Friday, July 24, 2009


Well...this is it for me for the next two weeks. I close and move in to the new house today. Remember all of my bitching about the whole home-buying process? With our current awesome realtor and loan hook-up, we were able to close in LESS than FIVE WEEKS. Amazing, eh? If you have any plans of buying a house in central Ohio, I could not recommend our realtor more.

So instead of blogging this weekend, I will be throwing out my back dealing with heavy shit. Not cool. At least the cable guy is coming out tomorrow morning which is giving me a boner. Then, of course, I get married next Saturday. Awwww...I wish that I could marry each and every one of my readers. But you are all ugly. After that, I will be heading out to SoCal for my honeymoon and will be back in front of the computer again, ready to work, on August 10th.

In the meantime, much to everyone's dismay, Mr. Ace will be trying to keep us afloat. He will fail miserably. I expect you all to remind him of this daily when he's trying to explain to the complexity of John Beilein's 1-3-1 defense. A few quick notes before I ride off into the sunset:

*That LeBron video was pretty pointless, huh? Not really sure why Nike got all butt-hurt over it. Hell, Courtney Lee posterized him worse than that TWICE in the ECF! And I beg the media not to get all crazy about LeBron admitting that he smoked some weed as a 17 year old. That isn't a story. Let it go.

*Mark Buehrle threw a perfect game against the team that I told you before the season wasn't going to be that good again. Is it just me or does anyone else not like Buehrle? There's just something about him that pisses me off. Could be the wispy, gay lumberjack beard. Yeah, it's probably that.

*Big Ben held a press conference. You are pathetic if you watched it. What were you expecting anyway? "Yeah, she didn't want it but I was always told that no means yes and yes really means yes". Of course, he's going to deny it. Ten bucks says this thing goes away by the time I make my return to this site.

*Does Bill Simmons even work for ESPN anymore? The guy works less than Kato Kaehlin.

Eh, that's it for me, I guess. I need to conserve my energy for the move. I will try my best to pop in everyday (definitely will next week) to call Mr. Ace a fag and remind you all how much you miss me. Behave yourselves and I'll see you in two weeks when I'm officially...a married man. Fuck. Me.


Tony B. said...

Where are you headed in SoCal?

GMoney said...

San Diego...lots of Mexicans. I expect you to make the 10-ish hour drive south to say hello, bitch!

Anonymous said...

I demand that you go down to Tijuana to see the Donkey Show and report back to us about how it is.



Grumpy said...

Ace won't have to do much to meet the standard you have set. Does the future Mrs. G$ know you are gay? Does she need a green card to stay in the country? What if you go and nobody notices? Congratulations anyway. You know the cable guy won't show, right?

Dustin said...

why are you not blogging next week? You don't get married for 8 days! I don't know If I can deal with 2 weeks of ace.

Anonymous said...

I would rather gargle razorblades than have 2 weeks of Mr. Ace.

-Lil' Strut

GMoney said...

I don't have to explain myself to you, Dut.

Jesus, Grump, you should have unleashed those quips on my blogiversary roast.

I plan on going down to TJ a few times for a show or six.

I'm with you, LS. I'm extremely nervous about the next few weeks.

Tony B. said...

Go to a restaurant called the Yard House in the Gas Lamp district (near Petco Park.) She$ will think it's a classy place, at least until you get tanked by buying beer by the yard.

Mr. Ace said...

I am going to fist fuck the money shot into the ground.

Lil Strut, the only thing you gargle is cum.

Dustin, I will delete every single comment of yours for the next two weeks.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Ace,

If its your cum I gargle, doesn't that make you gay, too?

I actually like Dut's comments from time to time and would be upset to see them go.

-Lil' Strut

GMoney said...

Ugh, moving fucking sucks balls.