Friday, March 11, 2011

Does JT Regret TP?

Chris Cicero has told me that you guys need new whips.
I've actually been quite busy recently so we're going to hit a few topics today and then get out.  In and out, in and out.  Just like your dad and Shook's Son.

1. Colin Cowherd actually makes a great point...
-As we continue to pound the shit out of this Jim Tressel Lying story, I think that Colin asks a good question.  He had Herbie on on Tuesday when this broke and concluded the segment by asking Kirk, "do you think that Tressel regrets bringing Terrelle Pryor in"?  Herbie hemmed and hawed and never answered it.  You know damn well that he wanted to yell, "YES HE DESERVES TO DIE AND I HOPE HE BURNS IN HELL!"  Or just a "yes, life would have been much easier without that guy".  Which is true.  Pryor hasn't done anything that Troy Smiff or Mr. Molecules didn't and he has only brought a negative spotlight.  He hasn't really matured as a person.  He's still an absolutely awful interviewer and Tweeter due to his idiocy.  But what do you guys think? None of us know Tress, but do you think he regrets TP?

2. Speaking of which...
-The more and more that I read into this, the more and more that I'm beginning to think that Gene Smith is involved heavily in this scandal.  Almost that he has the most to lose in this once the truth comes out.  Just what I'm thinking.  And Gordon Gee is still a fucking hypocrite (see: everything he said and did at Vandy compared to what he is doing and saying this time around in Columbus).

3. Hey, I'm OK with breaking another scandal here...
-I had to drive down to campus yesterday to meet with an oral surgeon.  While on Neil Ave, I am behind a big ass black Escalade with license plate "ZB 44".  I don't know if the Boren family is loaded or not, but I am willing to say, JIM TRESSEL BOUGHT HIS FULLBACK A CADILLAC.  All I know is that when I was in college, I drove a badass '91 Grand Am and NOT a fucking 'lac.  Dirty.  Ass.  Program.

4. Hey, G$, tell me more about the dentist...
No problem, voice in my head.  So, it's official.  After meeting with my Indian oral surgeon yesterday, I'm getting my wisdom teeth yanked on 4/7.  They've given me the option of being knocked out or awake.  What do you recommend if you've had this done?  I'm pretty sure that I could deal with the pain but the needles in my mouth is not something that I'm looking forward to.  I'm leaning toward the no nitrous now but that could go either way.

5. Table-Gate is probably over...
-If you remember this post from last Thursday, I was having issues with regarding the patio set that I bought for the wife.  Well, they were scheduled to deliver the set last Thursday at 6:30 and they didn't show up until 7:30 after I had already left for Trivia Night.  The driver blocked our entire street unnecessarily.  It's a 91 pound box and he didn't have any sort of jack or dolly to move it.  So he set it in our front yard and drove away.  For three hours we had a big box sitting in the middle of our yard which I had to push to the backyard when I got home that night.  Pain in the ass.  So Friday night, I send CSN an email wondering where our chairs were for the "Woodard Landing Chateau Outdoor Dining SET" which was the actual title of the product that I purchased.  I get a reply email from them on Saturday that it, in fact, was NOT a set.  By "set", they really mean, "just the table".  Fucking gay.  I called the wife to tell her and she immediately said that we were sending it back.  Problem was that I already took it out of the box and started tearing the box down to fit it in the trash can (because I'm impatient and the box was preventing me from parking in the garage).  But I set up for the box to be sent back on Wednesday night and after 3/4 of a roll of duct tape, the table was ready to roll and it's on its way back to Dallas.  The refund is in process and we are again looking for the 2010 Christmas/Birthday present for She$.  This was a complete fucking nightmare.  NEVER buy anything from

6. Finally, Damman wants YOU...
-Peckers, last year, Damman ran an NCAA pool that was awesome.  I was horrible at it but I thought that it was better than filling out a bracket.  In fact, his pool is the only gambling that I will do for the tourney.  It's pretty simple.  You have to pick the winner of every game (the day of the game or the night before) and by how much they win by.  You get points for nailing it correctly and lose points for picking the wrong winner, etc.  Lowest score wins.  I can assure you that it's fun.  He sends out reminders to get your picks in so don't worry about that.  If you are interested, EMAIL ME, and I will forward your email to Damman (or FB message him) for the rules.  It costs $20 and he will break knees if you are a deadbeat.  I will say it again, I PREFER THIS OVER FILLING OUT BRACKETS.  Get in.

That about covers it here.  I guess it wasn't as quick as I thought.  That's what happens when you BREAK STORIES though.  I'm getting hammered at Park St. Patio tomorrow with it.


Anonymous said...

The Borens are fucking loaded. That's why Justin Boren was able to transfer to a B1G school and not care if he had a scholarship. Even if his parents didn't buy it from him, I'm sure he was just test driving it for the weekend!

It wasn't just TP who broke the rules. However, I got a feelin coach Tress would have turned the guys in if TP wasn't involved. I really think JT is going to have a hard time recovering from this. Bring me a recharged Urban Meyer next year please.

Because I have superior genes to everyone, I don't have wisdom teeth at all. Its called evolution. However, if I had to get surgery, I would choose to get knocked the F out. Even though you can't feel them digging out your teeth, I'm sure its still awful. Never turn down drugs when they're offered- that's what I always tell the kids.

Damman's pool will be 10x better since I will be building the excel model to track points. I haven't looked at it yet, but it will be about as advanced as Watson.

I'm on my way to the great state of New Jersey. Burgers for the boys!


Grumpy said...

Big Pussy=nitrous.

GMoney said...

I'm actually leaning toward the nitrous just because its a great nap and drugs rulz!

No, the borens just had dick tressel take care of the 'lac I'm sure just like the old days.

Mr. Ace said...

Take the drugs and go to sleep. I have to have a tooth cut out of my jaw in high school and they gassed me but didn't put me to sleep. But the gas made me puke while they were drilling so I projectile vomited pork chops, tons of blood and bone chips at the same time. A great experience.

I have a question for you tools. My parents are coming down tomorrow for the Fuckeyes game but I won't be able to meet them til after 3. So what is a good place that I should send them to to watch the game? Some place that has the Columbus feel but won't be fucking packed...and has bud light and wings. Suggestions please.

Anonymous said...


From my understanding, Zach Boren's dad is a very successful businessman.


Send them to a Roosters.

-Lil' Strut

Anonymous said...


Also, when I had my wisdom teeth pulled, they didnt even give me an option, they just did it. They told me to start counting back from 100 and I thought "I am going to fight this and be the first person to get all the way to zero" The last thing I remember is the number 84. I then woke up feeling numb and dazed with the oral surgeon cleaning everything up. The only shitty thing is that they will probably wheel you out in a wheelchair after, which is kind of humiliating. I fought it and almost started swearing at the aides in an attempt to tell them I was ok, but they insisted for liability reasons.

-Lil' Strut

Anonymous said...

Lil strut- by "I woke up and the oral surgeon was just cleaning up"... Do you mean wiping semen off your face?

I would send them to the varsity club or eddies.


GMoney said...

LS, if I knew that you couldn't defeat anesthesia, I never would have drafted you in the 2nd round!

If you had superior genes, dut, you wouldn't be going to jersey now.

Ace, just send them to Private Dancer. Ill have Drew save them a seat.

The Iceman said...

Tressel does not regret pryor...for this reason: as much as pryor has failed to live up to the massive hype, the fact remains that OSU doesn't win all the games they have with joe bauserman or whatever shitty backup was taking advantage of a free education at the time. And we all know that as long as you're winning, shadyness is tolerated. So kinda like herpes...what tressel is going through will never go away & although its really uncomfortable for him right now, eventually the discomfort will fade & he'll be able to manage the problem with medication...or as we like to call it: winning. Or time. Or both.

Be a man. Stay awake. Listening to the doc rip a tooth out of my mouth was an experience like no other. Plus you feel fuckin unstoppable afterwards. If you can take listening to your own tooth being torn out, you can take anything.

Anonymous said...


No semen on my face, but it was very similar to that episode of Seinfeld where Jerry gets put under and wakes up to find the Dentist and his assistant putting their clothes back on.

-Lil' Strut

Anonymous said...

Def take the nitrous - quick and painless, and when you wake up its like your completely hammered, then you have no hangover. Its great. Plus who wants to hear your teeth being ripped out of your head.

Fear the Roo.


Anonymous said...

Don't get the gas, be awake why they do it. When I had mine taken out I was awake and you could hear the tooth get punched out it was a cool feeling. By the way after that you are not suppose to smoke or each because it may cause dry socket and they then have to go back in and scrap that shit out.


Drew said...

Sorry for being late to the party....I'm sure you all missed my comments already.

1.) Iceman nailed it. We were gonna be fucked for a couple years at QB without Pryor AND he basically set Michigan football back five years. Kid has been gold.

2.) Gene Smith's cock is bigger than yours.

3.) Tressel definitely paid for that Escalade and it's a slding scale of worthiness. That is why Mike Brewster has his own helicopter and Pryor gets the Gulfstream jet.

4.) I still have my wisdom teeth. Every dentist I've ever had says I will never need to get rid of them either. I also never had braces or a retainer. My teeth are perfect.

I'd take the gas though. I'd also have someone drive me home that I wouldn't be scared of what I would say to them all gassed up. I've had some buddies that have done some funny shit after that operation. I had one buddy in high school whose Mom was there to drive him home. He asked her if he could drive and she said no he's fucked up. His response was, "I've driven way worse than this". He doesn't remember that conversation.

5.) You should have pooped in that box before sending it back.

6.) I will think about this Damman thing.

Tony B. said...

Get knocked out G$. You especially don't want to be awake if they can't pull one of your teeth out and have to smash it into pieces to get it out. Ignorance is bliss for mouth raping.

Anonymous said...

I opted out of being put to sleep. And i think the recovery went better because of it. Originally they did not give me the option and were going to just knock me out but i brought it up that my dental insurance would not cover the cost to knock me out. Saying that, the whole process sucked but if i had to do it again, i would still opt out of being put to sleep.

-Big Strut

Jeff said...

Hell yea get knocked out! What other time can you legally od and pass out while professionals monitor you so you don't die?

I've had the same feeling that there is probably another person in this mess that tressel might be taking the fall for. There is no way that tressels eyes were the only ones to see that email. Even if he didn't forward it, but I think he did and I think ole Genie was the recipient.

GMoney said...

Need OT to beat a below average NW team? Good to see the real diebler back though.

Jeff said...

Sully should've had over 30 free throws, just because he's better than everyone else doesn't mean we should even the playing field and call one out of every five fouls against him. It's March, just win baby even though I wouldn't mind a loss tomorrow to get the rest, unless it's against Bitchigan.

Mr. Ace said...

Fuck the Fuckeyes