Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Introducing Cortez Benitez

I get home from work on Monday night and I'm feeling a bit...shall we say...amorous. I need to get my rocks off as the kids say. So I do what every other saavy blogger would do and I turn on the Little League World Series! Just kidding, FBI.

Anyway, some team from Georgia is trying to hold off another team from Washington maybe. But that is beside the point. What struck me as odd was that the closer from Warner Robins, GA was a fucking hoss. A 12 year old kid shouldn't 5'11" and 226 pounds.

I mean, every year we go through the same rumors (thanks Danny Almonte) of kids not being the correct age for little league. Well, I'm pretty sure that Cortez Broughton is in his mid-30's. He looks EXACTLY like former shitty pitcher, Armando Benitez. He throws like him, too, meaning that he wings it about 100 mph and has no fucking clue where it's going. Judge for yourself, but I'm pretty sure that Cortez and Armando are father and son.

And I'm still waiting to release that tension...


Grumpy said...

That kid could play LB in the MAC.

Dustin said...

Did you forget that they all look the same?

GMoney said...


12 year old kids shouldn't weigh 226 pounds. Jesus Christ.