This hasn't been touched on around these parts and, lets face it, nothing is going to beat that porn post so why try? As you all know, the NCAA has put forth formal allegations that Michigan has committed up to five major violations since the beginning of Rich Rodriguez' tenure. More importantly, since the beginning of DickRod's tenure Michigan has only won 3 Big Ten games, 8 regular season games, and not made a bowl game. Michigan has a giant case of Super AIDS with a sprinkling of herpes and the only cure is W's(or whatever Drew's OB-GYN gives him).
I've stood in staunch support of DickRod since he arrived in Ann Arbor and I still stand in his corner, but I am now standing far enough away to avoid the splatter when the shit hits the fan. If it were just the violations, this wouldn't even be a story. Literally, the Detroit Free Press would have never done the hit job they did if DickRod would have came in and won right away. No losing seasons. No hit job. No NCAA interest. No Violations. It's that simple. But Michigan is an embarrassing abortion(is there any other kind?) right now and these violations are serious...sort of.
The main allegations, at least as far as Michigan is concerned, is that Michigan practiced more than the allotted hours in a given week. THE AUDACITY! Can you believe that a major college football program actually makes their players practice more than 20 hours during the week? That is fucking nuts! This must be the first time it has ever happened. Listen, you can say whatever you want about Michigan sucking balls over the past several years, but I don't want to hear shit about these violations. Do you really think we got a competitive advantage from "over-practicing?" Is it really possible to gain a competitive advantage when you are doing the exact same damn thing that everybody else is? Seriously, every fucking program practices more than the NCAA allows...even Miami of Ohio.
The sanctions that come down from this won't be anything more than a loss of some practice hours and losing a coach for a year or two, and probably a few more years of probation since it took a fucking decade for the NCAA to rule on the Ed Martin shenanigans. Really nothing that will affect the program, just something that looks bad. Honestly, I'm kind of pissed with what the NCAA came up with. Although the Free Press through out some asinine numbers, the NCAA only found that Michigan went over the number of allowed practice hours by as little as 20 minutes in some cases. TWENTY FUCKING MINUTES! The thing is, I'm not even pissed at the NCAA for displaying such bitchassness by putting forth these violations, I'm pissed we weren't over by 20 hours. We are the laughing stock of the entire college football landscape and all DickRod is doing is accidentally having his players stretch an extra 20 minutes? Get the fuck out of here. I want bear crawls across burning coals. I want people puking up intestines. I don't want adeqautely stretched hamstrings, that's for fags.
You know what Michigan's problem is? DickRod is a giant, bleeding fucking gash. Remember when he got up in front of everybody and started sobbing like a school girl bitch because he was accused of working his players too hard in the off-season? I was hoping it was all an act and DickRod was actually beating the shit out of his kids. Turns out he is just a pussy and cries like a bitch when falsely accused.
I wasn't a huge fan of the Lloyd Carr era, particularly the end of it, but I am a huge fan of Lloyd Carr for one reason: he didn't give two shits about the media. Nobody will forget back in 2003 when he kneeled on the ball to go into half with the lead against the Fuckeyes and Todd Harris had the stones to ask Lloyd Carr why he took a knee with two timeouts left. Lloyd's response, "Why would you ask a dumb question like that?" Harris tried to follow up with the same question and Lloyd just shook his head and headed down the tunnel. That is classic Lloyd Carr, something Michigan is missing right now. Can you imagine if the sniveling hacks at the Freep tried to pull that shit on Lloyd? His response would have been a hell storm of awesome, not some grown man crying about practice.
With these allegations, it is 2010 or bust for ol' DickRod. Without the allegations, I think DickRod could get have gotten away with a .500 record and a bowl birth and still been able to stick around one more year. With the allegations and the penalties coming from them, I think DickRod needs 8 wins to stick around. And honestly, I really hope he does stick around. I like the athletes we are bringing in and think he can build an offense that can dominate the Big Ten. I just don't know if he will get that chance.
Also, fuck Morgan Trent. I was actually starting to feel bad about a piece a wrote back in 2008 that stated I wished Trent would have been swallowed. I have never been more proud of that piece now. You will want to check it out, here it is.