the wagon, play a game drunk, and then lay down while eating a cheeseburger in the outfield grass. Oakland and Seattle are both common street trash and don’t deserve any discussion.
AL MVP – Albert Pujols
AL Cy – David Price
AL Manager – Mike Scioscia
AL ROY – Yu Darvish
Playoffs: Tampa Bay and Philadelphia win the one game wild card round. Miami out of the NL. The Yankees out of the AL.
World Series: The last six times that Kentucky has won a national title, who has won the World Series that same year? What team only appears to win titles with a Democrat in the White House? I like the Yankees over the Marlins just because of Anthony Davis and Barry O say that it will be. It’s tradition. Liberals + Bluegrass Dominance = Pinstriped Glory. Don’t bet against history. If I WAS betting against history, I would pick Anaheim over Miami...but I'm not. Discuss.