Thursday, November 20, 2008

Seriously, I'm a Manager

I've been thinking that this blog has not been as politically incorrect as I like it to be recently. Well, that shit is changing today. How do you all feel about stereotyping Asian-Americans? Good, I hope. If not, I don't really care anyway. If I did, I wouldn't be a blogger and you wouldn't love me.

Meet Don Wakamatsu (pictured). He is the new manager of the Seattle Mariners. He is the first Asian-American manager in Major League Baseball. He was also the bench coach of the 75 win Oakland A's last year (meaning that he was MORE than qualified). He drove to his interview with his right blinker on the entire time.

The Mariners must believe that with a 100+ million dollar payroll, an Asian man is more than qualified to crunch the numbers and make it work. He probably doesn't even need a calculator. And since a 9 figure baseball team tends to be emasculated after losing 100 games, the fact that Don has a tiny penis will only raise the spirits of these losers. Hello Kitty backpacks for everybody!!!

In Wakamatsu's first press conference in Seattle, he was asked a variety of questions regarding his managerial style and what he thought of each team in the AL West.
On Oakland:
I'll give you a TKO from Tokyo.
On Anaheim:
Sushi, kamikaze, fujiyama, nipponichi...
And on Texas:
Join the Nintendo Fanclub today!

It should be a great season in Seattle. I really, REALLY want to play Mike Tyson's Punch Out right now.


J Beanie said...

He is going to be a great manager. He'll motivate his players by saying things such as "You Americans have such laaaaaarrrrgggggggggeeee penises."

GMoney said...

Beanie, I think we can both agree on one thing...the "casual racism" label needs to be used more often.

J Beanie said...