Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Middle Finger: BJ Upton

We as sports fans don't ask for much.  We want our teams and players to be competitive.  We want them to win while at the same time realizing that that isn't always possible.  We want them to stay out of trouble and be decent role models.  We want them to work hard and hustle.  We just want them to give a shit.  Because the fans do...probably too much.  Just act like losing hurts you as much as it hurts us.  It's that simple.  Unfortunately, some recent athlete behavior has my blood boiling.

Let's be honest, no one likes Randy Moss.  Is anyone a Randy Moss fan?  He only tries when the ball is thrown his way and he never gives any effort when asked to block.  It's embarrassing.  And the sad thing about it is that he has been able to get away with it for all these years.  For all the highlight reel catches that he's made throughout his career, whenever I see him dogging it as if he were pouting, it infuriates me.  And this is why people hate him.  It's because fans live by the mantra that they would kill to have his skills and his position in life.  Some even say that they would play professional sports for free if they could.  That is obviously bullshit because the best part of being a pro athlete is the money, fame, and lifestyle that they live.  But nevertheless, this is why fans say that.  Because they know that they have zero talent, but at least they would hustle and genuinely love to be playing the games that they love.

That being said, this week's Middle Finger goes to one of the biggest wastes of talent in baseball:  BJ Upton.

On Sunday, BJ Upton embarrassed himself, his team, himself again, himself a third time, and the game of baseball by fucking jogging after a ball hit in the gap which ended up leading to the winning run for the Diamondbacks.  And calling THAT "jogging" might be a stretch.  He used some half-assed excuse that he thought the LF was going to get it eventhough the ball was hit closer to him and CFer's are supposed to assume that every ball is theirs unless they get called off anyway.  Even after realizing that it was his to get, he never picked up the pace.  He just kept dogging it.  You've all probably seen the highlight by now anyway.  After the inning was over, Evan Longoria did what he was supposed to do and got in that fucker's face about it.  Upton had the nerve to run smack back at him eventhough BJ pretty much sucks, has been a bust in the league, is already ten times worse than his little brother, can't hit, and his team is on an amazingly shitty streak of crappy play.

Longoria was being the leader of a team in desperate need of leadership while Upton continued to be the prima donna that he always has been.  Keep in mind, this is coming on the heels of Hanley Ramirez getting destroyed publicly for doing the exact same thing a month or so ago.  He should know that you can't do that.  And Hanley is actually, you know, a superstar.  Upton can be replaced...EASILY.  Which brings me back to my initial point:  just show us that you care.  Don't rub your disinterest in the faces of your fans.

You may not be having a good day at the plate.  Your girl may have given you a toothy BJ the night before and it hurts to walk.  If your Miguel Cabrera, you may still be drunk.  But it doesn't take a ton of effort to hustle on and off of the field.  Like I said, fans are easy to please.  We just don't want to be taken for granted and asked to accept diva behavior.  It isn't hard.  It's why little losers like John McDonald and David Eckstein have been in the league for so long despite having zero talent.

Go fuck yourself, BJ.  And what kind of a grown man calls himself "BJ" anyway? Not even a loser like Byron Mullens goes by BJ anymore. No wonder you behave like a child.  So enjoy your Middle Finger, you spoiled little shit. Remember, the job of the CF (and every fucker on the field) is to PLAY HARD!

In short, quit being a pussy, BJ Upton.  But as a Yankees fan who realizes that Tampa is crumbling before our eyes, KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, BJ!!!  You are a valued member of the Rays' demise!

13 comments:

GMoney said...

I'm about 100% certain that Clifton Lee is pitching in New York next season, by the way.

Grumpy said...

Amen brother, that's all we ask. I don't follow baseball, so tell me why the manager wasn't in this guy's face.

Mr. Ace said...

Joe Madden would rather sniff his own turds than manage his players.

Honestly, I just want players on my teams to show up and play hard. If they aren't good people I don't really care as long as they win...unless they are rapists.

But I also understand that, ultimately, they are working for a pay check just like everybody else. I don't know what these guys have going on in their personal life, but I'm sure they have shitty days just like the rest of us and it effects their work just like it does ours.

GMoney said...

Joe Maddon is an old dyke that thinks he's smarter than everyone else. He sucks.

Ace, you ever think that Longoria looks like former Wildcat, Pat R.? I think it's a really good call.

Drew said...

I find it hard to talk shit about him, just due to the fact that his nickname stands for "Bossman Junior". That's pretty much the coolest nickname after a father ever.

Tony B. said...

I think it's funny that you didn't give a middle finger to Carlos Zambrano. It's just so obvious that he's a piece of shit, that there's no point writing a post about the douche bag. The Cubs need to clean house in a major way.

GMoney said...

I thought about it, Tony, but he does not deserve my words.

A guy named Bossman Junior should be hitting better than .226/7/29!

Anonymous said...

Jesus, get this site fixed. the new lay out sucks!!! what the fuck is wrong with you guys. First your drop Ace on us more than once a week, which is like a shovel up the anus sideways as it is, then this? WTF G$? Fuck, I'm angry right now

GMoney said...

Ace writes once a week unless I have major plans which I rarely have. The new layout is better because I say it is and you are wrong. Deal with it.

GMoney said...

And I'll be damned if I take advice from some anonymous commenting asshole with poor grammar. I would not be opposed to sticking a shovel up your ass though.

Mr. Ace said...

Hey Anon, fuck your face.

Drew said...

First Ace admits to grinding on dudes last week because it was funny. Now he's talking about fucking dude's faces. Dude really needs to find himself a boyfriend.

MuDawgfan said...

Scoop Jackson thinks this posting is terribly racist and you shouldn't ask black athletes to hustle like white athletes since they come from a different culture.