Monday, September 15, 2008

The Worst of Week Two Vol.II


OK, I've got a bit of a problem here. I'm writing this up as I usually do, at 10 pm on Sunday night. The difference this week is that I had to drive to the office to do it. You see, there are currently over 300,000 people in the Columbus area without power and, lo and behold, I am one of them. In fact, the only football that I've seen today is the first 3 quarters of the Titans/Bengals suckfest. I am pissed off. I've been blacked out (and not the good kind either) since 3 pm today and, get this, AEP, those fine douche bags that control the shit, say that we could be without power for possibly the next SEVEN DAYS. You've got to be fucking kidding me. So I'm not sure how the blog is going to go this week but I hope that we aren't affected too badly. Because this sucks. You know what else sucks? Having all of your bedding still in the dryer and possibly having to sleep just on the mattress the next few nights. Awesome. Fuck you, AEP. Fuck you, Gustav, Ike, and whatever the hell other hurricane that this shit is a result of. This is the worst thing ever. But anyway, as Queen once sang, the show must go on. Let's address a few topics from the football world...

Ohio State sure does enjoy embarrassing themselves - Now THAT was fun. O-VER-RA-TED!!! A complete destruction of the local joke. After the raping, I had Damman say to me at the bar, "Can you just explain to me how we always have a top 5 recruiting class yet never can compete in the big games?" Or something like that, he and I were both pretty blitzed. And it's a damn good question. The answer is simple...Jim Tressel is a very good coach, but he isn't great and it's time that you all admit that. If you look at Saturday's game and the LSU and Florida games, the underlying issue is that his team wasn't ready to play on any of those nights. You can keep winning the Big Ten all you want to, wake me when you can beat a good team. Nice job, Lame Lauranitis for coming back to win it all only to see your draft stock plummet out of the first round with that one shitty performance. Same with the gaping hole of Alex Boone and Marcus Freeman. Good job, guys, way to waste a year of your lives.

But as I told Damman, so what, you got beat by a better team. You can still win the conference. You can still run the table. You can still go back to southern Cali and potentially get a rematch in the Rose Bowl where they will kill you again. A national championship run is over but that doesn't mean that the season has to be considered a failure. Well, it will be over if The Todd Boeckman Statue of Doom remains the starter. The moral of the story is, it was great being the only fucker in a room of 20-25 people with USC colors on. I am fucking awesome.

Michigan Fans are losers - Losing to Notre Dame is bad enough (eventhough the injury to Chaz Weis was hilarious. I so wanted him to get carted into the locker room on a forklift), but after the game I know for a fact that two PROUD Big Blue fans made quick turnarounds. They both just so happen to comment here every once in a while. Glick and Jon both celebrated a loss to Jimmy Claussen by saying that they would be rooting for Ohio State that night "in support of the conference". How about you support the rivalry like a grown man? You two are a disgrace.

NFL Notes - As I said earlier, no fucking power. Here's what I can gather from following the scores on Buke's cell phone:
*Don't sleep on the Redskins yet, a nice come from behind win today against who many think will win the South. Congrats on the first win, Jim Zorn Boner.
*I'm very happy that I made that bet with Glick on who will have more wins this year, the Skins or the Falcons; it's going to be a long year for young Ryan.
*The Bengals, Lions, and Rams are the three worst teams in the league.
*The Seahawks are terrible.
*Suck on that, Brett Favre. The Patriots are still better than you and I love it.
*This Bills team is the best team in the history of the NFL.
*The Chargers are racking up the bizarre losses, aren't they? Jay Cutler is looking pretty damn good thus far.
*Welcome to the NFL, Darren McFadden.

That does it for tonight. I need to get home and sleep in my pitch black bedroom and pray that my cellphone alarm actually wakes me up. This fucking sucks. I'm the victim here, not all of those people in Texas. Cowboys fans deserve bad things, not innocent bloggers.

32 comments:

MUDAWGFAN said...

Nobody makes better tackles 8 yards downfield than James Laurenitis.

Is he the next Junior Seau? Woefully overated and ready to jump on the pile in the pros after the play is blown dead?

J Beanie said...

What the hell did you do all day Sunday if you didn't have power? I think I would have gone crazy.

I said it before and I'll say it again, you aren't a true Michigan fan if you root for Ohio State, any time, in any game. Especially after you just got rolled against a team that has a quarter with down syndrome. You root for USC and laugh at OSU fans when they can't perform under the pressure like a guy with whisky dick.

I was really looking forward to your worst performers of the NFL. Can Romeo have the top 542 slots?

Anonymous said...

O-H I-Overrated! 35-3

Lil Strut, go back, read my blog again and learn that your bias was why you hated my blog. Who is the only one out of the five that has any correct predictions even left after the first two weeks of the season? This Guy! USC #1. Have fun losing to Troy this Saturday too. Beanie Wells for Heisman!

GSaul

GMoney said...

I still don't have power. Beanie, I did listen to Jim Donovan and Doug "Serial Killer" Deacon on the radio last night. It was terrible.

Why the fuck did Romeo kick a FG down 7 with 3 minutes to go from the 20 yard line??? That guy is no Jim Zorn.

Upstate Underdog said...

The worst was the weekend was ed Hochuli. Nice call dick bag.

And yes, this Bills team is the best team in the history of the NFL.

Upstate Underdog said...

*of the weekend

rstiles said...

A true Michigan Man NEVER...I repeat NEVER roots for Ohio State...

Anonymous said...

GSaul,

I will not retract my statement. If you recall my comments I attacked you for having them at most overrated when your rankings actually had them at #4, which seemed contradictory in the eyes of many. Not once did I say you couldn't have them at most overrated, only that your argument was extremely flawed, because of where you put them in your own rankings. You were the one who was emotionally biased, not me with my logical reasoning.

Lil' Strut

J Beanie said...

So since you don't have power at home, are you just going to stay at work late into the night? It's got to be better than going home and doing what? Talking? That shit sucks.

Of course you could always play monopoly.

GMoney said...

Candle light Monopoly is worse than watching Browns football.

Li'l Strut, be a man and accept the fact that your team is overrated. I am tempted to delete your comment but I know deep down that you will end this charade.

Where are all the Buckeye fans at anyway? Did they get their asses kicked or something???

Anonymous said...

'Lil Strut/GSaul,

Can we please drop this argument? It has been going on for far too long. Ohio State blows. Does it really matter who predicted them to finish where? Or what you definition of overrated is. This is so stupid. Gmoney, you need to start deleting this garbage.

It's bad enough that I have to watch the Browns and the Buckeyes for the next 3 months. I shouldn't have to continuously be exposed to the dumbest and most meaningless argument of all time.

-Damman

Anonymous said...

G$- This is the best hurricane ever! I think I have the only house in Columbus with power (and I enjoyed football alllll day yesterday). Also, work got called off this morning and could possibly get called off tomorrow and hopefully the rest of the week.

Gsaul-
Maybe you should go back and read my predictions again. I've picked every Michigan game so far. I may have given them too much credit with 5 wins. The only thing you have right is Ohio State being overrated (which putting them at 4 and saying they're overrated still doesn't make sense- you're contradicting yourself). You would have said that even if OSU had the best team ever because of your hatred for the Buckeyes.

Ohio State will still make a BCS bowl, and hopefully meet up with an SEC team. It is there where we will either a) win and get the monkey off our back or b) get blown out so Jim Heacock quits.

It's too bad you guys had to miss the Browns game last night. Braylon Edwards is running half speed, and he still can't catch. Romeo Crennel kicked a field goal while down 7 with 3 minutes to go. Amazing.

Dut

Mr. Ace said...

Fuck Michigan and OSU...and Dut. I had my USC shirt ready for the OSU game until Michigan showed up in South Bend and blew dick. Rooting for the conference, I don't even think those words should be able to be used in that order anymore, grow some fucking stones. I would like to start a petition to not allow Gsaul to be a Michigan fan anymore.

Dut,
After that performance you really think that you are going to run through the big ten? Not Likely.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Mr. Toolshed-

Ohio State has run through the big 10 the last 2 seasons while having an embarassing loss. The Big 10 is fucking bad. I can't see more than 1 loss in the Big 10.

Dut

Anonymous said...

G$/Damman,

In response to Damman's remark after the USC game; the "how can OSU have top 5 classes every year..." comment. The class of 2008 was actually the firt top 5 class OSU has had since 2002. The closest OSU got was # 7 in 2005. Other than that, OSU has been in the mid teens every other year between 2002 & 2008.

Lil' Strut

Anonymous said...

Hurricane Ike [Turner] ruined my Sunday as well, and it really better not be a blackout for the next seven days! G Funk, do you want to go looting?

--the Wig Master

GMoney said...

ace, GSaul was fine. He and were high-fiving during the game. It was his brother (you may know him as the worst fantasy football gm of all time) is the true shitty fan.

Li'l Strut, I deleted your comment where you use the "O" word. You were warned. I do not apologize for turning this blog communist either. Just wait until I form my own KGB.

Anonymous said...

G$,

Why don't you delete GSaul's 3rd from the top?

Like I said, none of this ever gets brought back up unless he instigates it.

Lil Strut

Anonymous said...

Lil Strut, it's not my fault that your argument is circular and completely flawed. If you recall, those were pre-season rankings. Why can't OSU be ranked fourth in the pre-season, yet be the "O" word once the season actually has begun and they lose 35-3? Does UT law school teach the meaning of "mutually exclusive?"

And if you claim that the requirement for determining the "O" was at the beginning of the season, then I have to look at the past seasons to make that judgment, which you claimed I couldn't do in your original comments. Dancing in circles, just like your football team.

And for the record, I was cheering for USC. My brother claimed to be cheering for his "alma mater" and not for the Big Ten conference.

GSaul

Anonymous said...

Out of respect for this blog and my own sanity for having to explain myself to you for the 9th time (which I thought I did well until my previous comment was deleted and yours shoud be too). I am not going to continue this any longer. I consider this matter close, agree to disagree.

Lil' Strut

P.S. Where is Capital in the US news rankings? Aren't they much lower than Toledo, I forget...

Mr. Ace said...

I must apologize to GSaul... but give mad, super dope, props to Lil Strut for reppin the Rockets.

Jon is a d-bag.

Anonymous said...

I actually didn't get to read your blog that was deleted, but I agree with you that the case is closed. No need for G$ to resort to Communism.

What's with the below the belt comment? I got into UT also, but decided I would rather live in Columbus. The rankings really had nothing to do with my decision.

Next time we are at the Stube I will buy you a beer to bury the hatchet, and I will just never rank OSU in the top 5 again.

GSaul

Anonymous said...

GSaul,

Sorry for the rankings comment, I felt I made a mistake right after I sent it. I actually wrestled with myself for about 3-4 weeks trying to decide between UT and Capital for the same reasons as you did I am sure, but ended up going the opposite way. BierStube it is! There is nothing like the threat of a communist regime to get Americans to set aside their differences. G$=Stalin!

Anonymous said...

Previous Comment was by me.

Lil' Strut

Anonymous said...

I might have rooted for OSU but i was also laughing my ass off at an OSU party and almost got in a fight. JIM TRESSEL = JOHN COOPER

GLICK

GMoney said...

Hey, who's buying me a beer for putting up with this horrendous argument? I deserve a full keg and a kick to the junk.

Glick, church it up however you want to, you are an embarrassment to Big Blue.

Mr. Ace said...

Awe, thats just precious. Now I am going to call you both fuckboys so you can come together against me and you can live happily ever after. Get fucked. This is competitive banter on a blog, a fucking blog. There is no such thing as below the belt, the gloves are off as soon as you make a post. You all make me sick, especially you glick. Be a man and stick with ur pick. It is undescribably lame that you were "rooting" for the fuckeyes, but that lameness could only be surpassed by your comment. If osu would have won you probably would have went up to ricks with ur tressel vest on and toasted to the fuckeyes success with the townies.

...no disrespect to your blog, gmoney. It is a daily masterpiece.

Randolph said...

YEAH GO BILLS!!!

GMoney said...

For the record, I have NO IDEA what this picture is about. Is he fighting through a pool of gummi-worms? Fuck that, he doesn't look blacked out to me.

Go Bills is right.

Anonymous said...

Who is Mr. Vagina; I need to know so I know whose ass I have to beat!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybbe I have been brain washed, but I just can't see cheering for the big ten to get set back in the rankings for another few years because everyone sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jon Saul

Anonymous said...

even though Michgan is embaressing to the whole conference!!!!

Go BLUE

Jon Saul