Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Relax, G$


Dear G$,

Calm down. There is no need to get worked up over this. It is a marathon and not a sprint. You fucking know this! Forget about the fact that your new 161 million dollar man pitched worse than Joe Biden yesterday. Let it all roll off your back, Money-man. Everything will be OK.

CC is known as a slow starter. The thing that should worry you is that if he is known as a slow starter, why isn't he doing something to stop it. Like perhaps STARTING EARLIER...whatever that might entail. Just because he walked the entire city of Baltimore (including the corpse of Prop Joe) and struck out as many people as you did, Frankie says Relax! If anything, you should be concerned about Xavier Nady morphing into the dumbest human being on the planet.

It's just one game. Even if it does take a few weeks to get the big man going, the rest of the rotation is fantastic and has the capability of picking up the slack. This is why Brian Cashman spent all of that scratch in the offseason...so you don't have to watch Kei Igawa anymore (who was actually awesome in the Spring).

Don't you remember what you did for Baseball Jesus two years ago? Eventhough everyone was down on A-Rod, you made the decision to stay positive on him, no matter what, for the entire 2007 season. The fucker went on to have one of the most amazing seasons in recent history. And it was all due to you, G$, and your optomistic outlook on life.

So take a deep breath. The Yankees aren't the Brewers. We don't need CC to dominate every time he takes the mound. It could be worse. You could be an Indians fan and watch your ace get lit up yesterday while you realize that your 3-5 starters couldn't pitch in beer league softball.

It's a long season, fucker, so get your head out of your ass. This is the best team to play in the Bronx since 2000 so enjoy the motherfucker.

Sincerely,

G$ from 2007

4 comments:

Tony B. said...

The Yankees will probably be fine, but the pressure is only going to rise for CC if he doesn't do well in his next start. It'll be interesting to see how Burnett handles the dangerously explosive Orioles offense.

Dustin said...

I wouldn't be scared... If I were an Indians or tigers fan (I am).. I would be really scared.

Anonymous said...

CC is garbage under pressure.

-Damman

GMoney said...

Well, he did play for garbage teams. Maybe the stink of failure will finally get off of him.