Monday, August 03, 2009

Let's Talk Some MLB Trade Deadline Deals

So the MLB trade deadline has came and went, was it good for you? Of course it wasn't, because all of the trades fucking sucked. Guess which one sucked the worst. My Chicago White Sox traded away some solid young pitching prospects for a fucking gimp who may not even pitch this year. Jake Peavy? Fuck you Kenny Williams. Isn't it obvious to everybody with a pulse that the White Sox needed to go out and get a big bat to make a strong run at winning the division? Does Kenny Williams not have a pulse? Sure, we got a deal because of Peavy's injury status...but he has a fucking injury status! For this season, Jake Peavy is about as useless as Corey Lidle.

The White Sox weren't the only ones making big moves, G Money's Yankees made their own big splash by acquiring...Jerry Hairston Jr.? Who the fuck trades for Jerry Hairston Jr.? Why even waste your time? If you are really looking to get Jerry Hairston Jr. the only thing you can possibly be thinking is "let's go out and get the most average guy in the majors." Yes, there team stacked like a Kardashian so a big move wasn't needed, but why didn't they get some pitching? They apparently wanted Jarrod Washburn, which would have been a HUGE pickup for them, but were out dealed by the lowly Detroit Tigers. There rotation is solid now, but everybody knows that C.C. can't be in it for the long haul without some rest. And do you really want to depend on Andy Pettitte to anchor your rotation?

Aren't the Cleveland Indians hilarious? Does Cleveland even deserve to have professional sports? Can you really consider the Indians a professional team at this point? No team dumps their best players for a sack of dicks like the Cleveland Indians. Nothin' like giving up Cy Young pitchers in consecutive years for a turd sandwich. Okay, maybe they got some good pitching prospects, but they will just be traded away in five years anyways. The Cleveland Indians are only relevant because they likely gave the Red Sox(Victor Jesus Martinez) and Phillies(Cliff Lee) exactly what they needed to be the favorites to make it to the World Series. Well played, Cleveland. Enjoy that AL Central basement.

The Pittsburgh Pirates. Where to even begin? Yes, they were terrible to begin with so it's not like they are just giving up on making a playoff run, but come on. Did they really have to trade away their entire team? Seriously, since June they have traded away 10 players and added 18. I guess this is just their way of completely restarting a franchise...until next year.

And the biggest losers in all of this, the Toronto Blue Jays. You can't make it known that Roy Halladay is available and then turn down every single offer. This was their big chance to cash in and they missed the boat. Halladay is great, but he really doesn't mean dick for the Jays. They aren't winning anything with him. The only way he is truly valuable to them is through a trade. If they try to deal him again after the season is over then they probably won't get half the offers they received in July. J.P. Ricciardi totally fucked up this deal...but who cares, it's Canada.

So who were the big winner and losers...or should we just talk about G Money's wedding in the comments?


GMoney said...

I'm sitting in the airport now still thinking about how annoying our freaking dj was.

The M's asked for Hughes or Joba for Washburn and instead accepted Luke French and a half-hearted HJ instead. I don't get it.

By the way, some dickhead security guard here just saw my hat and yelled "GO SAWX!" What a prick.

Mr. Ace said...

Good shit. I wanted to fucking kill your DJ. The dude was running around in a FUCKING T SHIRT!

And Dustin was making inappropriate comments about your mother.

Dustin said...

I was hiding at the bar 90% of the time so I didn't have to hear the DJ. Or maybe I was hiding there to fuel my alcoholism? Who takes first place in drunk guy award? There are a LOT of candidates!

Tony B. said...

What the fuck is up with Red Sox fans? I was in Vegas once walking around in a Wrigley Field shirt and some dude walked up to me and said, "Fenway Paaaack is better!" Are they even insecure about their stadium? And why can't they pronounce the "r" in "park?"

rstiles said...

Fuck Boston...the Yankees are going to rip them a new asshole this week!!!!

Anonymous said...

yeah becuase they have been beating up on them all season long huh rstiles??? idiot...


stonybrown said...

Who was your DJ? Rusty Hoops? Adam Gubernath?