Thursday, September 17, 2009
I think you all know by now that I love the Washington Redskins. I would do unspeakable things just to see them win their fourth Super Bowl title of my lifetime. It's been a long 18 years since but I realize that some of you have been waiting longer so I'm not going to act like a victim here. I've got more pressing matters to discuss besides the almost two decades of futility in the nation's capital.
It's not always easy to be a Redskins fan. When Jack Kent Cooke died and his family sold the team to some hot shot dipshit, that was a tough day. When Dan Snyder hired Steve Spurrier, that was a tough day. When they lost to a terrible Rams team at home last year, that was a tough-ass day. But when it comes down to it, I can't turn my back on them. It's probably like how Andy Reid feels about his sons. Sure, they are fucking horrible people and probably should have their organs harvested now, but they are still his kids, dammit.
Well, a group of Native Americans are asking the Supreme Court to deem the name "Redskins" offensive. First of all, if these Indians want to be offended, they should watch 2 series of Jim Zorn's offense. Maybe they are offended because the Redskins have been so mediocre recently? That makes sense. Now I don't want to get into a whole thing about whether the name Redskins is offensive. It probably is but you know what, fuck you. You've got casinos and I have ulcers from watching bad football. Seems to me like you got the better deal there.
Here is my point. Although I don't think anything will happen from this (since these groups have been trying to do this since the 90's), if the government steps in and tries to tell my Washington Redskins that they need to become the Washington Bulldogs or something else unoriginal, I quit. I'm done. I grew up loving the Washington REDSKINS. I don't care if it is just a uniform/name change, that team is different. If it does come down to this, I will officially announce my free agency. I will be on the market for a new NFL team. I've already lost the name Redskins to one of my teams, I'll be damned if it happens to me again.
William Wallace said it best during the penultimate scene in Braveheart: And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade all of that from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take away our wins, but they'll never take the name "Redskins"!!!
No one as awesome as Chief Zee (pictured) could possibly be racist. Now the mustachioed Lions fan with the overalls on the other hand...