Tuesday, March 01, 2011

The Middle Finger: Richard Hamilton

Yep, I'm dusting off this old gem. I have never shied away from admitting that in 2004, I was rooting like crazy for the Pistons to beat the Lakers in the NBA Finals. The Lakers had grown stale to me and there was something sort of cool about a team with no superstars that played ultimate team basketball. As time went on and my Cavs became more and more of a player in the Central division, the more I grew to hate Detroit. It wasn't anything personal, it was just that they were holding onto the spot that I wanted my team to get. Now, the Pistons are a disaster. It starts at the top like most disasters do and I have wasted too much computer words talking about how awful Joe Dumars is. He should have been relieved of his job the minute that he called Charlie Villanueva's agent/chemotherapy nurse. But it's not entirely Joe D's fault. I mean, sure, he made an awful hire for his head coach with John Kuester. If you are picking off of the Mike Brown coaching tree, you are clueless. But still, I put a huge chunk of the blame on the players themselves who play with no pride or passion or "want to". It's embarrassing...especially in a broke ass but hard-working city like The D. I'm singling out one particular assfuck today who I used to respect but those days are gone. He has completely shit on his reputation as a good guy in a little less than 2 months. He currently embodies what every non-NBA fan incorrectly stereotypes the modern pro basketball player...a greedy, selfish, me-first, pussified baby that cries when things don't go their way.

This, uh, years (I guess) Middle Finger goes to the "Black Musshel" himself, Rip Hamilton.

So earlier this winter, the Pistons decide that they will try to trade the ridiculous contract that they gave Hamilton a few years ago. It was mind-numbingly stupid at the time and even worse now that he can't play anymore. Instead of playing him 25-30 minutes a night and allowing the rest of the league to see how much he sucks, Kuester just went ahead and benched him. Made sense to me. They could hide behind the excuse of keeping his old ass healthy or something but really use it as a mirage to hide his shittiness in hoping that some stupid team like the T-Wolves or the Clippers takes the bait. But no one did. And Rip became a malcontent. And then a month or so ago, it has recently leaked that Hamilton screamed at his head coach in the locker room in a way that people have said that it was the worst dressing down that they'd ever heard. Professionalism at it's finest, folks!  Words? At least Spree had the balls to choke his coach.

On Friday, while some reports are conveniently conflicting, Hamilton led a mutiny against Kuester in which 6-7 guys failed to show up to morning shootaround. Other than Ben Wallace, I don't really buy any of the other bullshit excuses that the players made for missing. Rip, though, did not even bother with an excuse. He just straight up was insubordinate to the organization in one of the most pathetic coup d'etat's ever. What was this going to accomplish exactly? What was his goal here? Did he want to come off like an even bigger asshole and baby? Was he trying to get traded? Was he willing to do whatever it took to get out of Detroit? Sounds like it to me...BUT WAIT!

Later on this weekend, it was revealed that the Pistons agreed to trade this bum to none other than the Cavs! The Cavs have their big trade exception from the Heat debacle (where they can acquire anyone up to 14.5 million for free somehow), would buy him out at something like 80% of what he's owed, the Pistons would give us a protected 2012 first rounder (pretty good haul), and everyone would walk away happy. But what's this? HAMILTON SAID NO! He would not agree to the buyout which would have made him a free agent which would have put him on a contender (the Bulls/Knicks/Celtics) which would have given him a fresh start which would have given him one more shot to win a title. And he turned it down for reasons that no sane person will ever understand. Either he is beyond greedy and wants every penny that he's owed, he knows that he can't play anymore, or maybe both.  It's probably both.

Either way, this guy is an asshole. Fuck you, Rip Hamilton, your bitch shenanigans have not gone unnoticed here. While I would love to see you waste away on the Pistons bench with your stupid headgear for two more years laughing at T-Mac fart jokes, the idea of you being "EXPORTED FROM DETROIT" makes me giddy. So have fun with your well-deserved Middle Finger this week, Richie.  For as horrible as my Cavs are this year (and they are), at least I rarely question their effort.  And that's more than I can say for the veterans on this Pistons team.

Enjoy running the baseline in the Turkish League, douche lord.

32 comments:

Grumpy said...

It's strange. This guy was a model citizen and teammate for years and then just goes bat shit whacko.

Anonymous said...

Your missing a lot of the story here G$ and im not going into details. I don't have time and its not worth my time. The dude hates his coach. He gets benched. Moral of the story. Its not Rip to blame. All the blame is on Kuester for being a fucktard. He knows Kuester will not be back next year. So why not say no to a trade and soak up the EASY MONEY ! He loves Detroit. Detroit fans have backed him for years. Get a new coach in there and see what he has left. The guy can still play.

GMoney said...

No please go into the details because I fail to see where he is right here. Just because you hate your boss doesn't give him the right to be a turd.

If he could still play then they would play him.

Drew said...

Who the fuck is Anonymous defending Rip?

As a huge Pistons fan, I couldn't agree more with this blog posting. Fuck Rip in his ass-hole adn fuck Tayshaun too. They've been locker room cancers ever since Chauncey got traded. They have both ruined whatever legacy they hoped to have in Detroit, by behaving this way too.

Who knows how really bad of a coach Kuester is. The fact that he's had ass-hole veterans ruining his locker room the whole time, really hasn't given him a chance. He definitely will be fired whenever the Pistons get their ownership situation taken care of, but it's not his fault players like Rip are behaving like fucking divas.

Rip is just a huge whiny douche of a man.

Anonymous said...

When your the star player and you get benched. Of course your gonna be pissed. I can see a game or two. but when it turns into 7,8,9 or more. Tensions are gonna flare and there is gonna be a blow up. This happens more then you think. It just goes unoticed usually. Kuester knew this and just makes his exit all them more easier. He doesnt want to coach. If you watch the games. Kuesters shows no passion, enthusiasm, nothing. He just stands there half the time with his eyes closed, like he is in a daze, or just stands there like he is staring at a wall.

Obviously something is up. Because there are several players that disagree with Kuesters. and his style. The final straw that put me over the edge was when he had his 5 starters on the bench the other night for the whole 4th quarter.. THAT SHOWS ME RIGHT THERE KUESTERS DOESN'T CARE IF HE WINS OR NOT !!! If he did. Starters would have been in the game !

GMoney said...

Hold it right there. Rip is not a superstar and people who think that he is are part of the problem.

And who cares if he sat his starters for the fourth quarter? Doesn't look to me like those 5 have been winning many games this year anyway.

Jamison out for the year and the Clips lose to the kings...hello first two picks!

Jeff said...

Anon - you show me a coach that every one of his players agreed with and I'll show you Wade Phillips. He sure turned out great!

I don't care what sport we're talking about because I could care less about the NBA, but coaches need to let players know that they are in control of the team. The only way to do that is to bench your best players when THEY ARE NOT PLAYING HARD. It doesn't matter if they are the starters or not, if their effort is lacking they give you no better shot at winning than the backups do.

Jeff said...

God Damn the NBA sucks, especially when the Lebron-less Cavs are stealing TV time from my CBJ. Big game tonight!!

Fuck the Canucks!!

Drew said...

I think anonymous is Rip Hamilton. There is no other way to understand such lunacy as defending Rip Hamilton. G$'s correct...if you think Rip is a superstar then you probably shouldn't post anymore on the subject.

Outside of Greg Monroe and I guess Will Bynum, the whole team is just a bunch of whiny bitching fags. It's too bad it's not like the NFL, so they can't just cut a bunch of them.

The best part of that boycott is that T-Mac and Chris Wilcox were a part of it. Like T-Mac is going to find another coach in the NBA that is willing to start him at PG. I don't think anyone gives a fuck if Chris Wilcox shows up to anything either.

The Iceman said...

For the first time, I couldn't agree more with Drew.

"Its not Rip to blame. All the blame is on Kuester for being a fucktard."

That could be the single most moronic statement ever muttered. I don't give a bloody hairy fuck if Rip doesn't like his coach. I fuckin HATED my high school coach. So did the rest of the team. The guy was going crazy, was stuck in the 80's style of coaching and was never able to relate to the players. His game plans were laughable and we won based on sheer talent...not because of his 1946 Harvard Flex offense. He was the worst kind of coach.

But guess what? Did we stage a mutiny? Did we attempt to get him fired because we clashed? No. We played...and we played our asses off. Not for him, but for us. We respected the game too much. We respected all of the playes that came before us too much. We respected our dads too much who played in that gym before us. We understood that neither the coach nor ourselves were bigger than the game and even though we had a shit fuck barking orders, we left everything out on the court regardless. This is 100% Hamilton's fault. Not to mention Hamilton is getting paid sack load of money to do something people do for fun. Fucking faggot.

Sorry about the rant...but as a guy who played college basketball and would have killed for a chance to play in the NBA, this kind of shit infuriates me. Don't like your coach? Fuck you. You don't get paid to like the coach. You get paid to do your fucking job...which is show up to shoot around and play fucking basketball.

Mr. Ace said...

Iceman...you leave Walt out of this.

I think Dumars deserves a lot of blame in this situation as well. Yes, he has done horrible things to the team over the last five years. That's obvious. But it's pretty clear that those veteran players lack just as much respect for him as they do the coach. Dumars could, or at least could have before the situation blew up, step in and be a mediator and let these players know what is expected of them because he has been their before. But he chose to sit back and do nothing while his franchise deteriorated.

But yeah...fuck Rip Hamilton.

GMoney said...

I agree with ace. You leave walt's coffee breath alone. Leave him alone!

Regardless of where all the blame falls here, why the fuck is he refusing the buyout to get out of there???

GMoney said...

And yes, Jeff, go Jackets!!!

Drew said...

Exactly. He wants to be a huge bitch and shit on the coach....then they find a way to get him bought out since it's impossible to do without an owner right now in Detroit and he basically says "no thanks". What a fucking ass-hole. Take your buy-out...go to Boston or Chicago and play some meaningful basketball and try to parlay that into a new contract for next year. Instead it seems like he's more worried about organizing boycotts and playing tummy sticks with Tayshaun in their hotel room.

Mr. Ace said...

Tummy sticks with Tayshaun...great trivia team name.

Tony B. said...

Rip is a bitch, plain and simple. The coach might be awful. He also might have a pair of iron testicles to sit a guy who was once almost a "star" and now has a skill set that has diminished like Dick Clark's ability to speak. There is plenty of blame to go around for the Pistons' issues and I enjoy it all as a Bulls fan.

G$, he would refuse a buyout if it resulted in him getting paid less, which I assume would be the result.

I wanted to defend Rip and say that the "Pistons got 99 problems but Rip ain't 1" but defense for this asshole would be as flimsy as the Carolina Panthers D.

The Iceman said...

The only thing good I will say about Walt is that guy could make a hell of a pizza. Thursday film sessions at Casa De Walt was a joyous day.

Tony B. said...

I think our team learned the 1946 Harvard Flex offense the first week of Freshman practice for general purposes and we never went back to it ever again. I would have had to kill myself if we kept running that at the Varsity level.

The Iceman said...

The worst part about the flex offense was that EVERYONE fucking knew it so the opponent would anticipate the screens and cuts before they would happen. Some teams would actually yell "Flex! Flex!" when we set up in it. It was a completely useless offense.

GMoney said...

Much like Kuester, Walt got the most out of every little shit that he ever coached...all with a haircut that would make Jimmy Johnson greene with envy.

Anonymous said...

Obviously Rip didn't want to co to Boston or Chicago. Maybe he hates them? Who knows. Maybe he wants to stay in Detroit ! Rip is the best player on the Pistons other than maybe Stuckey. Star of the team. Not star of the league.

Drew said...

Anon...

You are a full-blown retard. Go jump off a building and spare society the minimal chance of yourself procreating.

Mr. Ace said...

Anon, you are the douche lord of the month. Congrats. You should have been swallowed.

GMoney said...

13/2/2 before getting rightfully benched. STAR!!!

Stay in detroit and lose while not playing or go to a contender and possibly rejuvenate his career? Not a tough choice at all.

Anons name must Hichard Ramilton.

The Iceman said...

I'd take Will Bynum at shooting guard/small forward over Hamilton any day...and that midget's a fuckin point guard. At least Bynum gives a shit.

Anonymous said...

Love all the talk from all the Shitty Cav fans !

The Iceman said...

I'm a Pistons fans...and fuck Rip Hamilton. He's not bigger than Piston basketball and right now he thinks he is.

Anonymous said...

I don't think he thinks he is bigger than the Pistons. He didn't want traded. He has that right. He wants to be a Piston. That being said. You say this team has quit. I guess being 5.5 games out of the 8th spot shows they have quit.. I guess to be only 5.5 out of the playoffs and have quit and not try is good then.. Thats the way you guys make it out to be.

I will tell you this. Rip has 11 other guys on that team supporting him and backing him up. His little spats with Kuesters has nothing to do with how the team plays.

Some people should read a little more into this before posting a blog or commenting on it.

Drew said...

Congrats on being the single dumbest poster to ever post here.

"He wants to be a Piston"....then play and be a great teammate...don't be a faggot trouble-maker.

Being "5.5 games out of the 8 spot" in the East doesn't mean they have quit...it means some players like RICHARD HAMILTON have quit. Indiana, Charlotte and Milwaukee have better records you moron.

"Rip has 11 other guys on the team supporting him and backing him up"...no he doesn't. The Yahoo! article clearly stated that many of the young players felt very uncomfortable and wanted to stick up for Kuester when Rip dressed him down in practice, but they didn't feel they could. There were also six players that did show up to shoot-around. Maybe you should read up more about it or get tested for Downs.

Anonymous said...

Tough to play when your on the bench. His benching had nothing to do with the way he was playing.

GMoney said...

He makes 8 figures and averaged 13/2/2. You are the dumbest fucking person on the planet.

Anonymous said...

You guys love to believe the media. You actually think there gonna tell us the truth of what went on behind closed doors? Fuck No !