|Football coach or Prince of Darkness?|
Anyway, I guess I should post something today. And much like every good blogger looking for inspiration, my first stop was the always insightful NewJerseyNewsroom.com! The site’s motto just kills me: “OUR STATE. OUR NEWS.” New Jersey is awful in every way. But something did catch my eye courtesy of possible juiced-up gorilla reporter, Bob Holt:
One of the biggest names being heard as an early favorite to take the Ohio State coaching job in 2012 is that of ESPN analyst and former head coach of Florida Urban Meyer.
Meyer may have other ideas. He is said to have interest in succeeding Joe Paterno, 84, as Penn State coach. Onwardstate.com reports that Meyer met with Penn State Athletic Director Tim Curley and University President Graham Spanier while he was at Penn State recently for an ESPN interview.
Wait—WHAT? Is this a real thing? Most people have Urban “buying a house in Upper Arlington” already (which is totes not true, peeps). Is there a growing section of people out there who believe in "Urban going Rural"? See what I did there? I made a joke about population and land demographics. You don’t get that kind of edgy humor at NewJerseyNewsroom.com. That's back-to-back days of great jokes. Call me, Jay Leno, I will write you fresh, witty, and horseshit monologues!
I don’t want this to turn into a comment section where everyone debates who the next Buckeye coach will be (that is for a later date, trust me). But I am curious to see if anyone is buying this. Can you see Urban Meyer coaching Penn State in 2012? At first, I rolled my eyes and LOL’d my anus off, but now I’m not so sure that it would be a bad move. For a few reasons actually:
1. As far as we know, there are no sanctions from the NCAA coming like there could be at other options.
2. The velcro shoes aren’t really that big to fill. Everyone on the planet has known for a decade that Meyer is a better coach than Paterno.
3. He could finally do something that JoePa couldn’t do and that is fire Tom Bradley and that redheaded asshole who is terrible at calling an offense.
4. There is no Drew or Dut in State College (as far as I know).
So I guess I could see it. I don’t know how likely the great Bob "Grenade Launcher" Holt’s scenario is, but it’s sure as shit more interesting than PSU bringing in a turd like Greg Schiano.
I am firmly of the belief that Meyer will not coach again. I will always believe that he shouldn’t come back (years of medical school has afforded me this expert opinion on his health). But I have been lead to believe that if he did return to the sidelines and have more heart attacks, it would be in Columbus. Now, I’m not so sure. He appears to have options. Or maybe he has fallen in love with being the third member of ESPN's D-team? Thoughts?