|I'm looking for Mike Hunt!|
Anyway, on to week 14's crap-a-palooza. First stop: Heinz Field AKA America's Toilet!
Bruce Arians - The much-maligned and oft-criticized Steelers OC is pretty much rotten. I'm not even talking about his 4 goalline stuffs either. STOP RUNNING CHARITY PLAYS FOR HINES WALD. He's done. He can't play anymore. When he does get a catch, he fumbles. The Steelers have what could be the next Wayne and Harrison with Wallace and Brown, there is no need to waste plays on Smiry Joe.
James Harrison - Killing Colt McCoy was shockingly not illegal...but leading with the crown of the head was. When will you learn, you big dumbfuck? I don't think that the NFL should suspend him though. Speaking of that play...
The Browns Doctors - Good job letting McCoy keep playing! You do know that it's your job to protect him from himself, right? Staph infections and now concussions...the Browns treat their players right! By the way, this football games was a goddamn embarrassment to the NFL. Shit.
Big Ben haters - You've got to give him credit even if you hate him as a person: the guy is a fucking warrior.
Pacman Jones - There he is! There's the man we all know and love committing a huge penalty that led to a late, heart-breaking Bengals loss.
TJ Yates's parents - So nice of their starting QB son getting his folks some seats two rows from the sun. Was it possible for CBS to show these people any more?
The refs in the Lions/Vikings game - Just going to ignore that obvious facemask on the final play, eh? Uh, ok. Joe Webb sick. Christian Ponder suck.
The agility of Matt Hasselbeck - It's always awesome to see someone get hurt doing nothing.
Dolphins, Chiefs, Bucs, Panthers, and Colts - Doo-doo stains. Enough said.
The constant wussification of the NFL - I hope that you all saw that bullshit personal foul penalty that Jeff Triplette and crew gave to London Fletcher on precious Tommy Brady. Brady forgets to slide. Fletch crushes him cleanly. Flag thrown for a forearm to the head even though a forearm did not touch Brady in the head. That is some bullshit. I was furious when this happened which made me happy that I still cared about the Redskins winning football games.
Trent Williams - According to PFT, The Silverback (currently suspended for 4 games) has failed ELEVEN drug tests this year. HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!
Game-planning against the Patriots - I don't understand how Rob Gronkowski continues to be so wide open. He is the only threat in that offense that can beat you beyond 10 yards. Jim Haslett's defense appeared to not even know who he was.
Pissypants Tom Brady - Awwww, did the pretty boy not like it when his coach called him out for throwing a shitty pass? Get fucked in the butt, Brady. You know who throws tantrums on the sideline? T.O. I can't wait for New England to lose their first playoff game this year. I mean, serial, who let's the Redskins score 27 points???
Late game bonanza! - The Raiders look like a bottom-feeding Pac-12 team. The Packers are still going to run the table. The Niners lost a classic letdown game that everyone saw coming. Kevin Kolb The Hut blows. The Bills are shit. Now that that is out of the way...
Marion Barber - He lost that game. Going out of bounds out of sheer stupidity and fumbling when the game was over. Lance Briggs should kill him on the flight home. And he might.
TEBOW-FUCKING-MANIA!!! - Holy shit. This just keeps happening...EVERY WEEK. Unreal stuff. I'm buying into it big time. This is something special that we're seeing. Yeah, he was butt-herpes in the first three quarters. Ya know what, doesn't matter. I am now fully in love with Tim Tebow (if I wasn't already). I wish that I was a Broncos fan. Haters still gonna hate, but Tebow is still gonna win. I still can't believe that that just happened. UNREAL.
What the fuck, NFL - Why wasn't New England @ Tebow flexed into the Sunday Night game next week? Ravens/Chargers isn't bad, I guess, but AMERICA DEMANDS PRIMETIME TEBOW, DAMMIT!!!
Raise your hand if you're pumped for tonight's awesome Rams/Seahawks game! By the way, ESPN paid over a billion dollars to show games this epic. As always, I'm going to ask you to keep the comments on the NFL today. I already have a lengthy post planned about Saturday's Crosstown Sucker Punch but I'm waiting for all the suspensions to come down first. Deuces.