Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Legalize It: Roids Raging in the NFL

(What are you gonna do when Trojan Mania runs wild on you?)
I know this came as an earth shattering shock when it happened, but Brian Cushing used steroids...or he has nut cancer. Or if there is any justice in this world, both. Now we all know that the AP decided to do a re-vote on the Defensive ROY and somehow Cushing's name was left on the ballot and somehow people still actually voted for Cushing. Whatever. Half the guys that vote probably couldn't tell you what position Cushing played. But it is still bothersome that even after the public was told that Cushing tested positive in September, and therefore had the aid of PED's leading up to the beginning of the season and throughout, he was still able to keep his award and all of the cash he netted through incentives in his contract. There is only one explanation.

The NFL knows damn well that EVERYBODY is doing it, not just the cool kids anymore. Whether it's steroids, HGH, or PCP(my personal favorite), the use of Performance Enhancing Drugs runs rampant in the NFL. I, for one, don't care if NFL players are using or not. The average salary of an NFL player is around $800,000. If you were competing for a job that carried that same salary and you knew the majority of your competitors were performing illegal acts to heighten their chances, wouldn't you do the same? Maybe you would or maybe you wouldn't, but you can't fault someone who would.

And the thing is, most PED's aren't even bad. Seriously, google the benefits of anabolic steroids and see what you come up with. You will find several things; increased numbers of red blood cells, improved calcium deposition in the bones, muscle enlargement, etc. Look up HGH and you will find even more benefits. Again, we are talking about PED use, not abuse. Hell, every single one of us reading this blog would be doing themselves a favor by jumping on the PED train...but I prefer beer and soft batch cookies.

Is it even fair to ask NFL players to go out there without using any type of performance enhancer? I can't even begin to imagine the wear and tear that an NFL player takes any given game, season, or career--my hands cramp up after just one half of Madden. Wouldn't it actually be making the players safer, or at least more durable? Isn't that why most players take them in the first place, to recover faster from injuries? The NFL has made it pretty clear that they couldn't give two shits about the players quality of life after football so spare me the protecting the players bullshit. If that were the case then they wouldn't be jamming players with cortisone just so they can make it on the field.

That is why I want the NFL to legalize steroids, HGH, and any other PED. However, I'm not saying just drop all regulations and turn the sport into a bunch of mutants beating the fuck out of each other--although I'm not totally against that idea either. But find a range that certain doctors and trainers believe to be within a healthy ratio and allow the players to take the PEDs up to that mark. Also, ban all masking agents. If you're trying to hide something, fuck off, you're gone. If you test over the limit then all of the information is released to the public so you can't pull a Cushing and make up some lame ass excuses or issue outright denials despite being juiced up from the time he went to USC.

I only have one more thing to say; Legalize it. Who's coming with me, and whose got the chron and Bob Marley?

On a completely unrelated note: I know this person. I will take my Ghetto Pass, thank you. Click the link, give him some hits.


GMoney said...

I don't get the outrage surrounding the re-vote. The NFL knew that he failed, allowed him to appeal, and gave him the OK to keep playing anyway. It couldn't have been that bad.

How about just telling the players what they can take. Give them a list. Stacker 2, Creatine, and 5 hour energy drinks are OK; EVERYTHING ELSE IS BANNED. Then there is no excuse for failing. Don't ban substances. Football players are morons, they don't read labels.

Soft Batch cookies are the best things ever created.

GMoney said...

Oh yeah, A-Bomb and THAMES!!! You can't discuss PED's without these two but it doesn't matter when they completely shit on Papelboner.

Grumpy said...

Your argument makes a lot of sense. NFL players have been doing PED's for decades; the players, league and fans all know it. Testing and enforcement is a sham.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Mr. Ace said...

It's not Cushing's fault he was allowed to keep playing without anybody knowing he failed a test. I just thought since they decided to re-vote because he tested positive there was no reason to keep him on the ballot.

Grump, of course I make a lot of sense.

Dut, PED's are illegal...I have no comment. Instead I will just delete your comment. No more fucking baseball in the comments.

GMoney said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Mr. Ace said...


GMoney said...

As soon as I can figure out how to get the comments back up, they will be. But I probably won't figure it out, get frustrated, and then just quit.

Mr. Ace fucked that Shook kid.

Anonymous said...

That Cushing picture is so fake..