Wednesday, November 19, 2008
We all know that the American League is superior to the senior circuit in pretty much every facet of baseball. Yes, the Phillies won the World Series but, let's be honest, had they played in the AL East, they don't make the playoffs. But something has dawned on me this week and that is that the AL is quietly turning into a shitty product. And all that you have to do is look at the award winners.
The Rays represented them in the World Series. It was a great story and I'm not going to argue that. But come on, they were a total fucking fluke and we all know it. They'll be back to their old selves next year when everyone comes down off of cloud nine (see: 2008 Cleveland Indians).
Joe Maddon was the manager of the year. Again, that was very deserved (how Plain Dealer writer, Terry Pluto, voted for Ron Gardenhire, I have no idea). But the guy looks like an old lesbian. We get it already, you're all philosophical and want to look like Drew Carey.
Cliff Lee won the Cy Young. He had a great season but he isn't an ace and we all know it. For God's sake, he was pitching in AAA in 2007. I'm not going to say that this was definitely a fluke season, but I'm 95% sure that he's a .500 pitcher next season. Let's see how he does when there is actually some pressure on him because this year he was pitching in front of 15,000 people every night. And remember, nobody named Cliff has ever been good at anything and that includes Uncle Cliffy Robinson.
Dustin Pedroia won the MVP. How sad is it that this little midget fuck won the AL most valuable player award. It disgusts me. But when you look at who else was up there, there was NO ONE that deserved it. Youkilis should receive two bullets in his medullah oblongata. Justin Morneau shouldn't even own one MVP trophy let alone two. Joe Mauer? Eh. I really think that they should have just suspended the award this season. Carry it over, like in a Skins game. Whoever wins the MVP in the AL next year, gets two awards. How great of an idea is that. It's better than giving it to a 4 foot tall turd.
I really should be the commissioner of baseball. I don't even look half as dead as Bud Selig. Thank God that the Yankees are going to do everything in their power (and their wallets) to make this league great again.