Tuesday, April 26, 2011

O-H-Lie-O!

And this is just for his vests!
Brilliant.  Word came down yesterday that the NCAA has confirmed what we all knew:  Jim Tressel is a poopypants liar.  And it seems to all rational thinkers such as myself, that O-lie-o State's self-flagellation will not be sufficient.  That rules!  More is coming and they should also throw in a couple of punishments for that joke of a spring game on Saturday, too.  I had to watch a bit of it at the in-laws and couldn't really figure out what I was watching.  How the fuck is the defense supposed to beat the offense?  That game was more fixed than Monday Night Raw.  Don't give me that shit about injuries either, anOSU has about 150 kids on the roster.  Fag shit.  Now I'm even more certain that Toledo Tim whoops their ass in September.

If I was enlisted, I would have been deeply offended that a man with zero honor and integrity like Tress was wearing fatigues.  Dickhead.  Go write another book that is 100% bear feces, you taint bomb.  So let's talk about what was broken by millions yesterday.

*While anOSU is OK on the whole lack of institutional control thing, they are still on the hook for several major violations.  Damn, I was hoping for the death penalty!
*Tressel permitted KNOWN ineligible players to play the entire season.  Nice job, dick.  I think it's pretty obvious that the 2010 Buckeye team will now finish 0-12.  But they will still get that Sugar Bowl win for some bizarre and fucked up reason.  I guess that the Fuckeye Five should have been banned for the first 12 but once 2011 began, they were OK?  Make sense?  It does in Indianapolis.
*Tressel did not divulge to his bosses that his players were selling shit to a criminal who was under federal investigation for drugs.  What was he supposed to do here, actually notify the compliance people?  Of course not!  By the way, can I get a retroactive piss test from those five guys?  I know for a fact that one of the Fuckeye Five had a drug issue swept away three years ago.  Based on my excellent addition skills, past history of drugs + bartering with a drug dealer = ummmmm, could it be, DRUGS?  I may not be up to speed on the latest drug lingo, but I assume that "tattoos" means "crack rocks" these days.  For the last time, please don't argue about how selling their jerseys shouldn't be illegal.  Why?  What could possibly go wrong if T. Boone Pickens started buying game jerseys from kids for $20,000.  Nope, can't see anything wrong with that.
*Pryor tweeted "I love Coach Tress" yesterday.  And why shouldn't he?  The man completely fucked himself and his career over for you and you still have not done anything that Jimmy Vas Deferens couldn't have done.  Congratulations, Terrelle.  This just goes to show, for all of you college coaches reading this, never treat your players like they are your sons.  They are not.  Do not defend them like it.
*Tressel called the FBI...but not about this!  This kills me.  He hears about the possibility of all of this shit going down, calls his buddy at the local FBI, and all he wants to talk about is getting an internship for a former player interested in a career at the Bureau.  If you believe this, and not the truth that he wanted to kill this before it got out, then you are a current student at Hope School.  Go Cougars!
*In September, Jimmy Boy signed a letter stating that he did not lie to investigators.  How ironic that he lied on a form about not lying!
*It looks like Tressel wouldn't have gotten into ANY trouble, if the school didn't appeal the player's suspensions.  When they did, they found the email chain and, lo and behold, Tress fucked himself.  So if he had just told the Fuckeye Five to eat shit like he should have done, the program probably wouldn't have vultures flying over it.

Is it just me or is the NCAA basically telling Ohio State to fire Tressel?  I feel like they are strongly implying this.  It's as if they don't really want to crush the program, but they will if the school is just going to gloss over this.  But as you all know, Gene Smiff and The Geek are spineless and dickless.  Like I've been saying all along, they have to cut ties with Tress.  They really do.  Saying otherwise makes you naive and blind.  The dude lied to his bosses and the governing bodies.  Fuck his record.

Yet I want him to stay surprisingly.  I really do.  If you thought that he was conservative before, just wait.  Now he sees that he isn't bulletproof.  Gone are the days of recruiting shitbirds like Pryor or Clarett Jamaal Berry or that pedophile from Cleveland.  He may never sign a black kid again!  Keep him running the show under these coming sanctions and the days of Ohio State going 7-5 every year and losing to Michigan will become a regularity.  HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  Jim Tressel's Buckeye Ship is sinking and sinking fast.  Now the only question left is whether they release the life rafts and save everyone or allow everyone to go down with the ship.  I could leave with either one.  Especially the one with dead Buckeyes.  That would be great.

On an unrelated, big congrats go out to Z and Miranda for finally getting engaged this past weekend.  No woman wants to kick my ass more than she does! 

22 comments:

Drew said...

Expected incredibly retarded blog post was indeed incredibly retarded.

Two facts...

1.) Yesterday was NOT news-worthy except for mouthbreathers like yourself and holier than thou sports writers who need platforms. OSU already ADMITTED to all of that. Do you think the NCAA was going to come in and do an investigation and say we were too tough on ourselves? Hell no. The fact is is that they came into do an investigation...which opens up ANYTHING they wanted to investigate...and they found NOTHING more. This is a GOOD thing.

2.) Which unfortunately and ironically for you, makes yesterday a GOOD day for OSU. If you read the report, one thing was pretty clear and they are not blaming anyone at the university other than Tressel for this. So, the huge penalty that any moron thought was coming isn't. There could be something, but it won't what people wanted from the beginning.

As for your "0-12"...you dumb re re, they don't do that shit anymore. You vacate wins, which means we will most likely be 1-1 as our players were deemed eligible for the sugar bowl.

I'd hate to see Tress go like this, but it's been strongly rumored for years that his last year has been set up to be after the 2012 season....so it would come a year or two early (depending on ruling date). Time to throw FU money at Jim Schwartz if that's the case.

Anonymous said...

I personally like what Herbie said on ESPN. He basically said that OSU fans are a bunch of hillbilly's who will support Tressel and the Buckeyes no matter what. It sounded to me that he was sayin that OSU fans don't have the logical power to look at facts and know Tressel fucked up and deserves to be canned. I am starting to love this coach more than cooper because he by himself can ruin OSU for years.

NW

Grumpy said...

Herbstreit was fantastic in describing the OSU fan base and there's Drew, up bright and early, confirming every word of Herbie's analysis. Dut will be along soon with more of the same.

Loved the way Herbie proclaimed they can't recruit any more Clarett's or Pryor's.

Drew said...

Grump...how can you love that point? That's incredibly dumb. Yeah...let's not recruit top five players any more...then we'd be like...oh wait...Miami of Ohio! Those kids had offers from everyone and Clarett was an honor roll student who had a ND offer as a Junior. Let's not recruit that kid. Nobody knew that he would go all schizo once he got to college.

NW...nothing that comes from this will put OSU anywhere close to the ruins that Tress put Michigan football the last five years and still going.

GMoney said...

Yep not newsworthy at all...except that it was covered everywhere. You vacate your wins and those are losses to me, bitch. Congrats on getting stomped by EMU and The Ohio's last year.

You stay away from Schwartz.

You're going to lose the only decent coach you've had for 30 years in place of Luke Fucko...yep, good day for the program indeed!

Drew said...

G$...who loses on American Idol every week is basically covered everywhere too...doesn't make it newsworthy. Like I said...NOTHING changed...the NCAA just agreed with everything and found nothing more. So fucking newsworthy.

I'm glad you view them as losses...I still view them as wins.

Luke Fickell will be the coach for five games...and then Tress the rest because the NCAA will take way too long to rule.

Ide said...

We'll just replace him with Urban Meyer.

Mr. Ace said...

Nothing newsworthy? I agree no new violations came out of this, but the degree to which Tress lied his fucking face off was magnified quite a bit. Oh right, he just called the FBI to get a former player an internship.

I agree that what Herbie said about the fan base was pretty hilarious, but it wasn't anything he hasn't said before. And I agree with you Drew that you can't just stop recruiting talent because of this. But maybe recognize the red flags that are there and do some more proper vetting. With Pryor there were flags everywhere; sleezy mentor, corvette, getting tossed out of basketball games...the kid was gonna be trouble. But recruiting is a crapshoot and some kids just aren't gonna make it.

However, if you don't cover up for these kids and line up shady gigs for them then you probably go a long way in protecting your ass instead of creating the monster Tress created.

Anonymous said...

Wow Ace.. Look at all those red flags! That's interesting you say that considering Michigan fans were going crazy when they had a shot at Pryor 3 years ago. Were those "we want pryor" chants at the basketball game just my imagination? Are all Michigan fans this stupid/hypocritical or is it just the Wal-Mart Wolverines like Ace and NW? How is Demar Dorsey working out for you? He had no red flags, right?

Who cares if they strip last season? The only way ill be upset is if they ban us from bowls for a year, and I don't see that happening.

Herbstreit is a douche. For a guy that sucks off USC and the dirtiest conference there is (SEC), how can he say that OSU shouldn't recruit these players?

Dut

Anonymous said...

The letters issued by the NCAA yesterday did not reveal anything that wasn't expected by anyone but delusional OSU fans. I have been saying all along that nobody was going to buy Tressel's confidentiality argument. He lied to cover it up. The letters were just a confirmation that the NCAA feels the same way.

You cannot overlook the fact that the NCAA did not cite OSU for "Lack of Institutional Control" or "Failure to Monitor". This is HUGE. This means OSU will likely avoid USC type penalties (i.e. bowl bans and scholarship reductions).

With all this being said, I do feel 2011 will be Tressel's last year in Columbus. He lied. With that will come controversy and distractions. He will "resign" at the end of this season. I honestly feel like it may be the right thing, too. As was already pointed out, he wasn't going to be around for much longer. Until he recently extended his contract through 2014, it was set to expire after next season. It would be best for OSU and Tressel in the long run.

-Lil' Strut

Anonymous said...

Look at who was Michigans coach, dick rod and tressel are in the same coaching ring when it comes to recruiting players with shading past. Never heard this shit when carr was coaching. Even after all this shit hit the fan, Tressel still grants a scholarship to a kid who was touching underage girls. Don't get me wrong that is a good move for a kid in high school, but it should have brought up something about his character. He probably won't be at Ohio State long, because he will have rape charges against him by his second year.

Drew said...

Another point on Herbie's ridiculous comment....was he saying the same thing about the "Reggie Bush type players" after USC got the book thrown at them? Nope...he was too busy sucking from teh cock that is Pete Carroll.

Grumpy said...

Drew, newsworthy or not, new info or not, you should be ashamed and embarrassed for the shame and disgrace this coach has brought upon your university. If I were an OSU alum or fan, I would be screaming for his head.

Nobody is arguing the institution had anything to do with this; from all appearances it was one man who lied, lied about the lie and then tried to cover it all up. How can you not be pissed at him?

Mr. Ace said...

Dut, Michigan didn't have a Mo Clarrett situation just a couple years prior. Different situation. I saw the red flags with Pryor. I still wanted him because M was in desperate for a QB and M football has never had anything that resembles a scandal like this.

Tress catered to these kids and created this environment. He deserves the axe.

I still don't buy that the institution didn't know about this, somebody was just smart enough to cover the trail.

GMoney said...

What ever happened to Hooley anyway? Because he should totally sue the fan if they fired him.

Anonymous said...

After all of this, I think most Ohio State fans (including myself) want Tressel to resign after this season. Let the Urban Meyer talk begin!

Dut

Ide said...

Not sure, Graig. I heard they settled on a "mutual agreement to part ways". Either way, and I think I speak for everyone, Captain Crushed Velvet and Rothman are fucking terrible.

Drew said...

G$...That doucher Hooley basically said that 97.1 bought out the rest of his contract, which I think was just one year. So, essentially he was fired but they paid him on his way out.

Grump..I don't think I ever said at anytime that I wasn't disappointed or frustrated with Tressel for this situation. I do want him to stay though as I think the good he has done (beyond winning a ton of football games) far outweighs this transgression. If he was a bad coach, would I think the same? No and that makes me a hypocrite, but people good at their professions always earn more of a leash than those that are not.

I actually think Ace has been pretty good in his comments today...not much I'd feel like trying to disagree with.

Daniel said...

I think I deserve some reparations from all of this. The value of my tickets has declined significantly this year, and had several potential buyers walk away because of all the uncertainty.

I may have to remove JT as one of my references on my resume, which was invaluable in this area before. If I ever become unemployeed for an extended period of time, I'm sueing someone.

Mr. Ace said...

Because I'm awesome.

GMoney said...

Daniel, you can always get a job with the FBI!

Rothman and Demetrius are the worst thing to happen to radio since Ke$ha.

The Iceman said...

This is super late and I'm sure this comment will fall on deaf ears, but it really kills my how OSU fans are defending Tressel throughout, yet if the shoe was on the Michigan foot the OSU fan base would be slaughtering the UM program. Hypocrisy rules!