Wednesday, February 25, 2009

That's More Like It, You Idiots

After a fairly calm season in DC in 2008, it appears that the Redskins are back to their old "winning" ways. I put winning in quotes because everyone in the world knows that throwing money around is not a winning formula. Well, everyone except for Dan Snyder and Vinny "The Fetus" Cerrato. I swear to God, these two are trying their fucking hardest to give me an aneurysm. Allow me to explain:

Citing a "very well-connected league source," Lance Zierlein of the Houston Chronicle reports that Albert Haynesworth will sign with the Redskins at the start of free agency unless the Titans swoop in late.

Zierlein, the son of Steelers OL coach Larry Zierlein, has a blog at and does a radio show. His source says Haynesworth will get a deal totaling roughly $100 million that pays $15-16 million annually. Zierlein doesn't usually report and it's hard to see how the Skins will fit him under the salary cap, but this is the kind of megadeal Haynesworth is seeking.

God dammit. God dammit. On the surface, yes, I can see why they want to do this. Haynesworth is arguably the best defensive player in the league and our d-line is fucking terrible. But come on, 100 million??? This isn't baseball. You can't pay a guy 15 million per season. Is Snyder trying to compete with the Steinbrenner Brothers for the title of America's Dumbest Rich Guy? Don't steal that idea either. I'm taking that show to pitch to the Fox executives.

Oh, and this just in because I'm sure that the two morons running my favorite team don't know this, Haynesworth has NEVER PLAYED A FULL SEASON! Never. Not one time in his career has he played all 16 games. And we want to give him nine figures. There is no way in Hell that Albert could come remotely even close to living up to this money. They make me soooo mad.

I fucking hate Snyder and Cerrato. They really don't have a damn clue when it comes to running a football team. If the Redskins were ever fortunate enough to win the Super Bowl with these two morons running the show (they won't but let me dream), I would hope that Roger Goodell would not even acknowledge them during the trophy ceremony and just hand the title to The Golden Arm Of Todd Collins.

If they do seal the deal with Haynesworth, maybe they have something up their sleeve. Maybe they will give me wood by cutting Randle El, Moss, Springs, Jon Jansen, and other guys that should have never been signed in the first place. Maybe? But I doubt it because that would be a smart move and this regime is still waiting for their first one of those.

Ugh, at least Haynesworth likes to stomp on the necks of Cowboys. And that is something that can sell me on this move...I guess. I hate Dan Snyder. Go blow Tom Cruise, you midget prick.


Anonymous said...

Yes, it seems that the teams you root for have cornered the market on awful ownership. Now if the Redskins could corner the steroid market in football like the Yankees have done in baseball, you would really have something to bitch about.


Dustin said...

I don't understand why you hate moss. The guy carried my fantasy team last year for the first 10 weeks!

And Damman- the browns and Indians ownership may be worse than the skankees and skins!

GMoney said...

I would love it if the Redskins would take steroids. By the way, is your office allowing this wonderful site to pass the firewall again???

Dut, Santana Moss is fucking terrible and you know it. But you are right about the owners. At least my owners want to win (eventhough they are retarded).

Anonymous said...

Yeah, it comes and goes. I can come here for two or three weeks and then it shuts me out again for two or three weeks. Really weird.

No arguement here when it comes to the terrible ownership of the Browns and Indians. But I would say that your owner better stick to Little Caesars, thanks to that great offseason the Tigers had a year ago.


Mr. Ace said...


Allan Stokke said...

"Is Snyder trying to compete with Steindouche?..."

Umm yes. Just look at the twerp, he even looks like George.