Monday, September 14, 2009

The Cock-Gagging In Columbus


Wellity, wellity, wellity...the icon, Pete Carroll, came into central Ohio riding his white horse from the heavens representing all that is good and right, and left central Ohio still a shining beacon of excellence. Ugh, I don't like complimenting people but I give PC his props. That man knows what he's doing and he's the fucking best at it. But seriously, that game was horse shit. Fucking boring ass football. The quarterback play on both sides was garbage for the most part. I give Buckeye fans a bit of credit as that stadium seemed to be rocking. But enough praise, I've got a job to do here. We need to highlight a few things and have a grown-up discussion. As much as I would like to, I'm not going to sit here, point my finger at Buckeye Nation, and say that you all deserve to be humiliated like the dickless queers that you are. I'm not going to do that. But we do need to review three points that stood out to me.

1. The Pryor man-crushes need to stop. Seriously. Knock it off now. It doesn't help him or anyone else when everyone makes him out to be the best when he has proven absolutely nothing. Make him earn the accolades. He has not accomplished ANYTHING yet. DO SOMETHING, YOU SHITHEAD!!! Yeah, he's fast as fuck and is the best athlete on the field almost every week. How about he starts playing like it? Other than last year's road game against an inferior Wisky team, when has he put a team on his back and willed them to a win? I can't remember any. Pryor still has not had that "signature" game that you fans can point to and say "that was the game when TP realized his potential". I'm still waiting for the prima donna to impress me. But that being said, it really isn't 100% his fault.

2. Jim Tressel needs to stop being a pussy. I am not surprised that Tressel gives money to the Republican Party because he coaches like the tightest conservative to ever coach. Like I said, he has a freak at QB yet refuses to unleash him. He is making his QB run HIS system as opposed to adapting his system to the talent that he has on the field. And that is flat out wrong. That is his biggest flaw yet his ego is too massive to change that. Joe Bauserman can hand the ball off to mediocre running backs. Why is Pryor not running the ball!!! Don't even get me started on the 4th down in the 2nd quarter. For the record, Petey Carroll goes for it on 4th from the one and scores. Tress has 4th and 1 from the 4 and kicks a FG. There is your fucking difference. Pussy. Make a fucking statement. So what if you fail...they get the ball inside the 5. Internally, I had a feeling that that would come back to haunt the Buckeyes. It did. And to you fans calling for his head, shame on you. Tressel has his shortcomings but who in the hell would you get to replace him should you get your way? Urban ain't coming and neither is Stoops or Carroll or Mike Haywood. This is going to confuse you, anOSU fans, but stop being retarded. Unless you are tired of 10-11 win seasons. And if that is the case, eat shit. Eat my shit, you greedy fuckers. My fucking team hasn't scored this year. It could be worse...a LOT worse.

3. Matt "Ramblin' Red" Barkley deserves all of the praise that he is getting. He really does. Ohio State fans on the radio today were trying to diminish what he did which is just flat out embarrassing. Sure, his numbers weren't the greatest and he made mistakes, but the kid just turned 19! It was his first college road game! The Shoe was a fucking asylum! He led his team 90+ yards on the last drive of the game to win a massive ass road game and kept the Trojans in the hunt for a national title game. That was extremely impressive. When the shit was on the line, he answered the fucking bell. And that is something that Pryor is still unable to do.

Please do not talk about Michigan today. I'm trying to get a separate post up on their redemption tomorrow. Buckeye/football fans, feel free to talk about the Cock-Gagging In Columbus in the comments. And do not be surprised if Toledo puts a scare into the Buckeyes on Saturday.

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

All of you overrated haters, start singing my praise right now!!!

-GSaul

Anonymous said...

G$,

I agree 100% with everything you said.

GSaul,

Shove it up your ass! I will never praise you for anything having to do with college football.

-Lil' Strut

Nate B. said...

I would think this game shows OSU to be a legitimate top 10 team, if anything. Considering USC's #3 ranking, the fact OSU was leading them for 99% of the game, I think it's fair to say we're a better team than what most outside of Columbus were thinking going into Saturday.

Anonymous said...

legitimate top 10 i think might be pushing it right now. We still dont know if USC is a real top 10 team yet. We will find out in a couple of weeks if they are a top 10 team. The rockets are going to scare OSU for sure. That offense is high powered.

Naptown Wolverine

Anonymous said...

GSaul, lick my nuts. Losing to USC at home really makes you overrated, you're right. Seriously, do you even watch college football?

I am not ready to talk about this game yet or Ohio State football. Maybe in about a month.

-Damman

GMoney said...

Nate, are you implying that this was a moral victory? Because if you are, or any of you are, die. Die now please.

LS, G$ only speaks the truth, bitch.

Nate B. said...

All I heard last week from everybody that had something to say about the game was how USC was going to destroy OSU at home.

Now, instead of people giving credit to OSU for nearly winning the game, people will (and already are) questioning USC's talent level this year. I don't give two shits about moral victories, but think it's a crock of shit that nobody will credit OSU for nearly beating almighty USC.

GMoney said...

Congratulations on your almost win, anOSU. The piss stream trickling down your coach's leg in the 4th quarter added another foot of depth to the Olentangy River. You should be commended for losing a home game when you have a top 5 recruiting class every single season. But at least it was close.

Well done, Buckeyes, well done.

Anonymous said...

Nate, that would be like me getting credit for almost getting laid but i did not. See almost doesnt count, a loss is a loss. Poeple will start to respect them when they start winning the big games.

Naptown Wolverine

Anonymous said...

NW, you would know all about the not getting laid thing. Zing!

No moral victories are allowed. This is Ohio St. and we, as fans, should expect them to win every game, not come close.

-Damman

Mr. Ace said...

Wow, that was the greatest game ever. If the fuckeyes weren't going to lose by 30, this was the best way I could have envisioned them losing. Heart breaking defeat just when they finally thought they were going to win a big game. I believe they still managed to salvage some respect for the Big Ten even with the loss, but I honestly don't give a shit.

Hear me out Fuckeyes, TERRELL PRYOR SHOULD NOT BE A QUARTERBACK! Seriously, he is fucking terrible. I told you this last year and during the offseason but for some reason you clowns didn't believe me. Move his ass to WR and you might have yourselves the next Calvin Johnson. But for fuck's sake, don't let him throw the ball.

Anonymous said...

*Mr. Ace, you're a fucking retard. Vince Young didn't start looking like a real QB until his red-shirt sophomore year. TP is fine and will be a stud.

*I'm glad you fucks that put money on USC lost.

*The atmosphere was incredible....you just can't get a better atmosphere at a game then that one on Saturday night. It was a huge recruiting weekend and it's already paying dividends.

*G$...I agree with you on the difference between coaches is that Petey goes for touchdowns, while we play for field goals and field possession. Unfortunately, they didn't actually score on their 4th and Goal though... http://i168.photobucket.com/albums/u199/WoodyDawg/UNTITLED.jpg

--Drew

GMoney said...

If you hate Ace now, just wait until tomorrow. It's going to be a bloodbath of hate.

Anonymous said...

I know 2 teams that have better QB's as true freshman and OSU will get beat by goth of them.

Naptown Wolverine

Anonymous said...

NW, I know one of those teams you are talking about is Michigan, but I'm not sure who this other team is with a true freshman QB.

-Damman

Anonymous said...

Let's be real, there is one thing that you can't say G$. The Freshman didn't do anything great. Yeah, he didn't cost the game, but if you are singing his praise, you should be sucking Trent Dilfer's dick for his super bowl win. Barkley's arm was shot that last drive. Fuck, I can hand it off or toss it to J McKnight against that fucking D the Buckeyes put out there. Yes, I have a torn up shoulder, so I know what the pain is like, and yes, I'm a 285 lb former lineman, like your fat ass. OSU was simply out coached, which everyone has been saying. Tressel doesn't need fired, he needs some nuts and a new OC.

Frank N. Beans

Anonymous said...

On Pryor, the comparisons to Vince Young look to be somewhat legit. Young got to redshirt but looked really raw his first two years and then exploded. Right now Pryor compares to the very raw unorthadox throwing Vince Young. I hope next year or the year after he compares to the USC shredding Vince Young.

On Tressel, he needs to be criticized for his play calling and questionable decisions. But, for those asking for his head or wholesale changes, you are not going to go out and do any better. Hell Bob Stoops cant win a big game either.

Now, a new offensive coordinator or letting somone else make the play calls is most certainly up for debate.

Hoffman