Monday, February 26, 2007

Oscar Analysis...G$ STYLE!!!


For the first time in my life, I actually watched all of the Oscars last night. Not because I wanted to or was intrigued by the nominees for best adapted screenplay, no, pretty much because I wanted to see The Departed and Forrest Whitaker win. BOO-YAH!!! Thanks, Academy.
Here are some notes:
--I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I though Ellen was funny.
--Randy Newman, that's right THE Randy Newman, got hosed in the best song category.
--Apparently Jack Nicholson's next role is to play Uncle Fester.
--I could watch clips of Don Knotts making goofy faces all day.
--Cate Blanchett and Kate Winselt are nominated EVERY year...there should be an anti-trust investigation regarding this monopoly.
--Jennifer Hudson will be nothing more than an ugly footnote in the landscape of cinema.
--Way to go, Alan Arkin!!! Now when I watch The Jerky Boys movie, I can say, "Academy Award winner, Alan Arkin is in it."
--Someone get Phillip Seymour Hoffman a comb, please.
--Kind of weird that the biggest star of the night was Al Gore. Yep, that guy. They guy that invented the internet was THEE star.
--I don't care how old she is, Helen Mirren is hot. Nuff said.
--The silhouette people that made the movie logos were interesting to say the least. FYI, they scared Josh.
--Reese Witherspoon looks like she went on the Nicole Richie/Olsen Twins diet of binging and purging. The initial thing that made her hot was that she was natural and offered a slight bit of cushion...but she is dangerously close to being sickly-lookin'.
--If I was a black guy and was important enough to have a movie made about my life, I want Forrest Whitaker to play me. The guy is one of the best actors ever...can anyone do drama better than him???
--Supporting actor front-runner, Eddie Murphy, got what he deserved. That being, you don't deserve to win when you make movies like Daddy Daycare, The Adventures of Pluto Nash, and Norbit the Buttfucker.
--Helen Mirren is gorgeous, had to say that again.
--The song with Jack Black, John C. Reilly, and Ben Wallace Ferrell was hilarious. And yes, it was clever for Reilly to say that he was in Boogie and Talladega Nights.
--Scorsese seems like a really nice guy and I was happy for him to win. It's always good to see these people get overwhelmed when they finally reach the pinnacle of their profession.
--Jackie Earle Haley is creepy...but it was nice of him to take a night off from shoving the trophy up the Yankees' ass. I need to watch Bad News Bears again.
--What's the deal with guys wearing scarves around their tuxedos??? In my best Chandler Bing impression, could they BE anymore queer?
--Good to see Meryl Streep wear a grandmother's pant-suit to the Oscars...who let her leave the house like that?
--I'm down with the random Larry David sighting in the audience.
--I'm completely fine with The Departed winning best picture...great movie, but I do want to see Little Miss Sunshine despite my rule of "don't watch any movie with Greg Kinnear." That rule was established after I realized As Good As It Gets was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.
I think that does it for my review. While the show is long as fuck, the pay-off at the end was worth the time spent watching it.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

disagree with almost everything you wrote. You seem bored and fat. Also, and this is just a guess, um, single. Nighty night.

GMoney said...

Well thanks, anonymous child molester. I have the balls to post who I am. Good morning.

Anonymous said...

Any idea how credit crunch affected porn?


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