Friday, December 26, 2008

I'm Gonna Tell My Dad!

There's no denying that A Christmas Story is one of, if not the, best part of the holiday season for me. I love it. An amazingly well-crafted movie that still holds up today. Even with the casual racism, you still have got to love this masterpiece. So today, as I'm stuck at work for another 9 hours eventhough I'm already bored out of my gourd an hour in, I figured that I could at least acknowledge some of my favorite characters in A Christmas Story that aren't in the Parker family. While Randy is the best character ever, here are some of my other favorites:

Grover Dill - Scott Farkus's toadie! I don't like Farkus that much because he has braces. Even with a sick coon-skin cap, the braces are a deal-breaker for me. I'm fairly certain that Dill is 3 feet tall and is destined to become a cab driver.

The Tree Salesman - I don't know why, but this guy kills me. He's trying to sell trees to the dad, but when they say no to one, he chucks it out of the way. When he and Darren McGavin are bargaining over price...brilliant. And he kind of looks like Curtis Armstrong AKA Booger from Revenge of the Nerds.

Schwartz - Flick is pretty gay but Schwartz is the best. He's a smartass with a really weird hat...gotta love it. Shame on Ralphie for narc-ing on Schwartz!

The Dumb Kid Ahead of Ralphie and Randy In The Santa Line - I don't know what's going on with this imbecile. He is wearing goggles and what appears to be a leather football helmet. The way that Ralphie treats this idiot is exactly the way that I shit.

The Chinese Singers - Ah, yes, the one scene in the movie that would not be allowed today. These guys take stereotypes to a new level with their extreme inability to use "L's" in their speech. Priceless. 'Tis the season to be jo-rry.

Well, there you go. That took 10 minutes. Only 500 more today.


Anonymous said...

I am embarassed to admit that I have never seen this movie, so this post was pretty pointless for me. I spent yesterday watching the Rocky marathon on Versus. I even watched Rocky V. Now that is a solid Christmas.


GMoney said...

Seriously? My dad was the same way until last year and he loved it. I think he watched it three times this year. The movie was made in Cleveland for shit's sake!

Dustin said...

I'm embarassed for reading this blogspot today. This movie is for girls and gays. What are you doing working the day after Christmas...on a Friday for???

Anonymous said...

We don't all have nice, cushy jobs like yourself, Dut.


GMoney said...

Dut, it's the price that I pay for taking a week and a half off at Thanksgiving. I have no regrets.

Just because your Christmas movie watching is relegated to your uncle's home movies, don't you dare talk shit about mine.

J Beanie said...

This is a great movie. I've actually been to Tremont and seen the house they filmed at. Pretty cool.

And how about Ralphie now riding the coat tail of his best friend Vince Vaughn? He plays a small role as an airline ticket guy in Four Christmases and was just hanging out backstage with everyone in Vaughn's comedy tour movie. He's like Turtle and Drama in one. What a great life.